


Homesick Human, Surfacesick Monsters

by XIANI



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: (sometimes i give names to NPCs hope that's alright!!), Bisexual Female Character, Eventual Romance, F/M, Female Reader, Magic, Multi, My First Fanfic, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Plot, Reader Is Not Chara (Undertale), Reader Is Not Frisk (Undertale), Reader has a crush on just about everybody lol, Reader-Insert, Romantic Comedy, Sans (Undertale) Has PTSD - Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Slow Burn, Slow Romance, Undertale Pacifist Route, Undertale Saves and Resets, i'll definitely be adding more tags as i go along!, she's super silly and likes to make jokes/not 'passive' or a damsel really, some angst oops
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-30
Updated: 2019-07-27
Packaged: 2019-09-02 12:07:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 23
Words: 43,793
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16786645
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/XIANI/pseuds/XIANI
Summary: You were expecting to enjoy your 20th birthday but no, birthdays never go the way you want them to, do they? Well, now you’ve discovered a whole nation of people - I mean, monsters, so that counts for something, I guess. And they're great, to your surprise. Hospitable. Funny. Endearing. But God, you just wanna go home. And as you will soon learn, so do they.





	1. A Hike? Yikes.

**Author's Note:**

> hello! this is my first fic!! hopefully it wasn't too long, i wasn't sure how long chapters could be so i looked around at other fics and settled on 1.8k! i also apologize that the first chapter is a little slow, but trust me, read till the end lmfao. there's only one undertale character so far, can you guess who? nyeh heh heh. 👀

When you imagined your 20th birthday, you thought your family and friends would throw you a big party to celebrate you graduating from your teen years. Perhaps they’d buy you that easel you wanted, or that really expensive camera you’ve been eyeing online. They might even tease you with alcohol you can’t legally drink yet and sing those silly versions of the ‘happy birthday’ song. Either way, you’d be surrounded by loved ones and be at your favorite place in the world: home. But no! That was too much to ask, you guessed. On the day of your birth, you found yourself hiking up a mountain on par with Mount Everest and hating every second of it.

You sighed dramatically, getting the attention of the two people hiking with you: your mother and step-father. “Why are we hiking up this mountain again?” Your mother continued walking, taking in the scenery as you watched her back. “Mt. Ebott is a huuuuge tourist attraction here, apparently! I’ve never been hiking but your _dad_ here wanted to see it before we flew back home tomorrow.” Your step-father suddenly became embarrassed, opting to look away and scratch his chin. So, it was his idea, huh? “Y-yeah, and what of it? Maybe I just wanted to spend time with my family, uh, in nature!”, he said, looking a bit guilty and embarrassed.

“Yeah, right!”, you snorted. “I think we're far enough now!”

The view was lovely. You could see houses and trees for miles! The air was nice and crisp and _refreshing_. Back home had nothing on this view, even if you won’t admit it your family or even to yourself. It was slightly out of your ‘degree range’ (didja _have_ to wear a rainbow crop top and short shorts _today_?) but it was an especially nice day. You, dare you say, _loved_ it. “C’mon now!”

The three of you laid out a wide, patterned sheet for the little picnic. While your parents debated on what to put where, you silently went off to explore the mountain a bit. What a relaxing stroll, being able to take in the serenity, the light rustle of leaves, the soft humming of birds... if there were any? You craned your neck to listen. The only howl you heard was from the wind.

Mt. Ebott, the ‘biggest’ tourist attraction of wherever this was, having no birds? Was this whole mountain made of plastic or something? You bent down to pick up a stray leaf. Upon inspecting it, it seemed to check out. Whatever, you didn’t want to think on it too much. _‘At least there’s no bird poop!’_ Before you were able to take a step in the direction of a cool looking cave you spotted, you heard your name angrily being called. You snickered, knowing they finally realized you were gone. “COMIIIIIING!”

You walked onto the sheet to your mother kneeling and appropriately sharing out all the snacks. You spotted cupcakes from your favorite shop. Aw, she shouldn’t have. “Jeez, whoever owns or upkeeps this mountain must have mon-ey!”, she laughed. "I’ve been sitting here for a while and haven’t seen not one bug crawl onto our sheet!” You cocked an eyebrow. “Really...?”, you muttered. No birds, no animals, no bugs. Hm. The Kermit ‘that’s none of my business’ meme suddenly came to mind. “Crazy, right! There aren’t any people here today either, it seems! It’s a little weird but I won’t look a gift horse in the mouth.”, she winked. “Please do go get your father for lunch, though. He said he was ‘picking cool berries’ over there.” She smirked and rolled her eyes, chucking her thumb in the direction behind you. Politely excusing yourself from the sheet, you started to jog in the direction of her thumb, throwing your many, many questions to the back of your mind. “Alright, be right back!”

He was nowhere to be found. The mountain was big, yes, but with the apparent lack of birds, bugs, and babies, you’d think he’d be easy to find, right? Wrong! Where could your old man have gone? Walking in circles proved futile until you caught a glimpse of a brightly colored shirt peeking out of the cave you meant to explore earlier. You jogged up to him quietly, wanting to scare him, but he was already shaking. Was he cold? You never knew him to be the easily cold type.

“Dad!” Your voice made him stop instantly. “Mum’s looking for you, it’s time to ea— woah.” Peering in, you could see the cave was very spacious, quite dim and weirdly moist with vines strewn around in every which direction. What a mess. “Come, look!”, your dad whisper yelled. He pointed directly into the center of the cave. How could you have not noticed _that_? It was a big, huge, giant, colossal ass hole right in the middle of the cave! Just staring at it made you feel a little queasy.

“Wh-what about it?”, you asked, trying to keep your cool as you basically looked into the damn abyss (from a good distance). Your knees shook as your father looked over you, smiling. It seemed quite deep. You weren’t scared of heights or anything, but reenacting Alice in Wonderland wasn’t something you had on your bucket list.

“Come on in, f—“, he giggled, stopping himself, “don't be scared, the water’s fiiiine.” His eyes were closed as he emphasized his little joke by tapping a foot in one of the cave’s shallow puddles. ‘F’? Was he about to call you ‘f*cker’ or what? Your step-dad was cool but not that cool. Or was he…? “Were you about to call me one of your other children’s names or something? Because if you have other children… me and ma will find out.”, you told him, half-joking and half-serious. There was a reason why you were on this trip with your step-father, and not your birth one. He meant a lot to you, and _definitely_ a lot to your mother. If he were to cheat…“No, of course not, my little buttercup. Just come explore with me. You wanna see something cool, right?”

Well, yeah, he was right. You did! Anything your dad showed you was always a ton of fun.

So you stepped inside.

* * *

Inside was even worse than you thought. Flowers grew all willy nilly and looked way more aggressive than the ones right outside of the cave. Survival of the fittest, you guessed. All the puddles were murky with dirt and decaying flower pieces. Rocks made the floor uneven, and stalactites made the thought of being here even scarier. One earthquake and you’d die comically like a 1930’s cartoon character. The overwhelmingly musty smell crept into your nostrils and choked you. “Good God, I hate this smell.” You pulled the small turtleneck of your crop top over your nose, still trying to explore. There wasn’t much left to look at except that ‘this is sparta!’-like hole you’ve been avoiding getting too close to.

“Can you see what’s down there?”, your old man yelled, from what it seemed like somewhere behind you. You shuffled closer to the crater by .2 inches. “Uhhh.. nope! Just darkness, boss.”, you said, doing a fake salute. Truth is, you were way too scared to go any closer. And something about this hole.. disturbed you. Slowly spinning on your heels, you attempted to walk back to the entrance. ‘ _Not today.. not ever.’_

**CRACK!**

What sounded like him loudly cracking his hands and neck made you jump. He chuckled. “You’re a smart girl. _I wouldn't have wanted to get any closer, either_.” Nonchalantly, he walked towards the entrance, purposely making his footsteps resonate in the cave. “But unfortunately, you just weren’t smart enough.” You laughed. “H-huh?” It was a nervous laugh, the kind of laugh that came forth when you’re really scared and unsure of what to do. “What... are you talking about?”

This.. wasn’t your dad.

His eyes searched the ceiling before locking onto yours. “Oh, please.”, he jeered, “You didn’t notice everything wrong with this mountain? Was there nothing even a tiny bit off to you?” There was. Things were off but with every new question that came to mind, you shoved it to the back of your mind for later. _So stupid!_ But your own dad…?

“You didn’t notice the lack of animals? The lack of birds?” You did. “Not even one insignificant little bug roaming through the grasses?” You did. “This mountain is a very popular touring spot, no? But on a Saturday afternoon… there’s absolutely no _people_?” You knew it. You knew it, you knew it, you knew it. And he knew that you knew… He smirked. It wasn’t friendly. It was **terrifying**.

“Legend says that those who climb the mountain never return.” Something gleamed from behind his leg. A knife. “I know that _quite_ well.”, he barked. “You’ll either become a hero or heartless down there... Which will you be?”

You wanted to say, ‘Stop dad, haha! You’re so funny!’, but you knew this was real. Were all of these years together for show? He did so much for you! For your mom! Fear gripped you by the neck. You felt like you couldn't breathe.

Lowering himself into a three-point stance, he said, clearly and precisely, " _get ready_." It was a voice you couldn’t recognize anymore. “One, two, three, aha—!” He was making a mad dash towards you, his knife holding hand outstretched. ‘ _Please… move… legs… **move**!’_

They couldn’t.

Before you is your dad, no, _was_ your dad. Behind you is uncertain, no, _certain_ death. The floors were wet and uneven, could you even run? No, all you could do was close your eyes, waiting for impact.

In a flash, a hand was crushing your head, forcibly keeping your eyes open, while the other held the knife uncomfortably close to your neck. You winced. His eyes were red. Depraved. This wasn’t your dad.

“I said... which. will. you. _be_?”

“I-"

_PUSH_

And with that, you were gone, falling to your death. Time felt slow. You saw him waving at you, not a hint of remorse in his face. You closed your eyes, hot tears finally being able to spill from them freely. “ _Goodbye_.” You heard the knife drop and a piercing yell bounce off of the cave walls.

_Huh_?

With your last look, you gazed at the man who orchestrated your death. You saw genuine desperation in his eyes.

He was reaching for you.


	2. Cave Fursuiter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> two more undertale charas! and a few common monsters. we're gettin' somewhere!! >:-)  
> this was slightly longer than my first chapter (+500 more words) yet feels so much shorter to me lol. what is the magic number for chapters omfg! i'll get the hang of it soon, i hope.

…wake up…

human…! wa…

…? get up, will you…?

this isn’t your time to die.

“AH! What in the..?”

Looking around, you noticed you were alone. Alive, but alone. The bed of yellow flowers that you found yourself in seemed to have broken your fall… somehow. Or maybe they indicated this is where you had died? ‘ _Wow, wasn’t expecting to be sent to hell so soon_ ’, you joked to yourself, but unfortunately, this was no laughing matter. Where were you? You hit yourself, trying to make sure you were real. “Oh, thank God. I’m alive, I think.”

Good, you were alive! But, uh, again.. where _were_ you? Wobbling, you eventually were able to stand upright. You wiped away the now dried tears with one hand, attempting to keep back new ones with the other. Right now wasn’t the time for crying, outbursts or anything unproductive. “The only thing I can do is.. go forward, I guess.”, you whispered to yourself. A stick on the ground caught your attention. _‘To pick it up, or not to pick it up, that is the question.’_

Nahhhhh.

You quietly and carefully made your way down the only hall available to you, until you were met with a door. A beautifully accented door.. big enough for an elephant and maybe a giraffe.. in the bottom of a cave.. where no one should be. “Hm.” You did a quick run back to pick up the stick and sighed. This was just the beginning of you getting the _hell_ out of here, wasn’t it?

* * *

Past the door, you could see spooky creepy darkness, another door, and a room... with light! ..But couldn’t tell the distance between the two. So you didn’t think, you just went. You ran like a track and field athlete towards that fated door, trying to channel your inner cheetah and also not fall flat on your face. You got pretty far until something sprouted out of the ground, skidding you to a halt. “What, a mole?” No, it was a… flower.

“HOWDY! I’m Flow—”

“ **WHAT THE _HELL_** —” Your first instinct was to hit that _thing_ with the stick, abandon said stick, and run. And that you did. “AH! Stupid _little_ … Oh, fleeing, are you? I guess little old me will have to teach you how things work around here!”

Tugging. You felt like you were being pulled backwards by your hair, but it was by your chest. The feeling wasn’t painful, just wholly uncomfortable, especially when it felt like your body and chest were being pulled in two different directions. Your vision was fading to black. As you were gasping for air and reaching out for the door, you could feel fire pass over your face.. and hit your attacker. “Ah.. ha..” You clawed at your chest, hoping to stabilize your anxiety while checking to make sure were intact.

You’re okay, for now. That’s when you look up from the ground. ‘ _Oh, God, what?’_

“What a terrible creature, torturing such a poor, innocent youth. Ah, do not be afraid, my child.” She – well, you guessed it was a she – used fire to illuminate the room, she must have seen the frightened look on your face. “I am Toriel, caretaker of the Ruins. I pass through this place every day to see if anyone has fallen down. You are the first human to come here in a long time. Come! I will guide you through the catacombs.”

“H-human…?” Was that what furries called nonfurries? She just couldn’t have been a furry though, her ‘suit’ was way too lifelike. She blinked, she breathed, her mouth and tongue moved to make words. You were in the presence of a real six foot something goat woman and honestly? You weren’t sure how to react.

“This way!” With the flower mole thing gone, and no other door to go through, you followed. “Uh… ma’am…?” She turned around with a soft smile on her face. “Yes, child? Or maybe, um, teenager…?” She looked you up and down, noticing your body, height, and clothes, then blushed. ‘ _SHE’S SO CUTE!’_

“O-oh, it’s no big deal! I actually just got out of my teen years today, but, uh, you seem to be much older than me. It’s fine if you call me ‘child’.” You meekly smiled back at her. “My question, though… Was that a flower? A, um, talking flower? Actually, never mind, you’re a talking goat. N-no offense or anything!” She snorted. “Oh, yes, that is a flower! He has been bothering humans that fall down here for some time. And yes, I am a goat! Do not ask me to ‘baa’.” Toriel put on a faux ‘mad’ face, then giggled. “You’ve never met a monster before, have you, young one?”

* * *

The walk throughout the Ruins was nothing short of eventful. You tried being on guard and reserved but ended up talking about your lives anyways. Sometimes, Toriel would have you do things yourself such as flip switches to solve puzzles, or she’d help you herself by holding your hand and leading you through it.

“As a human living in the Underground, monsters may attack you. You will need to be prepared for this situation. However, worry not! The process is simple. When you encounter a monster, you will enter a 'fight'. While you are in a 'fight', strike up a friendly conversation. Stall for time. I will come to resolve the conflict. Practice talking to the dummy!”

You guessed this dummy was alive as well (wasn’t the flower?), so you decided to just stare at it. It seemed as if it was staring back at you, too. After a few minutes of staring, the dummy tired of your aimless shenanigans and flew right out the room. You looked at Toriel. Toriel looked at you. “…The next room awaits.”

There were so many puzzles! And aggressive frogs. And sentient jello. And weird fairy ghost things. The Ruins were like nothing you had experienced before, ever. “Here is my humble abode!” Toriel pointed to the house past the tree in the middle of the yard. “Oh, gosh, I forgot!”, she said shyly, “W-wait here!” Walking quickly into her house, she slammed the door. “Perhaps she forgot to tidy up, y’know how that goes.” Instead of intruding onto her home, you decided to explore around it.

You stood by the tree, watching the leaves dance as they fell. Then you tried reading the sign above her door, but the writing seemed to be smudged. To your left was a shining, float-y diamond… light? You remember seeing a few during your walk with Toriel but never thought to take one. What were they, anyway? Pretty and enticing, you touched it. **Blip**! You snatched your hand back, startled by the noise. “Ooo..kaaaay..” Your hand went right through it! Guess you won’t be stealing those.

Your new goat friend poked her head out of the door. “M-my child, you may come in now!”, running back inside as quick as she came. Walking in, her house smelled divine. “! It is a butterscotch-cinnamon pie. I forgot to ask you your favorite, so I baked both of my specials into one! I thought we might celebrate your arrival. I want you to have a nice time living here. So, I will hold off on snail pie for tonight, heehee.” You gagged. “S-snail pie?!”

_‘Wait, no’_ , you thought to yourself. _‘Living here…?’_

“Make yourself at home! Your room is the first room on the left. If you need me, I will be in the living area. I have so many old books to share with you!”

_You couldn’t stay here_. Toriel had been nothing but sweet and motherly to you, but… you wanted to be with your own mom. You had to see her again. But, the least you could do was look inside the room you’d be ‘staying’ in. It was very, uh, monochromatic, but cozy. “This is such a kid’s room! Aw, this drawing on the wall is so cute.” You looked around the room, your eyes falling on the bed. You wanted to sleep so bad. This mixture of pure exhaustion and raging anxiety was eating at you. It’s as if your body was fighting with itself and you couldn’t get any relief. It wasn't Toriel's fault at all but you… you had to get out of here.

Pulling up a chair besides Toriel’s recliner, you started to talk to her about anything and everything. It was so hard to talk to this sweet woman knowing you were just chatting her up to ask her about leaving her. “I am glad to have you living here. Oh, did you want something?” _Ouch_. “No, n-not really. I just wanted to know about the book you were reading.” Toriel’s whole face lit up, making you feel even worse. “Ah! It is called ‘72 Uses for Snails’. How about it?”

“How… riveting.” As sarcastic as you probably sounded, you honestly were interested but your mind was elsewhere. “Did you know that snails have a chainsaw-like tongue called a radula? Interesting, is it not?” You laughed a pitiful laugh. “It is. Excuse me, though.”

Entering the kitchen just made you sadder. You saw the gigantic pie she had baked – just for you! – cooling on the counter. You helped yourself to a small piece, not wanting to seem greedy. “This is… good.” The more you ate, the closer you were to tears. _‘Suck it up, girl. You have to do it.’_

“Toriel.” You hear the recliner squeak a bit. “Oh, yes?” Putting down the piece of pie felt like the hardest thing you’ve ever had to do. “How do I leave? How do I leave the Ruins?”

The silence was unbearable. “I… have something to do. Stay here, okay?” She got up quickly, setting her book on the side table next to her. Something didn’t feel right.

You followed her.

She was nowhere to be found. The stairs that you passed when coming to talk to Toriel seemed like the only place she could be. Jumping down them proved to be the correct choice. “You wish to know how to return ‘home’, do you not? Ahead of us lies the end of the RUINS. A one-way exit to the rest of the underground. I am going to destroy it. No one will ever be able to leave again.”

“What? No!”, you yelled. “Toriel, I need to go home! I know you’re a good person. Why would you keep me here?” Toriel stopped walking, gathering her words together. There was a distinct sadness in her voice. “Every human that falls down here meets the same fate. They come. They leave. They die. You naive chi—…”

She looked back at you, then looked down at her feet. “If you leave the RUINS... They.. _Asgore_... will kill you. I am only protecting you, do you understand?” As she took a step forward, tears dropped on the floor. “I… You know what? You are… an adult… I… I cannot keep you here… But I really am just trying to keep you safe. I am.” She turned to you, tears still rolling down her fur. “If you truly wish to leave... I… will not stop you. However, when you leave... Please… do not come back. Do you understand?”

Toriel stood in the middle of the hallway, right in between you and the door to your freedom. Hours ago, you probably would have hit _her_ with your stick if it meant leaving. But now? You felt bad for even asking to leave. You almost feel bad for even wanting to see your own family! But you knew you had to go. How long would it have taken you to know the Ruins like the back of your hand? Two days, tops! You'd go crazy here.

You hugged Toriel, which shocked her. Fuzzy, warm hands clasped themselves behind your back, returning the hug. “I’m so sorry, Toriel. I _hate_ to leave you lonely like this. I wish I could have stayed. You’re the best monster mom I’ve ever had! Even though I’ve never had a monster mom before. And this Asgore guy.. As afraid as I am to die or get hurt, I must leave. I almost died today but I'm here, right? Plus, they'll go home running when they see THESE!” You flexed and winked at her. Toriel gave a weak smile, wiped her tears, and headed back upstairs. You reached out to stop her, but you knew she wasn’t coming back.

“I guess this is it. It’s time to go home.” You sighed. ‘ _I hope to see her again. I really do.’_

Skipping down the long, never-ending hallway filled you with anxiety. "I'm going home... it's alright.", you told yourself. Except, it brought you right back to someone you hoped you'd never see again.

"Clever. Verrrryyy clever. You think you're really smar— ack!" You lost your stick to it last time, so you did what any sane person would do. "STOP TALKING TO ME!", you yelled as you were stomping the day lights out of it like it was a game of whack-a-mole. "WHATEVER YOU ARE, FIND ANOTHER GIRL TO BOTHER!" Your 17th kick to the face seemed to do the trick. Stunned and seemingly close to tears, it went back into the ground it came from.

‘ _Whew_.’ After taking a few minutes to gather yourself (and looking repeatedly over your shoulder), you used all your strength to open the door. A breeze like you've never felt before in your life brushed up against your face.

“Aaaaand it’s snowy. Goddammit.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope y'all enjoyed the slight toriel bonding! i love her, i hated leaving her in UT and i hate leaving her again in my own damn fic. but at least some anatomically incorrect siblings are coming up next! 👀


	3. Snowplace Like Home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for such a long time between chapters, i've been super sick/tired! i'm not entirely happy w/ the end this chapter, i'll be sure to come back and rewrite it a bit at a later date! hope you still enjoy it, though!

As far as the eye could see, there was only snow. Cold. Ice. This was your first time seeing snow and here it was, at the bottom of a freaky mountain cave. Or ‘the Underground’ as Toriel seemed to have called it. You missed her already. Up ahead was a piece of wood barely covering a large chasm in the middle of the trail. “Uhhh…”, you mumbled. “This doesn’t seem very sturdy..” There was also a gate that seemed fairly useless. You sighed, looking through the bars into the forest _. ‘Just how much longer until home..?’_

Behind you, you heard a twig snap.

“ _human_.”

You jumped. This was the deepest voice you’d heard down here so far. Would you have to ‘fight’ whoever this deep voiced monster is? You gulped, hard.

“Don't you know how to greet a new pal?”, the mysterious voice chuckled.

_‘A new pal?’_ You turned around, hoping to see who this friendly sounding person was behind you, but all you saw was shadow. So you ran. Yes, right over the spooky hole, onto the other side of the trail. _‘ **G2G**!’_ It felt like all you did was run in this place. When you looked behind you, the person, monster, whatever was gone. Not knowing what you were up against made you run even faster until you knocked right into something incredibly solid at full speed. A.. skeleton. Feeling yourself fall in and out of consciousness, you decided to leave with one last joke. “Don’t… harvest… my org…ans please…”

“…what?”

And everything went black.

You really startled him. He was _supposed_ to say, “Turn around and shake my hand.”, then hit you with the ol’ whoopee cushion trick. No matter how many humans fall down here, that never got old. It’s ALWAYS funny. He never expected you to run. He.. didn’t expect a lot of things. But now you're passed out in the snow, severely underdressed for the climate.

With too many choices and not enough concrete answers, all he could do right now was give you his jacket and wait until you came to. “and i thought papyrus was the human-hunting fanatic.” he muttered, carefully pulled the hoodie over your head, “heh, look at me.” He thought about hiding you behind the sentry station before his cooler older brother passed through, but it seems he didn’t have time.

“sup, bro?” The taller skeleton crossed his arms, huffing. “YOU KNOW WHAT ‘SUP’, BROTHER! IT'S BEEN EIGHT DAYS AND YOU STILL HAVEN'T... RECALIBRATED. YOUR. PUZZLES! YOU JUST HANG AROUND OUTSIDE YOUR STATION! WHAT ARE YOU… EVEN… DOING…?” His eyes fell upon the jacket that seemed to have sprouted legs. “WHAT. IS THAT.” Sans shrugged. “just my jacket. want to take a look?”

“NO!! WELL, ACTUALLY, YES. WHAT IS THAT? THERE’S A PAIR OF LEGS UNDER THERE AND THEY DON’T EVEN SEEM TO BE METTATON’S.” Sans scrunched his cheeks, rather confused on his brother’s reply. _Everything was ever so slightly off, but the end result is all the same._

Papyrus opened the jacket to find you comatose. You should have been a secret at least for a few more miles, but that was another story. “SANS, OH MY GOD, IS THAT A HUMAN? WOWIE! I WOULD HAND THEM OVER TO UNDYNE AND BECOME POPULAR! POPULAR! POPULAR! BUT THEY SEEM… COLD.” He scooped you up and held you like how Sans’ think to hold baby bones. “SHOULDN’T WE TAKE THEM TO THE HOUSE? OOO, AND I JUST BUILT A HUMAN CAPTURE ZONE IN THE TOOL SHED!” Sans chuckled. “the couch will be fine, bro.”

Walking through Snowdin didn’t yield any unsavory results, surprisingly. Hardly anyone asked what was under his coat despite two long legs dangling from his brother’s arms. Whenever anyone was curious, Papyrus assured them this “most definitely wasn’t a human in any way, shape, or form” and that he was going to place the “not human” in the “Not Human Capture Zone” in their tool shed. Whatever works.

After retrieving the keys from his shorts, Sans opened the door to their shared home. Warmer breeze seeped out from the open door, welcoming him back. Before Sans could say anything, Papyrus placed you on the couch gently. “WHEN WILL THEY WAKE UP? I HOPE THEY’RE NOT A LAZYBONES LIKE YOU, NAPPING FOR OVER 7 HOURS EACH NIGHT… BUT I DO WORRY. ACTUALLY, I’M WORRIED SICK!! NO MATTER WHAT I DO, THEY DON’T WAKE UP!” Papyrus bit away at his gloves. “ARE HUMANS MEANT TO BE THIS WAY? IT’S LIKE THEY’RE BROKEN, SANS! NYOO HOO HOO…”

“don’t be such a bonehead.”, he winked. “they’ll come to real soon.”

_‘i hope.’_

“PERHAPS I SHOULD MAKE SPAGHETTI FOR THEM BEFORE THEY WAKE UP! I’M SURE THEY’LL APPRECIATE A MEAL, ESPECIALLY WHEN COOKED BY SUCH A LOVELY SKELETON SUCH AS MYSELF.” A valiant pose Sans knew all too well was being displayed in the middle of the living room. “I’LL GET THE WATER STARTED!”

With Papyrus away in the kitchen, Sans intensely inspected you. The bag on your shoulder piqued his interest, but there was nothing of interest inside. Just a cellphone, a small wallet, and some sort of wrapped... napkin? Nothing dangerous. “hm. she’s taller than most...”, he muttered.

_‘she’s even taller than you.’_

His pinprick eyes fell upon your shirt. Your outfit wasn’t suited for Snowdin or even Waterfall, but you might just get away with it in Hotland. And with so many colors and stripes… did it mean something? Monster children were known by their striped shirts but there were _so_ many stripes on yours while most kids had 2 – 4. He needed to watch out for ‘this one’. _‘kid or not, i can’t afford to lose him again.’_

Instead of fretting over his new discovery, he decided to help Paps in the kitchen. Spending as much time with him as he could was his life motto.. for reasons. “need help?”, he asked. “NOPE! BUT DO I WANT HELP? ALSO NOPE! BUT FOR YOU, I’LL MAKE AN EXCEPTION. COME STIR THE POT!! AND DON’T BOONDOGGLE!”

* * *

‘ _Mmm_.. _So much commotion_.. or is that fighting?’ Whatever it was, it was loud. Your first thought was you were back at Toriels. But, Toriel’s living room looked nothing like this.. and her house never sounded anything like this, either. You shot up from the couch you were laying on, only to clutch your chest in pain. What hit you, a freight train? Your chest was tender and sore, but you couldn’t worry about pain now, or about this blue jacket you somehow acquired. You needed to get out. Quickly scanning the area, you see a door just a few feet away.

“i don’t think you’re supposed to stir it that fast… you’re stirring it pasta than a speeding bullet.” Your eyes widened. _‘THAT’S THE VOICE THAT WAS BEHIND ME BEFORE I PASSED OUT!’_ Another mysterious voice spoke up. “SANS, MAKE ONE MORE PUN AND I WILL ABSOLUTELY LOSE IT.” _Two_ men? If you didn’t need to get out before, you definitely needed to get out now. But how?

You couldn’t see what was going on from the couch, so you decided to crawl closer to peek inside. Spaghetti sauce coated the kitchen’s floor. _‘They’re just... cooking? Terribly, but cooking.’_ You reached inside your bag to throw something inside the kitchen as a distraction.. but forgot you left your bag near the couch. ‘ _Crap_!’ You quickly looked back but decided to leave it, you’d make too much noise. Turning your head back onto the people presumably holding you hostage, you were met with a grin.

“heya.”

You froze, stared, then screamed.

“SANS! I THOUGHT WE BOTH AGREED THERE’S TO BE NO HIGH-PITCHED SCREAMING ON WEDNESDAYS. OH, THE HUMAN! HOW ARE YOU FEELING? I THOUGHT YOU WERE A GONER! PLEASE LET US KNOW BEFORE PASSING OUT NEXT TIME. HERE’S SOME MONSTER CANDY!”

You couldn’t help but stare.

There wasn’t just one _skeleton_ man, but two. One was tall and boisterous. He also was wearing some sort of armor, yet no pants. _‘An exhibitionist?’_ The other was short and stout. That one had to be Sans. They were both skeletons yet had entirely different bodies and face shapes. You guessed they were cousins.

“…SANS, CAN SHE HEAR ME? PERHAPS I SHOULD BE LOUDER.” You snapped back to reality. “No, I can hear! I just, um… I am very…” Tired. Exhausted. Drained. Anxious. Distressed. Did you say tired already? In need of rest. Restless. _Homesick_. You sighed in defeat. “Can I just ask a question? Wh-who are y’all? What do you want from me?”

Both skeletons stared at you wide-eyed (wide-eyesocketed?). “DO NOT BE AFRAID! IT IS I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS. AND HERE IS MY LAZY BROTHER, SANS!”

“hi.”

“SANS… FOUND YOU??? I’M UNSURE BECAUSE HE NEVER EXPLAINED THAT PART. EITHER WAY YOU WERE COLD, SO WE BROUGHT YOU TO OUR HOUSE! I EVEN MADE YOU SPAGHETTI!”

Ah, that explained the floor. And the smell. The tall one helped you up to your feet (albeit a little clumsily), while the short one set the table. “TAKE A SEAT!” A plate with a rock covered in sprinkles was removed from the table by the taller one. “sorry, bro.”

Well, you were in their debt. They were hospitable and didn’t seem dangerous. Were all monsters like Toriel? You prayed that was true. It’s not like you had a choice right now. You were hungry and the time you spent in the snow was terrible on your psyche and body. _‘This jacket is warm at least’_ , you thought. Who’s was it, though? You opened your mouth to ask but was stopped almost immediately.

“how are you feeling?”, the short one asked before you were able to get your question out. He had on basketball shorts, socks, slippers, and a sleeveless tee. It had a few barely noticeable stains. With one eyesocket closed, his small white eye light looked over your face for a response. Despite him smiling, his gaze was a little intense. “Oh, I’m uh, I’m good. As good as a girl who passed out in the snow can be. Sans, right? I’m guessing this jacket is yours? Sorry, I’m sure you want it back.” You started to unzip but was stopped by a bony hand. “keep it. you’ll freeze to the bone here in snowdin.” He winked at you despite a lack of eyelid. “i have others.”

Down to the… did he just make a bone pun?

“SANS! NOT ANOTHER WORD FROM YOU! DIG IN, HUMAN! HOPEFULLY MY BROTHER’S TERRIBLE PUNS DIDN’T RUIN YOUR APPETITE.”

Maybe it did, maybe it was just the anxiety you were feeling, maybe it was Maybelline. Either way, you had to eat. You were pretty weak.

“Bon appetit?”

The spaghetti was horrid.

Both skeletons watched you earnestly. Sans looked at you with a sly smirk on his face, like he knew. (HOW’D HIS FOOD DISAPPEAR SO FAST?) Pappu—Pas—Papyrus? looked at you, begging you to say something about his dish. He looked so sweet, so adorable, but this was disgusting. DISGUSTING! You sneakily spit the spaghetti back onto the plate. “Papyrus, uh… what’s in this here spaghetti?” He sprang up, rattling the table. “AH! I CAN’T TELL YOU MY ENTIRE RECIPE… BUT A MAIN INGREDIENT IS GLITTER! UNDYNE S—” You stopped him before he even went any further. “GLITTER? YOU HAD ME EAT _GLITTER_? I KNOW YOU’RE LIKE, A SKELETON, BUT HUMANS DIE FROM THAT.”, you squawked. Sans nearly doubled over in laughter at your expression. A jokester, huh? “M-MY APOLOGIES! I’VE NEVER COOKED FOR A HUMAN BEFORE. I GUESS THE GREAT PAPYRUS ISN’T SO GREAT AFTER ALL…”

“N-no, I didn’t mean it like thaaaat. There’s edible glitter, I think! Just try that next time.” Even though you just met Papyrus, you felt a huge need to protect him. He really was sweet. In one sweep, your hands were between his gloved hands, eliciting a squeak from you. “WILL YOU HELP ME FIND IT? YOU MIGHT EVEN BE A BETTER TEACHER THAN UNDYNE!”

“Oh, yeah, sure, uhh...” You shyly looked away until your eyes landed on your phone in your half-opened purse. Your phone? YOUR PHONE! WHY DIDN’T YOU TRY USING YOUR PHONE HOURS AGO? You snatched your hands from his, getting up from the table so fast you caused the chair to slide. Your shaking fingers clicked on your mom’s picture. “S-sorry, hold on!”

_Ring.. ring.._

**CALL FAILED**

‘ _Hm_.’ You tried again. CALL FAILED. And again! CALL FAILED! One last time. CALL. FAILED. “Mom…” Seeing her face just did something to you. “I’m really stuck down here…” Shaking and clutching your phone to your chest, you looked at the brothers who were staring at you sadly. "D...don't look at me, I-I’m.. fine." Sans got up from his seat and took you by the shoulder and Papyrus followed suit. They brought you back over to the comfy green couch you woke up on. Despite their hands being literal bone without flesh, they were surprisingly flesh-like and gentle.

"HUMAN..."

"...wanna talk about it?”

“…

Yeah.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh no, reader's emotions are finally catching up to her! will she be able to get signal somewhere in the underground? will sans and papyrus have the key to get her tf out of here? will reader just freeze to death because of her outfit choices? find out next time on dragon ball zeeee!


	4. I Hate Flowers At This Point

On their comfy little couch, you began explaining everything. You told them about how it was your birthday (Papyrus hugged you and yelled ‘HAPPY BIRTHDAY, HUMAN!’ _really_ loudly) and how you and your family decided to scale Mt. Ebott for a picnic in a state you were just visiting. It took a lot to explain how your own step-father pushed you down the mountain, obviously attempting to kill you. Speaking on it started to light a fuse in you, you just wanted to punch something.

“He looked… possessed. My dad has never ever been like that. He’s always been, well, a dad!” Snot and tears dribbled down your face prompting Papyrus to hand you a tissue from his armor. “Oh, thank you. I don’t know what to do.. and I feel really embarrassed that I’m sitting on a couch with two people I hardly know crying my heart out.” A slight blush crept on your face but was hidden by the rest of your face being red and puffy from crying. “I’m not used to being, uh, like this…”, you said, slowly put your head into your hands, “I’m literally in a whole different world… I just.. wish I knew the way out.”

Yet another slightly less awkward silence. Was this such a hard topic to talk about? For a quick second, Sans looked very uncomfortable. Papyrus looked similarly except he was sweating. You weren’t going to ask how he could sweat. “Wh-what? Did I say something bad? This other lady acted the same exact way.”

“lady?”

“Oh, yeah, this really tall, uh, goat woman! Floppy ears, really sweet, good at baking pies and making snail puns.” Sans closed his eyes and smiled bitterly. Upon opening them, he was back to his usual self. _‘An ex, maybe?’_

“TO REACH THE EXIT, YOU WILL HAVE TO MEET THE KING ALL MONSTERS... FORTUNATELY, HE'S A BIG FUZZY PUSHOVER!!! EVERYBODY LOVES THAT GUY. I AM CERTAIN IF YOU JUST SAY, ‘EXCUSE ME, MR. DREEMURR... CAN I PLEASE GO HOME?’ HE'LL GUIDE YOU RIGHT TO THE BARRIER HIMSELF! BUT…”

“But…?”, you squeaked.

“NOT ALL MONSTERS ARE LIKE HIM. EVEN MY BEST FRIEND, UNDYNE, MIGHT…”

You shifted into a more relaxed position towards Papyrus. “I get it. Toriel told me the same thing! Wouldn’t be the first time I fought someone, but you guys do it… differently. I don’t want to hurt anyone. Trust me, I’d just like to go home.” You took a deep breath, massaging your hands as you thought upon what Papyrus just said. “Wait, what’s the barrier about?”

“the barrier is what keeps us monsters down here.”

His voice startled you a little bit even though he had been sitting beside you this whole time.

“YUP! THAT'S THE MAGICAL SEAL TRAPPING US ALL UNDERGROUND. ANYTHING CAN ENTER THROUGH IT, LIKE YOU DID, BUT NOTHING CAN EXIT. EXCEPT SOMEONE WITH A POWERFUL SOUL... LIKE YOU!!! THAT'S WHY THE KING WANTS TO ACQUIRE A HUMAN. HE WANTS TO OPEN THE BARRIER WITH SOUL POWER. THEN US MONSTERS CAN RETURN TO THE SURFACE!” You squinted. _‘Acquire’ doesn’t sound too good.’_

“I barely understand this whole ‘soul’ thing… I mean, I’ve always believed I am a soul that pilots a body like a fleshy mech robot. But have people always been able to do that? To pull out their soul and fight people? On the surface, we just fight with fists. And I’d say I’m pretty proficient.” You made a smug little face to yourself, remembering all the people you’ve knocked out for disrespecting you. Sucks that won’t work down here.

“WANT ME TO SHOW YOU?”

“Oh, about souls? Sure! If I’m gonna be down here for a bit longer, I’ll definitely need to know more about what I’m dealing with.”

“paps—”

***KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK***

“JUST A SECOND.” When Papyrus got up from the couch, you noticed how tall he was. He basically towered over you. Most people were shorter than you or at eye level, but Papyrus was really, really tall. It wasn’t threatening though, especially when Papyrus seemed like he couldn’t hurt a fly. It was just a bit surprising, yet a nice change of pace. “I’LL GET IT!”

…But nobody came. “That’s weird. Maybe it was a prank? Do you have any prankster friends?” Papyrus shook his fist. “UNDYNE.” You walked to the doorpost to help look. “Who’s this Undyne person you keep talking about?” As you looked, Papyrus’ long arm pointed excitedly behind you out into the snow. “OH, THERE GOES ANOTHER ONE OF MY FRIENDS, FLOWERY!”

“flowery?”

“Flow—"

Whatever it was hurriedly made its way under the snow, popping up closer to you. Not that freakin’ flower again. “AHAHAHAH! You think these BOZOS could teach you what a SOUL is? If only you got this over with the first time you fell down here. Here we go!”

“n—”

You couldn’t escape the tugging this time. Papyrus and Sans were nowhere to be found as you were in this mysterious pitch-black room. Was this in your mind, were you in your body right now? You couldn’t tell. But you had to stay focused on _it_.

“See what happens when you don’t let the route run as it’s supposed to? Anyways! Where was I? Oh, yeah! I'm FLOWEY. FLOWEY the FLOWER! You're new to the UNDERGROUND, aren'tcha? Golly, you must be so confused. Wait, these lines don’t work anymore, do they?”, Flowey rolled his eyes. “Anyways, see that heart? That is your SOUL, the very culmination of your being! Your SOUL starts off weak, but can grow strong if you gain a lot of LV. What's LV stand for? Why, LOVE, of course! You want some LOVE, don't you?”

“No, not particularly.”, you said with a very flat, annoyed expression. What was he even going on about? Lines? Love? “Your soul’s… pink? Pink. Romance. Love~ Maybe you’ve earned some already, huh?” His smug expressions were really trying your patience.

Suddenly, five floating… things were behind Flowey. They did not look friendly. “Down here, LOVE is shared through... Little white... "friendliness pellets." Are you ready? Move around! Get as many as you can!” So you did the exact opposite of that and dodged all five. “Hey buddy, you missed them. Let's try again, okay?”, he mocked. “Let’s not and say we did.”, you interjected. Again, you dodged the pellets. “Is this a joke? Are you braindead? RUN. INTO. THE—”

“PAPYRUS! SANS!” You didn’t know if calling out their names would work, but you did it anyway. Toriel was able to save you last time! Your voice seemed to hit the ceiling of this small ‘room’ then fade into existence. “Aww, did you thi— argh!” A femur sent Flowey _flying_. You could just barely hear a voice cut through the darkness. “BAD FLOWERY! MY FLOWERY WOULD NEVER ACT LIKE THIS!” The black started to fade back to the ‘sky’ you were looking at just before you were challenged by the stupid plant. You felt like you were about to fall so you clung onto the closest thing you could: Papyrus. “O-OH!” A slightly reddish tinge was on his knobby cheeks. “ARE YOU OKAY, HUMAN??” You shuddered. “I think so, yeah. Thank you for saving me.”

Papyrus lowered an eyebrow bone. “OH, HUMAN, I DI—” Sans peeked his head from behind Papyrus, grinning from earhole to earhole. “isn’t papyrus so cool?” Papyrus looked between you two, still confused. “Yeah, you are, Pap!”, you said, giving his chest armor a light tap. “No need to be modest!” You beamed at Papyrus, making him give back a sheepish smile. Sans laid his hand out for you to hold.

"come inside."

With a few small snowflakes in your hair, you dropped back onto the couch. Papyrus closed the door gently. “so.”

“So…”

“SO?”

“you have to stay here.”, Sans shrugged.

“WH—Why! Because of… Flowey?”, you asked. “yeah. seems the little bugger has a vendetta against you.” Putting your hand on your chin, you started to wonder. “I’m… really not sure why. Well, I did hit him with a stick. And curb stomped him. BUT ONLY BECAUSE HE STARTLED ME SO BAD! I-I am not violent in day to day life.”, you smiled weakly.

“yeah that’ll, uh, that’ll do it.”

“HUMAN, YOUR STRENGTH AND DETERMINATION SEEMS ON PAR WITH UNDYNE’S.”

“WHO is Undyne? You’ve mentioned them a few times now. I’ve only met both of you and Toriel, and the flower, and a few less sentient monsters.”

“UNDYNE IS THE CAPTAIN OF THE ROYAL GUARD! AND MY MOM! FIGURATELVELY. YOU’LL MOST LIKELY MEET HER IF YOU STAY HERE. SHE MAY SUPLEX YOU BUT IT’S ONLY OUT OF LOVE. WELL, YOU’RE A HUMAN SO IT MIGHT BE OUT OF HATE.”

A chuckle escaped you. It’s not like you had anywhere else to go. Toriel wouldn’t take you back and you didn’t know anyone else. Even if you found somewhere to go, you’d probably freeze to death trying to traverse through Snowdin. Curse you and your fashion choices. You just weren’t sure if you were comfortable staying with two men you hardly knew. But they were skeletons, they were severely lacking in the uh, genitals department. There would really be no way to try anything. They could kill you, but they hadn’t, so that must count for something. Instead of overthinking it, you threw caution to the wind and quieted your rational side. _‘Just say yes.’_

“Sure, I’ll, um, I’ll stay. Thank you for having me?”

“YAY! NOW YOU CAN HELP ME FIND THE ‘EDIBLE’ GLITTER. WE CAN EVEN HAVE A SLEEPOVER IN MY ROOM!” Sans seemed to immediately take offense to that, but you didn’t notice. “Right now?”

“YES! I WANNA SHOW YOU ALL OF MY ACTION FIGURES!”

You smiled and clasped your hands together. “Oh, cool! I used to collect them, too.”

“AH, A WOMAN OF CULTURE.”

Sans laid out his hand for you to take again. “here, i’ll help you up, it’s been a long day. his room’s to the left. don’t stay too late.” You reached for his hands, gently rocking forward in anticipation of Sans pulling you up. “Oh, thank y---”

**PRRFFTTFTFTFTTTTTFTFTFTTFTTFTT..TTTTT..T…TT…t.t.t…..f..tt!**

Nobody said anything. Papyrus looked _exasperated_. On the other hand, you were shocked and extremely embarrassed. You didn’t even know you could get so red. And Sans had _such_ a shit eating grin. “the old whoopee cushion in the hand trick.”, he smirked, “i wasn’t able to do this the first time so let’s take it from the top. hi, i’m sans. sans the skeleton.”

You put your head in your hands for the second time today. “SANS, SHE’S—” You couldn’t keep it in anymore. “Really, Sans?” Laughter and tears poured out of you. Of all the things that you didn’t expect today, this had been the most pleasant. You weren’t a kid anymore, but you kept thinking about how loud the fart sound was and could not stop laughing. “I-it went like… PFFFTFFTTT!” Every time you thought you were done, you started laughing again. “I’m just REALLY glad that didn’t come from me. I almost died of embarrassment.” Sans shrugged and looked over to Papyrus with an expression that said, ‘see?’. Once you were able to quiet yourself down, you noticed something. You really had to pee.

Sans finally helped you up, sans the whoopee cushion in his hand. Standing up made you feel even worse. “Where’s your bathroom? I gotta go.”

“GO? GO WHERE?”

“To… the… bathroom…?”

“OO, WHAT’S IN THERE? BATHS?”

“Um… yeah? And sinks? And TOILETS? Do you guys not have a bath… oh. Skeletons… don’t have organs. Especially not bladders.”

“nope.”

“W-Where do you brush your teeth?”

“TEETH? I ONLY HAVE 8!”

“Wash your hands?”

“kitchen.”

“Do you all not bathe?”

“OUR BONES ARE SELF CLEANING! AND WE ONLY SWEAT FOR EMPHASIS.”

“Uh… huh. Well, if I don’t get to a bathroom soon, I will release liquid waste onto your floors. That is, um, a bad thing. For all of us. Collectively.”

“…OH.”


	5. Urine For It Now

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> whyyyyy do i only upload around 12am! sorry y'all, it's when i do my best work, haha.  
> one thing i love about writing this fic is being able to drop in little things from the game that i remember!  
> hopefully you all catch them as well! <3

Sans seemed to be in deep thought, while you were in deep dooodoo. _How_ were you going to stay here without a bathroom? “Do none of your friends have a bathroom? This is only kind of urgent.” Sans paced around the room then snapped his fingers. “grillby’s.”

“GRILLBY’S? WHY ARE YOU THINKING OF THAT DISGUSTING GREASETRAP RIGHT NOW? SHE COULD EXPLODE AT ANY MINUTE!”, Papyrus howled.

“grillbs has a bathroom.”

“BEHIND THE BAR, RIGHT? NOT THAT I WOULD KNOW, IT’S JUST THE MOST LOGICAL ANSWER.”

“Does that mean I don’t have to pee on your rug covered floors?”, you smirked. “that’s exactly what that means. c’mon, i’ll take you there.”

“OH GOODY! UNFORTUNATELY, I WILL NEVER TAKE A STEP INTO THAT PLACE WILLINGLY SO YOU TWO WILL HAVE TO GO ALONE. TOODLES!” Sans took up his keys and headed to the door, then stopped. “before we go, you might want to change into something warmer. papyrus might have something for ya.” You looked at Papyrus in response. “OH YES! I HAVE THE PERFECT THING FOR YOU!” Papyrus practically floated upstairs to his room, ruffled through what sounded like his closet, then slid back down stairs. “THIS!”

It was a blindingly bright rainbow striped sweatpants, just like your sweater! Way too big for you, though. “I’m not going to ask how or why you have these, but I love them.” You lovingly took them from Papyrus and sat back on the couch. You popped off your boots, put your legs through the huge leg holes and used the drawstring to tie it as tight as you could on your waist. “Ta-daaaa.”

“looks good.”

“NO, LOOKS GREAT!”, Papyrus shouted.

“Thank you, I really enjoy looking like a human pack of Skittles.” You hurriedly put your boots back on and adjusted your (well, Sans) jacket, zipping it up to your chin. “Let’s roll.”

* * *

Snowdin was exactly how it sounded, snowed in. It was extremely cold, and everything was slippery. You were thankful for your newly acquired pants. Despite your internal clock telling you it had to be late at night, the Underground was still as bright as you saw it this afternoon. Rubbing your arms for warmth, you looked up at where the moon should be. This was really a sad life these monsters lived.

“it’s just past the library. go ahead of me. i’ll be able to keep an eyesocket out for ya back here.”

“Sans, please, no puns!”, you giggled. “Let me get to the bathroom first.”

You didn’t object to him asking you to walk in front of him, even though it wasn’t entirely for good reasons. He needed to keep an eye on you at all times. Papyrus was easily trusting of monsters and humans alike, immediately accepting of you into their house, and into his room. And while that was a great trait to have, it got him into a lot of trouble. Thank God Sans was always there when Papyrus needed him, whether he knew it or not.

Wow, was his mind literally always on Papyrus? That’s kind of sad, he thought. Even with how many jobs he got to fill up his time, his mind always drifted back to his brother. But if he wasn’t working, obsessing over his brother’s health, or sleeping, he’d be terribly alone with his thoughts and he knew that. And you.. you. Yet another thing to keep him on is toes. Another.. surprise. He felt those depressing, obsessive thoughts creeping up on him and he couldn’t stop them. The silence between you two allowed them to fester. Sans opened his mouth to speak but lost his will.

It wasn’t worth it.

“Oooo, Sans, is this Grillby’s?”

This was different. You were different. But happy endings didn’t exist.

“Sans. Grillby’s, is this?”

Sans closed his eyes for a minute, gathering himself. “ _not this time, please_.” You turned around to Sans after hearing what you thought was a whisper. Maybe you were mistaken, but your skeleton friend looked.. troubled. “SANS!”

“huh?”

“Are you.. okay? Is the cold getting to you? Because honestly… I thought it’d GO RIGHT THROUGH YA!” You were trying to suppress your giggles but failed. “Y’know, ‘cause you’re a skeleton. And have no skin. Like, none.”

He was taken aback by the joke but decided to emote in some way at least, lest it’d tip you off that something was wrong with him.

“good one, kid.”, he said, letting out a breath. “let’s get going.”

You reached to open the door, but Sans caught it before you and let you inside. At least his thoughts were quiet, for now.

* * *

Grillby’s was so cool. They really had a whole restaurant down here! And it had a _jukebox_! “Do you know how old these things are? These were popular in the 1950’s! That was… almost 70 years ago. Gosh, have you guys really been down here that long?” The jukebox was a little dusty, covering your fingers in a thick, dark layer of dirt. “Ugh, broken. I’ve never seen one in real life. I wonder what music it would have played, y’know?”

“i thought you had to use the bathroom?”

“The sheer excitement of seeing this American relic quelled my bladder.”

“heh. you’ll have to wait for grillby anyways. the bathroom’s over there but only fires can go through the fire exit.”

“…Huh?” As if on cue, a tall, elemental monster emerged from the back room. You see why he was called Grillby. He’s what spontaneous human combustion would look like if humans lived instead of burning to death. The fire monster had his head down, cleaning a glass, only looking up in shock that someone was here this late. “sup, grillbs?”

He said nothing back but shot Sans a look of confusion while adjusting his glasses. How did his glasses stay on his face? You didn’t think he had a nose. Even though you were a few feet away from him by the jukebox, you could still feel his flames. “Woah… you’re hot!”, you half-whispered as you fanned yourself. You swore you saw his flames waver a bit, but maybe there was a draft. Grillby cleared his throat and went back to cleaning the bar top.

“wow, you’re just gonna flirt with my best buddy right in front of me? i’m wounded.”

“Huh?” Then it clicked. “Oh, I-I’m _SO_ sorry! I meant it like, the heat way! Your flames are killer! Not… like that. N-NOT THAT YOU’RE NOT ATTRACTIVE. You’re very attractive. I MEAN.” There went that big, cheesy grin Sans had at times again. “LISTEN, GRILLBY… SIR. I’D JUST LIKE TO USE YOUR BATHROOM. THAT’S ALL.”

Despite lacking a mouth or eyebrows or even eyes, you could tell he was amused. He snorted, putting down his rag to lead you to the door. “Th-thank you.”, you said, slightly embarrassed. Grillby flashed you a ‘smile’ and then closed the door. Two raps on what sounded like wood caught Grillby’s attention. Sans motioned for Grillby to close the exit and come closer.

“so, what do you think?”

Grillby gave Sans a dramatically uninterested expression. “still mad at me, huh? or maybe you’re jealous i brought a girl with me? grillbs, i didn’t know you swung that way.” He sighed, a puff of smoke escaping from his ‘mouth’. Sans was his best customer and maybe even his closest friend, but he’d be lying if sometimes he didn’t want to smack him. But he loved his company, catered to his weird eating habits, and even would play dumb when Papyrus came in angrily asking if Sans came in that day. They got each other.

“before you ask, yes, she’s human. she’s also staying with us for the time being.”

Grillby’s flames crackled.

“crazy, right? but she’d die otherwise.” ‘ _and i have a promise to keep’_ , he thought to himself. “between what she fell down here wearing and the way she goes about things…” The thought of you hitting Flowey with a stick elicited a chuckle out of him. “yeah. she could stay at the inn but 80g a night is kinda steep.”

While putting away the glass he had been cleaning, he flashed Sans a look that said, ‘be careful’. “i know, i know, you don’t have to tell me twice. i would never let anything happen to pap.”

Sans and Grillby’s attention were caught by the footsteps coming towards the back door. You opened it and peeked inside. “Oh, were y’all talking? Sorry it took me so long, I couldn’t figure out how anything worked in there.” You made a face, thinking on how incompetent you felt just trying to wash your hands. Monster technology was way different than anything you’ve seen on the surface. “I’m ready to go though, if you are.”

“you don’t want anything to eat? i’ll pay. well, it’ll be on my tab.”

You saw the face Grillby made and snickered. “Nah. See, I’m hungry, but after that spaghetti…” Sans smirked. “grilbs, toss her a snack.” Grillby grabbed a bag of chips and tossed them to you. “Ah!” Fortunately, you caught them before they hit you in the face. ‘Popato chisps?’

“we’ll come in the morning and get her something to eat.” Sans slipped off the barstool and waved to Grillby. “see ya tomorrow.” You decided to wave as well. “Bye, Grillby!” Your smile warmed Grillby’s heart, though you’re sure it didn’t need to be any hotter. He gave you a little wave back and continued to clean and rearrange his drinking glasses.

“A man of little words, huh?”, you asked. Sans raised an eyesocket. “grillbs? yeah, he’s flameous for being a quiet guy.” It took you a second, but you got the little pun he attempted. “I’d laugh if I wasn’t so tired. I’m ready to sleep for seven thousand years.”, you said in-between loud, ‘unladylike’ yawns. “I got the couch, right?”

“unless you wanna sleep in the human capture zone.”

You blinked. “The what?”

Sans lead you passed the house and before a huge shed next to it. Upon going inside, the stench of stale air and kibble hit your nose like a firetruck. A lone little doggy bed laid in a corner behind the wide spaced bars that were set up. ‘ _This has gotta be Papyrus’ doing_.’ You decided to pass. “this is where papyrus would have taken you if i didn’t say anything. looks inviting, huh?”

“Sans, I would rather eat another plate of spaghetti than sleep in here.” The deadpan tone in your voice and look on your face let Sans know you really were serious. He closed his eyes and smiled, trying to hold in his laughter. “suit yourself.”

“HUMAN, YOU’RE BACK! YOU BOTH SURPRISINGLY DON’T SMELL LIKE GREASE.”

“grillby’s was empty tonight.”

“AS IT SHOULD BE.” Papyrus quickly turned from Sans and beamed at you. “ARE YOU READY TO REENACT BATTLE SCENARIOS WITH ME?”

“I’d love to but I’m really tired. All I want to do is hit the couch tonight. Sorry, Pap.” You rubbed your eyes and tried to stifle yet another yawn. “Maybe tomorrow?”

“NONSENSE! THERE’S NO NEED TO APOLOGIZE!” While Papyrus didn’t seem to be the type to know about personal space, you weren’t expecting this. He picked you up bridal style and carried you to the couch. “YOU’VE HAD A LONG TRIP. LITERALLY. I MAY NOT KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT HUMANS, BUT I DO KNOW THEY NEED SLEEP.” He tucked you in like a mother would a child. You didn’t even fight it, you were glad you didn’t have to walk those extra steps to couch or having to go find a comforter on your own. “WANT ME TO READ YOU A BED TIME STORY? I CAN GO GET MY FAVORITE, ‘PEEK-A-BOO WITH FLUFFY BUNNY’. THE ENDING ALWAYS GETS ME.” You were so tired that all you could do was nod ‘no’. “I’ll be okay. Thank you, though.”

“WELL… OKAY. IF YOU NEED ANYTHING, YODEL!” Papyrus made his way up the stairs and into his room. He took one last look at you, then closed his door for the night. _‘Wish I could have seen the action figures at least.’_ But at least you had these chips.

Sans emerged from the kitchen holding a dessert, then turned off the light. “you okay?” You nodded, face stuffed with potato chips. “Mhm! After these I’ll go to bed.” You reached for another chip then realized you still had his jacket on. “Oh, wait!”, you yelled a tad too loudly. “Here’s your jacket. I’m warm enough right now with these cool new pants, so.” You peeled off the jacket then noticed you needed to adjust your crop top. It had risen a little, showing off a peek of your bra. ‘ _PLEASE DON’T NOTICE_.’, you yelled in your mind. He took the jacket from you without a word, but you could see a hint of mischief on his face. “oh thanks for remembering. you’re the breast.”

You quickly sealed the bag of chips to preserve the ones you didn’t eat, and turned over in the couch, embarrassed. “Goodnight, Sans.”

Even though you couldn’t see it, you know Sans had that huge grin on his face. You heard him slowly walk upstairs, shuffle to his room, open the door, then stop.

“…goodnight.”

He went in and shut it quietly. Immediately, his face fell, his shoulders slumped, and he felt heavier than usual. The food he took didn’t even seem appealing anymore. He set it down near his bedside and laughed.

“this isn’t going to be easy,

is it?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well this is angstier than i bargained for. i swear this fic won't be too sad lmfao. sans is just tired, okay! next chapter might be a little heartwrenching though, but with someone we've only seen in one chapter! hmmmm. 👀


	6. First Day Out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i spent these days redoing outlines for this story! i pushed back the chapter i said i was going to do, until maybeeee.. chapter 10 or so. so enjoy some more bone brothers abode and an unlikely guest! :^) (or maybe two, oooo)

Something was tickling your nose. Still half asleep, you scratched your nose and turned away from whatever could have been bothering it. You repositioned your arms under your head, getting comfortable enough to drift back off to sleep. Again, you felt something tickle you. “Stoooop..”, you breathily moaned.

You guessed it was one of your parents being annoying, or maybe even your best friend who came over for breakfast sometimes. But you were tired, though from what, you couldn’t remember. You needed another five minutes.

Whatever it was obviously wasn’t backing down and started moving towards your legs. You felt a particularly hairy ‘hand’ graze against your leg. And you heard… panting. Immediately, you snatched your legs towards you and squealed. “What are y—”

_‘Wha..?’_ As you became more awake, mostly due to panic, you finally laid your eyes on your assailant: a small, white fluffy… dog. Its eyes widened in confusion. And it ran. Fast. You kicked off the covers and ran into the kitchen, almost losing your balance from getting up so fast. Standing at the entrance of the kitchen, you looked around, baffled. The dog you were chasing after was… gone.

There was no trace of it. You looked around the kitchen, besides the counter, in the trash, and even behind the fridge. Nothing. Looking around made you slowly realize that this wasn’t your house. That wasn’t your couch, this wasn’t your kitchen, and that certainly wasn’t your dog. One night’s sleep made you forget the situation you were in. All the memories of yesterday came flooding back, but this time you were prepared for them. Being so preoccupied by your weird wakeup and meddling memories, you didn’t hear the footsteps behind you.

“what are you doing?”

Startled, you turned on your heels. “Sans! Oh, I was...”, you trailed off. Should you lie right now? You didn’t want to say you were chasing a dog you probably hallucinated. “…getting some water. I was about to open the fridge then felt a little dizzy.” You hoped your lie didn’t seem obvious and that if it did, he didn’t think you were trying to do anything creepy. He placed a half-eaten piece of cake in the trash, then walked passed you to open up the fridge for himself. He kissed his teeth. “seems we just ran out.”

“Where do you usually get your water from?”, you asked.

“the lake.”

You scrunched your face up. “The… lake?” Sans seemed amused by your expression. “no, we get them from bunnibel, the shopkeeper a little way away from here, near the big sign. i really need to go shopping but i’ll do that after i take you to grillby’s.”

“Oh, Grillby’s! I forg—” A door upstairs slammed open, frightening you but seemingly not bothering Sans.

“DID SOMEONE SAY SHOPPING?”

Papyrus raced down the stairs, only stopping not to knock into the wall. “SANS, THERE YOU ARE! GOOD MORNING, BROTHER!” Papyrus picked up Sans as if he weighed nothing, twirling him around like a ragdoll. He planted a kiss (well, more like a skull to skull nuzzle) on the side of his brother’s head before putting him down. “morning, pap.” Papyrus saw you standing there in the middle of the kitchen, slightly lost. “HUMAN! GOOD MORNING TO YOU AS WELL!” You braced yourself for the hug and twirl, but only felt a gloved hand pat you on the head. You felt slightly disappointed, but it was understandable.

As you sulked, you felt that same gloved hand pick you up by the torso, kind of like a toddler. “HOW ARE YOU?” You were red-faced. “P-papyrus, good morning. You, um, you don’t have to hold me like this to talk to me. You’re only about a foot taller. But I appreciate the enthusiasm.” Papyrus realized his mistake and put you back down. “S-SORRY! IT’S JUST… SOMETIMES... YOU SEEM LIKE… YOU ARE… A LOT… SHORTER?” A lot shorter? For as long as you can remember, you’ve always been kind of tall. And it’s not like Papyrus knew you when you were a kid, anyway. You raised an eyebrow in 

“ANYWAYS, WHY ARE YOU ALL UP SO EARLY? ESPECIALLY YOU, SANS! YOU’RE NEVER UP AT THIS HOUR!”, Papyrus said with a huff. Sans smiled it off and took his keys out of his short’s left pocket. “i have to take the human to grillby’s for breakfast.” Sans headed towards the door, but Papyrus stopped him. “BUT THE HUMAN WAS SUPPOSED TO HELP ME FIND THE EDIBLE GLITTER TODAY!” You were? That was news to you. He really remembered you saying yes to something so simple. How cute. “you both can do that after. grillby’s is having a special today. bring one human, get a burger free.”

“REALLY?”

“No,”, you snorted, “I’m just gonna get breakfast then we’ll be right back! We can get the glitter and new ingredients for another pot of spaghetti after, maybe? Oh, and I can see your action figures, too!” Papyrus blushed, tears forming at his eye sockets. “YOU REMEMBERED!” You did a peace sign and posed. “Of course!”

It was easy for you to match Papyrus’ energy and weirdness. He was totally your type of guy friend. Sans, too. Both of them had really fun personalities. Polar opposites, but they complemented each other well, and complemented you, too.

“c’mon, the deal might expire if we don’t hurry.”, Sans snickered. You rolled your eyes. “Alright, alright.” You quickly popped back on your boots and adjusted your purse and pants. Oh, and you quickly detangled your hair with your fingers. Can’t go out with bedhead.

“let’s roll.”

You snapped your fingers in frustration. “Aw, I wanted to say it.”

* * *

Another walk to Grillby’s. Another day in the Underground. Sans walked by your side, hands in his pockets. At times, you swore you saw him look at you, but you could never catch it in time. After about the fourth time of you trying to meet his gaze and failing, you heard a low laugh. “aren’t you cold without my jacket?” Is that why he kept looking at you? “I’m fine, actually! It’s surprisingly warmish”, you admitted in between a yawn, “or as warm as it’s gonna get, really.”

A red, jester-y looking monster with crosses for eyes, and a short, mouse monster with a huge scarf were coming up on your right near Grillby’s. They were simply conversing with each other, until you heard a whisper in an unknown tongue, and both looked straight at you. You knew you were the odd one out in this place, but they didn’t need to make it so obvious. Instead of shrinking back, you decided to smile as you passed.

“Good morning!”, you bleated out awkwardly. It came out a little faster than you hoped, but you still flashed a smile and gave a wave. Both monsters were surprised that you would even attempt to talk to them. The nacarat jester gave a fast wave. “H-hello!” The mouse lazily flicked their ear at you instead of using their hands. “Morning…” Sans lifted an invisible hat from his head and winked. “top of the morning to ya.” The jester giggled while the mouse grumbled something about “jokes and modern crises”. He put one hand back in the pocket of his jacket, keeping one out to reach for the door before you could _again_.

“It’s a nice gesture, but you know I can open doors, right? Or is it monster activated?”, you teased. “can a skeleton just be hospitable and chivalrous to his human friend?”

“No.”

“oh, well.” He opened the door and bowed. “after you.” You jokingly gave him the ‘I’m watching you’ gesture with two fingers and stepped inside.

_‘yeah, i sure am, too.’_

Grillby’s was packed. There were so many monsters you’ve never seen before! A dizzy bunny, a Venus flytrap, a fish, a bird, a _horse_ , and an assortment of fluffy… white… dogs. And interestingly enough, Sans knew them all.

“hey, everyone.”

All the dogs, save for one playing cards near the back room, perked up to look at Sans. “Hi, Sans!”, a female voice barked in your general direction. She held her partner’s hand and wagged her tail, awaiting their reply. This time, a gruff voice came from the hooded figure. “Hey, Sans.”

The other dogs must have been nonverbal as they just wagged their tails as a reply. The monster reminiscent of a piranha plant spoke up in an unusually quiet and refined voice. “Greetings, Sans.” The monster sniffed the air. “And… company?” You flinched. “no need to worry, that’s just a buddy of mine with me.”

A belligerent bunny person hit the table, startling half the restaurant. “A BUDDY? Sansyyyy, you never bring anyone here! If you’re taken, then.. then… THAT’S ONE LESS SINGLE HOT GUY IN THE UNDERGROUND!!!” ‘ _Jeez_ ’, you thought, ‘ _how drunk could someone be this early_?’ The big mouthed monster cleared its throat. “Don’t worry about them, they’ve had a rough night.” The bun rolled over onto the table. You giggled at Sans’ admirer, but Sans just seemed embarrassed. You could hear an angry drunken moan as you and Sans took the last two seats available at Grillby’s bar.

“so, whaddya want?” You took a menu from the tabletop. “Mm, a burger, maybe?”, you said, pointing to the one that sounded the best. “No pickles though, please.” Sans clapped his hands together. “sounds good. grillby, we’ll have a double order of burg. you know my favorite.” Grillby nodded and slipped away into the back room to make the food. You were left alone with Sans until then.

“so..”

“So?”

“what do you think of my brother?”

The question took you by surprise. Despite asking such an innocuous question, something told you he was very serious. So you just answered in the only way you knew how. “Seeing as though I’ve only known him for a day or so, I think he’s pretty… cool?” You suddenly felt a little shy being interrogated like that.

“of course he's cool. you'd be cool too if you wore that outfit every day. he'd only take that thing off if he absolutely had to. oh well. at least he washes it. and by that i mean he wears it in the shower. undyne has told me stories.” His last lines caused you to titter. “He what?” Sans closed his eyes and exhaled. “listen…”

Before Sans could continue his story, Grillby came through with two plates of burgers and a bottle of ketchup. He set them down before you both, then proceeded to continue cleaning his cups. “oh, here comes the grub.” Sans picked up the ketchup bottle then stopped himself. “want some ketchup before i use it?” You shook your head. “No thanks. This has mayo on it.” He winked. “more for me.” You picked up the bun to check for pickles. “It’s just ketchup—”, you joked, turning your head to catch a glimpse of the weirdest thing you’ve seen in the last 24 hours.

He downed the bottle of ketchup like a cup of water. And from what you saw, it didn’t seep out of him like it should have. You knew Sans probably betted on you saying something, so you didn’t. You took a deep breath in, rubbed your temples, then reached for your burger. Sometimes you forgot how different this place really was.

Behind you, a bell jingled. The front door to Grillby’s place was being entered by yet another monster most likely. Shuffling, metal clanking, and whines made you want to turn around and look, but you kept your eyes on your own food. The presumably male hooded figure from before spoke up. “M-ma’am, we were j—”, he sputtered out. A new, Darth Vader sounding monster stopped him.

“It’s alright, I’m just here for cheese fries after a quick solo training session. At ease.” You looked to the side of you, only being able to see the huge armor-clad dog relax. You could have sworn you heard Sans mutter “dammit” under his breath. Heavy footsteps grew louder and louder until they stopped right beside you. “Hey, Grillby.”, they said. “Oh, and hey Sans. And hey… you?”

This new armor-clad person took off their helmet. ‘They’ was a.. ‘she’. Some sort of rugged amphibious fish-like woman, with gills, bright blue skin, an eyepatch, and protruding, sharp teeth. While this is exactly the type of character you’d romance in a video game, seeing someone like her up close was terrifying. She was easily Papyrus’ height, and she wore an eyepatch for God’s sake. Obviously, she was no stranger to pain, whether dishing it out or taking it. Her helmet was set down with such force it made even Grillby back away from his own bar.

She snarled and put her hand a little too close to your burger.

“Who are YOU?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> is the jig up for our dear reader? she hasn't even made it to waterfall yet! ya take one bite of your burger and suddenly you have to beat up a fish. monsters, i tell ya


	7. NGAHHHIII Guess Not

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> two chapters in a week! i'm on a roll!! oh, and did i mention i made a blog for this fic? i totally forgot!! [ https://homesickhuman.tumblr.com/ ]
> 
> if you'd like to send an ask or submit whatever, go ahead! i was thinking of drawing the reader and sans, papyrus, etc. to show roughly how tall everybody is in relation to each other. let me know if y'all would like to see it, if so, it'll be posted to that blog! :-)

You swallowed the last bite of your food and calmly put down your burger. Everyone was staring at you, some with concern, and some with suspicion. You remembered what Toriel, Sans, and even Papyrus had said. Monsters will want to fight you, solely because you are human. This is no time to be a truth teller. Time to lie your ass off.

“I’m just your ordinary, everyday monster girl!”, you said in some vaguely British accent. “Please, do not hurt me, uh..”

You heard Sans come closer and whisper. “undyne.” 

“..Undyne!” **_UNDYNE_**? This is who Sans and Papyrus kept mentioning? You just couldn’t imagine Papyrus hanging out with someone like this, until you remembered his personality. Super caring, silly, cute. Yeah, he probably accidentally became her friend and the friendship just stuck.

Undyne sneered, showing off a few more of her crooked, sharp chompers. “And where are you from?”

“A ways away from here at, near the um, uh…”

“the core.”

“The Core!” The core of what? You didn’t even know. You prayed she wouldn’t call you out on your bluff. “Oh yeah?”, she barked, “then what kind of monster are you? I’ve never seen you around and it’s my duty to keep tabs on peculiar ones like you.” She narrowed her stark yellow eye as she moved closer to get a better look at you.

You blurted out the first animal you thought of. “I’m… a cat.”

“A cat? With no fur? And no ears?”, she snapped. “L-listen, I’m a Sphnyx, alright!” You covered your nonexistent feline ears. “I don’t ask you about your eyepatch!”

Everyone in the restaurant gasped. Undyne was slightly taken aback, but when she gathered herself, oh was she furious. She summoned a blue, glowing spear, debating on if she should point it at you or not. You flinched. Even though you knew she could _probably_ kill you, you had faith that it at least wouldn’t happen here, in front of everyone. You had to figure out a way to end this. She was some sort of a knight, right? Hopefully this bluff worked.

“I don’t think he would appreciate this kind of discrimination and humiliation you’ve inflicted upon me.”, you said snobbishly. Undyne hissed. “He. Who.” You stealthily put your hand on Sans lap and tapped him. “King name, king name!” Sans coughed, “asgore”.

“ ** _ASGORE_**!”

The entire restaurant was so silent you could hear a pin drop. You had on an unreadable poker face but really, you were screaming internally. She clenched her left fist, somehow breaking the spear in her right hand. As much as you were sure she wanted to punch you with it, she lowered her fist. “My… apologies.” And she walked away, just like that.

Everyone was stunned and unsure of what to do. Even Grillby didn’t have any control over the situation. The female hooded figure yelled after her, “Where are you going, m-ma’am?” Undyne tensed her shoulders. “Back.. to training.”, she hissed through gritted teeth. “Don’t follow me.” Through the window panes, you watched her walk presumably back to her home in the next town over.

Everything was still a little tense. Now instead of relaxed ambiance and gentle murmuring, whatever conversations that were being had had to be about you. You looked at Grillby and Sans wide eyed, mouthing “that worked?” They returned the same sentiment.

“wow, kid. i’m not sure if you’re _off the hook_ or if you’re _reel_ ly in for it now.” You let out an exasperated sigh. “Do you have any more human hating friends I should know about?” Sans sighed as well. “we don’t hate you. or at least, we don’t want to. we just want to get out of here. and our only hope is… well, through you. or maybe more like, in you.” Grillby nodded solemnly. “but i believe in you. grillbs does too.” Grillby chucked up a thumb and wink, which you mirrored.

“Well, I’m not dying, first of all”, you scoffed. “I’ll break the barrier or whatever with my huge, pulsating muscles.” Sans slapped his forearm. “wish i could relate.” While you, Grillby, and Sans laughed at his silly joke, a phone close by rang. It sounded like an office telephone. “hold on.” Sans tapped his fingers on the bar top. “hey, pap. yeah, we’re still at grillby’s. yes, she’s fine. what about undyne? she’s upset? oh. don’t cry, i’m sure she’s fine. that sucks, but there’s always next week. that’s im _pasta_ ble. heh. y’know, i’m sure she could teach you. mhm. yeah. i’ll ask.”

Sans covered the receiver and turned to you. “now that undyne’s upset, she canceled her and pap’s training. wanna take over as teacher for the day? don’t worry, literally all they do is make pasta. i think it’d make him really happy.” You smiled. “Oh, sure! You were gonna go shopping anyways, I’ll come with and get the right stuff, then we can start.”, you replied. “great.” He let go of the receiver and told Papyrus you’d be happy to and that you both were coming to pick him up to shop for the ingredients. You could hear a loud “YEEHAW” on the other end of the receiver.

* * *

“Welcome! How can I help… you?” Snowdin’s only shopkeeper was surprised to see both of the bone brothers together. Papyrus came here frequently on his own, never bringing his brother or his friends. Sans was a ‘new’ face, but you were a sight! “Hi! Umm, I’m looking for pasta noodles.”

“OF THE SPAGHETTI VARIETY!”, Papyrus hollered. You chuckled. “And a few other things.” The bunny woman, or Bunnibel as Sans called her, took you throughout her shop to collect the things you needed. Onions, tomatoes, beef, pepper, garlic, sugar… oh, and glitter! You tapped her on the shoulder. “Do you by chance have edible glitter? Emphasis on edible.” Bunnibel crossed her arms in thought. “Mm, no. The only glitter I have here is for my sister’s kid’s crafts. I keep telling Papyrus it’s for art, not for eatin’!” Papyrus scratched the back of his head sheepishly. “NO ONE’S COMPLAINED BEFORE! BUT SHE CAN’T EAT IT BECAUSE SHE’S HU—” Sans stepped in. “hurt. she’s hurt. she’s not feeling too well and i don’t think glitter is the best thing for an upset stomach.”

Bunnibel uncrossed her arms and tapped her face. “Oh! Hold on, I got somethin’ for that.” She went in the back and walked out with a small pastry. “Here! One cinnamon bunny, on the house. It’s my own recipe.” It was hand sized, but smelled so good your mouth started to water. All you could do was whisper, “thank you”.

The three of you put all of the merchandise on the table top for payment, and you snuck in an extra bag of popato chisps for yourself. Sans didn’t even wait to hear the total, he just pulled out a wad of cash from his pocket and told her to keep the change. On the way home, you walked side by side, with Papyrus on your left and Sans to your right. There were a few monsters on your way back, but they all seemed preoccupied with their own errands. “I CAN’T WAIT FOR OUR TRAINING!”, Papyrus squealed. “Me, too!”

In the kitchen, Papyrus helped you place all the ingredients needed for your saucy pasta on the counter. “Papyrus?”, you called. “YES?” You set out the tomatoes in a line. “Can you get some pots and utensils for me? I gotta try to remember how to make the sauce from scratch.” Papyrus nodded. “ALRIGHTY!” You felt something solid press up against your back. Papyrus was retrieving the pots from the cupboards above the counter that was right in front of you. You mentally smacked your forehead. _‘Duh, why wouldn’t they be there?_ ’ Even though you knew he meant nothing by it, a small blush crept up on your cheeks, but you shook it off.

He set down the pot besides you, then moved to fetch a big spoon from one of the drawers. “READY!”

“Well, let’s get to it!”

“COOKING: START!”

* * *

A dish that should have taken 30 minutes took you at least an hour, maybe even two. Which wasn’t a problem for you since it seemed Papyrus was truly eager to learn. You may have had to stop him from smashing the crap out of the tomatoes on more than one occasion, but it was fun teaching him. “OIL? IN THE WATER?”, he asked. “Yeah! It keeps the noodles from sticking together.” His eyes bulged. “THEY’RE NOT SUPPOSED TO DO THAT???”

He really seemed amazed by everything you did. Just the act of sprinkling the sugar into the bowl of sauce and meat made him clap and holler. “So, I have to cook this separately from that. Can you put the noodles in there for me?” Papyrus nodded happily and began breaking the noodles in half and putting them in the pot. Everything was going well until he started stirring them. “Uh, Papyrus?” He stopped his stirring to reply. “YES?”

“Why are you stirring it so fast?!” Pools of water were on the stove at this point. “UNDYNE SAYS THE MORE YOU STIR... THE BETTER IT IS!”, he yelled. ‘ _Oh boy_.’ You shuffled closer to his pot on the burner parallel from yours. “No, no, Pap. Just stir it like this.”

You showed him how to stir and swish the noodles around gently. “Water on the stove is bad, okay?” Papyrus bent down to get a better look at this ‘wild’, ‘new’ discovery. Putting his hand on the oven’s handle, the crook of his elbow accidentally hugged your waist. His armor once again pressed up against your back ever so slightly. “HMM…” This wasn’t exactly an intimate moment, you were just cooking pasta. But for some reason, you could feel your face heating up, and it wasn’t the stove’s fault.

“HUMAN, ARE YOU OKAY?” Papyrus turned to you, worried. “Oh, sorry, I just, um, dazed out a little bit.” You hurriedly took a noodle out of the pot and bit into it. “It’s ready!” You broke free from Papyrus’ unintentional hug from behind and turned to the sink, or at least to where you thought one would be. “..Where’s the sink?” Papyrus pointed at the tall structure you thought was a closet. “UP THERE! IMPRESSED? I INCREASED THE HEIGHT OF MY SINK.” You put down the pot of boiling hot water and noodles. “Yes, kind of, but I have to let the water out for the pasta”, you admitted, “or I can’t finish it.”

“OH! THAT’S FINE!!”, Papyrus said while bending down. “JUST GET ON MY SHOULDERS!” This didn’t sound like it would end well… but you obliged. You carefully got on Papyrus’ shoulders, making sure not to ruin his armor or somehow break his neck with your thighs. “ONE, TWO, _UP_!!” You were woefully unprepared for the amount of strength and speed Papyrus had while hoisting you up. “P-Papyrus!” Fortunately, you kept the pot still. “Get a liiiiittle closer to the sink for me.” He slowly made his way to the sink, attempting to keep you steady. Putting the pot on the sink counter, you tipped it, slowly letting the water out. “Whew, good! You can let me down now.” Without hesitating, he picked you up from his shoulders, bringing you over his head and onto the floor.

“Papyrus… you’re mad strong.”, you said in disbelief. Papyrus posed. “I AM THE GREAT PAPYRUS, NOT THE MEDIOCRE ONE.” 

The rest of your lesson went swimmingly. You transferred the meaty sauce into the noodle pot and let both cook for a bit. Both of you leaned against the counter and waited. But Papyrus looked a bit.. down trodden. “What’s wrong?”, you asked. “N-NOTHING!”

“Are you sure?”, you prodded.

“MHM, YES, UM… POSITIVE.”


	8. Showers And Spaghetti

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> shortish chapter! i was writing and kinda wrote two chapters in one so i split it apart! i might post the other half either later tonight or tomorrow! i think updating every wednesday or wed + sat sometimes might be my schedule now!

_‘If he doesn’t want to talk about it, then he doesn’t have to.’_

“Well, uh, alright! Just know I’m here for ya.”, you said, patting him on the shoulder. You turned around to check on the pot and caught a glimpse of something blue. Sans.

“GYEHHH! Jesus, dude, you’re gonna give me a heart attack!”, you said, turning back to the pot. “It’s pretty much done, want.. a… plate?”

Papyrus looked incredibly nervous while Sans’ face was hard to read. He always smiled but he seemed… different. You looked back and forth between the two, puzzled. “Yes, no, maybe so?” Sans grinned. “can you _pasta_ plate, please?”

You smiled back. “Sure!” You reached for the plates in the cupboard but touched a gloved hand instead. “I-I’LL SHARE IT OUT!!” You slowly put your hand back at your sides. “Well… alright. I’ll just… sit on the couch?” Papyrus hurriedly closed the cupboard, took the spoon up and shared you out a plate. “OH, YES! WE CAN ALL EAT SPAGHETTI AND WATCH TV! T-TOGETHER!”

You nodded. “Uh… huh. We sure can.”, you said, taking your plate and awkwardly walking to the couch to sit. You took a forkful of your food. ‘ _Just like mom used to make!_ ’ Sans and Papyrus filed out of the kitchen a couple minutes after you, plates in hand. “LET’S WATCH METTATON!”

“Met a ton? A ton of what?”, you asked. “NO, METTATON! HE’S THE UNDERGROUND’S SOLE ROBOTIC STAR! HE’S MY FAVORITE SEXY RECTANGLE!!” You paused. “A robot?” Papyrus turned on the TV to a show you never heard of. “Real Houserobots of Hotland?” You guessed monsters and humans weren’t so different after all. Whether underground or on the surface, trashy reality TV shows never strayed far behind. You much rather have watched the monster news or see what kind of cartoons they’d have down here, but you watched it without complaint. For Papyrus.

* * *

Papyrus was loving every part of this. You, on the other hand, were not entirely sure what you were watching. You turned to the side to give Sans the Knowing Look of Confusion™, but he was already fast asleep. His food had been eaten off with the plate balancing on the chair handle. You waved a hand in front of his face. “Saaaans..” No response. It was kind of cool to see him so relaxed. He wasn’t uptight or anything, but he was always... overly alert. Understandable seeing as though you were a complete stranger in his house, but still. You turned to your right to ask Papyrus, then stopped. _‘Papyrus speaks at 200 decibels at any given time_.’ His voice would _definitely_ wake him up.

Welp, it was all up to you then. While Papyrus was enthralled with yet another reality tv show episode, you tapped Sans’ hand. “Sans!” Still, no response. You scratched your head. _‘Where else should I touch him?’_ You didn’t want to seem too handsy. You also _really_ wanted to cup his cheeks like a baby, but you fended off those thoughts. Turning towards him while kneeling into the couch, you touched Sans shoulders. You loomed over him to shake him gently. “Saaans!” He lazily opened one eye halfway. You smiled smugly.

_“Finally.”_

That was a poor choice of words, apparently. For some reason, that triggered him. Both of his eyes shot open, scaring you. He grabbed his chest and threw out his hand, just narrowly missing your throat. “AGH!” Papyrus turned around just in time for you to fly backwards into his plate of spaghetti. It also knocked the remote from his hand, sending it sliding across the room floor and turning off the TV with it. For a quick second, you saw Sans eye flash blue.

It was completely silent besides Sans’ erratic breathing. He kept his left eye closed while grabbing his chest as if he were checking for something _. ‘Was he actually hurt, or..?’_ Papyrus took his eyes away from the tv remote to check on his brother. “ARE YOU OKAY, SANS…?” Both of you were really concerned, especially Papyrus. Papyrus only ever saw Sans’ two emotions: being silly and being sleepy. He never saw him clutching his chest in crippling fear before. He never saw Sans so unstable.

Sans stopped breathing as heavily and clumsily adjusted his jacket. “i was just startled, heh. _tibia_ honest i’m not sure how you startled me like that. i must be _bone_ tired.” Neither of you laughed. Sans hurriedly got up and put his plate in the sink then started for upstairs. “i’m… gonna go lay down. have fun, kiddos.”

***squeaaaak.. thud!***

Both of you just looked at each other. Papyrus tilted his plate away from you, trying to minimize the damage done to your clothes and the couch. “Oh God, sorry, I messed up your sweatpants! Ugh, and my favorite top, too..”, you mumbled. “I need a shower.” Papyrus kept staring at his plate, not really moving much. “I-it’s okay! I’ll clean up. But then I gotta find somewhere to shower, okay?” As you threw away the rest of the spaghetti and attempted to climb the heightened sink, you felt something hoist you up. “Oh, thanks, Pap.” Papyrus let you down and turned you around to him. “I THINK… I’M READY TO TALK NOW.”

“..Let me get my purse. We can talk as we walk.”

* * *

The snow cushioned Papyrus’ heavy steps. You patiently waited for Papyrus to speak up, but it didn’t seem like that was happening anytime soon. In the meanwhile, you noticed a few things you didn’t see before. _‘A librar(b)y?’_ You made a mental note to check it out sometime. Right beside it was a pathway to a huge lake or canal. You passed by the same two monsters, the jester and the mouse. You waved to them just like you did this morning, and they gave a wave right back.

Papyrus was still silent. He made a bunch of gestures as if he wanted to say something but had to take his thoughts back to the drawing board. As soon as Papyrus worked up the courage to talk about his feelings, you mistakenly cut him off. “AN INN! Bunnibel did mention something about her sister running something next door. C’mon!” You pulled Papyrus inside.

“Welcome! My name is Bunnilla and this is my little one, Lucky.” You heard a small ‘hello’ from behind the counter. “How may I help you today?” Resting your elbows on her desk, you sighed. “Uh, long story short I am sticky and smell like spaghetti. Is there any way I could take a quick shower in one of your rooms?” The rabbit receptionist tapped her pen against her forehead. “Mm, yes! I believe I have one room open. That’ll be 80G!” The look on your face alerted her that you were as broke as a joke. “...You don't even have 80G? Oh! You poor thing. I can only imagine what you've been through. One of the rooms upstairs to the left is empty. You can sleep there for free, okay?” You grabbed her hands and cried. “Thank you!”

As you walked upstairs with the room key, Bunnilla motioned for Papyrus to come closer. “Welcome, Papyrus! How may I help you today?” Papyrus looked slightly confused. “Are you not here for a room?” He shook his head and smiled. “NO, I’M HERE WITH THE HUMAN!” Bunnilla carefully looked over her shoulder. “A human…?” She blushed and covered her mouth. “And you… in the same room?! How scandalous!”

Papyrus settled himself down on the bed, while you headed for the shower. You actually weren’t expecting him to follow you upstairs but meh, he was harmless. “If you wanna talk, it’ll have to be before or after my shower since I won’t be able to hear you when the water’s running.” Papyrus was still lost in thought. “Alright, after then..? I’ll be right back.”

You couldn’t figure out why Papyrus was being so weird and distant. You hadn’t known him long, but he was loud and rowdy at _any_ time of the day. Literally 24/7. You even heard him laughing from his room all the way upstairs while on the couch last night. But today, right after you finished his spaghetti lesson, he seemed sad. You carefully took off your top, making sure to avoid the spaghetti stained parts of it. “What a mess…”, you whispered as you took off your sweatpants, revealing your original shorts underneath them. You were just about to take off your shorts when the bathroom door swung open, hitting the back wall with a resounding thud. “HUMAN, I’M 103% READY TO TALK NOW!”

“ARGRHGGHHH— Papyrus!”, you yelled as you tried to cover your top half. “Don’t you know how to knock?!” Papyrus looked abashed. “O-OH MY APOLOGIES.” He closed the door and knocked. Without even waiting for a reply, he burst through the door yet again, even louder than last time. “I’M 10 **4** % READY TO TALK NOW!” You gave him a look and breathed a sigh of defeat. “This can’t wait until after?” Papyrus shook his head ‘no’. You shrugged. “Well, alright.”, you said, motioning to the toilet near the tub, “Sit here while I shower. **No** peeking.”

“WHY?? YOUR BATTLE ARMOR LOOKS COOL!! QUITE IMPRACTICAL, BUT STYLISH.”, he reckoned. “My _who_?” …Did he mean your bra? You stepped behind the shower curtain and took off your clothes, laughing to yourself. “Here, hold these for me.” Papyrus took your spaghetti soiled clothes and held them with the utmost care. You turned on the shower head, taking a minute to bask in the warmth. The hot droplets of water felt fantastic on your skin. You peaked your head out of the shower curtain for a quick second. “Well, speak.”

Papyrus fidgeted.

“IT’S… SANS.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i love giving these NPCs names. bunnibel and bunnilla (and lucky!). i'm so original and also creative.


	9. Someone's Lying

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> two uploads today, woot! i also broke 1k hits! i feel cool now. sorry for all the POV changes, though! scene changes are usually signified by the line, but rarely does the POV change. fortunately, it's just from reader to sans to pap so nothing too drastic, but! hope ya like it!

“Sans?”, you repeated.

Papyrus nodded. “YES, SANS… A-AND UNDYNE TOO! THERE’S A LOT OF… THINGS. I’M JUST NOT SURE I SHOULD BE SPEAKING WITH YOU ABOUT THEM.”

“Papyrus. You scooped me up in the snow, took me to your house, invited me into your room, and now you’re sitting in the bathroom with me as I shower. I think we’re close enough for whatever this conversation is.” ‘ _Taking things slow does not exist down here’_ , you whispered to yourself.

“NO, NOT LIKE THAT! I KNOW WE ARE ALREADY VERY GOOD FRIENDS.”

“The bestest.”, you interjected. “THE BESTEST???”

“Papyrus, continue.”

“BUT, AS A HUMAN… WOULD YOU UNDERSTAND?”, he asked, allowing you to hear the uncertainty in his voice. You continued soaping up, making sure to scrub away the spaghetti pieces on your back. “Well, I can try. I still don’t understand everything… but I’m here. Explain to me what I don’t know, okay?”

Papyrus laid his hands on his lap. “OKAY, WELL…”

Papyrus went over the basics of the Underground. He told you about the five main ‘towns’: the Ruins, Snowdin (where you reside at the moment), Waterfall, Hotland, and the CORE. There was also the capital where the king lived, presumably alone. Hearing yet again that monsters were trapped down here because of humans made your heart ache. You had never heard or learned of monsters living with humans at any point in time. They were always taught as myths, as fiction. They were probably hoping monsters would die out down here, leaving no trace. What awful, awful people.

“WITH THAT BEING SAID, SANS… EVER SINCE YOU FELL DOWN HERE, HE’S BEEN ACTING SECRETIVE AND WEIRD. MORE THAN USUAL!!”

“Weird how?”, you inquired, briefly sticking your head out from the shower curtains. “A LITTLE BEFORE YOU CAME, HE’D NAP FOR 7 HOURS A NIGHT…” You lifted an eyebrow. “You mean sleep?”

“NO!! SKELETONS HARDLY NEED ‘SLEEP’. I SLEEP FOR FUN ONLY!!” You chuckled at him. No wonder he was so awake so far into the night the other night. If you lived on 2 hours of sleep each night, you’d be loopier than a truck full of hula hoops. “BUT NOW SANS DOESN’T SEEM TO SLEEP AT ALL! I CAN HEAR HIM SHUFFLING AROUND IN HIS ROOM AT ALL TIMES OF THE NIGHT.” You turned down the water pressure to hear Papyrus a little better. “AND HE WON’T TELL ME WHAT’S WRONG. HE THINKS I DON’T KNOW OR DON’T NEED TO KNOW… BUT I DO. I CARE!”

The love Papyrus had for his brother made you smile. He was that observant to notice changes in his brother’s sleeping habits, and cared so much he needed to talk to someone about it? If only you had someone like that. His observations seemed fairly correct, though. Something was wrong, but what? To you, this sounded like Sans had insomnia. Perhaps depression?

You finished rinsing off, thinking on what transpired just an hour or so ago. “Ah, Papyrus, can you hand me one of the towels?” Papyrus reached behind him and passed you one. After laxly drying yourself off, you wrapped the towel around your body, securing it by tucking a piece near your chest. You stepped out, moderately wet. “Does that usually happen to him, what happened today? Or do you think that’s all because of lack of sleep?”

“I DON’T… KNOW. I DON’T THINK SO. BUT SANS DOESN’T TELL ANYBODY ANYTHING. EVER.” You could see Papyrus was really hurt by Sans secrecy. You knew all siblings held secrets and that was normal, but to not tell your brother something seemingly so important? Something was off. You just you weren’t sure if it was your place to find out.

“Listen, Papyrus. Your brother seems to love you very much. That’s a fact. I think maybe he needs to work out some things with himself.” You purposely failed to mention anything about mental illness, Papyrus didn’t need anything else to worry about. “Next time, ask him what’s wrong. If he laughs it off, he’s not ready. Always let him know he can talk to you. Okay?”

Papyrus gave a bitter smile. “OKAY.” You dried your hair with one of the hand towels. “Now what about Undyne?” Papyrus blushed. “OH, NOTHING!! NOTHING AT ALL!! A-ARE YOU FINISHED WITH YOUR SHOWER????”, he yelled. Papyrus was really good at sounding like his sentences ended with many exclamation points and question marks. “Yeah I am, I just...”

“WHAT?”

You grimaced. “…I forgot clean clothes.”

* * *

Sans’ room door opened gently, the carpet quieting the push. A white eyelight scanned the hallway for any sign of life other than his own. “pap?”, he shouted. No response. He lazily looked over the stair railing hoping to find his brother and you still on the couch, happily eating spaghetti and watching Mettaton without him. But you both were gone, and the house was completely silent. If he had any blood, it would have ran ice cold.

Sans quickly shuffled to Papyrus room to open it. Sounds of laughter spilled from the door crack. Silly him, you both must have been surfing the Undernet or playing with his action figures. There was no need to worry! His smile lifted. “pap, i told you to…” But, somehow, you guys weren’t there, either. He felt himself start to shake. “calm down, calm down..”, Sans whispered to himself, attempting to get his emotions under control.

_‘i cannot have another episode.’_

Slowly, he made his way down the stairs. Television off, couch empty. Something vaguely child sized ran at full speed into the kitchen. Whatever it was sounded feral. Sans propelled himself forward only stopping to turn and make eye contact with whoever was in his kitchen. He was determined to finish what he couldn’t finish last time. “ _fr_ —”

**bark!**

Sans was dumbfounded and annoyed. Annoyed… with himself. A small, white, fluffy being pushed itself into a corner, afraid. It was a dog. His dog. Or, well, a dog he knew existed in his house and had no problems with. Its whining made Sans feel guilty, but it also grounded him, something he really needed right now. “if the dog is here, then..”, he said, turning his head to the pot of spaghetti left on the stove. It was still lukewarm. “heh. wrong timeline, sans.”, he pointed out, gritting his teeth. “again.”

He kneeled down, beckoning for the dog to come closer. “sorry, towbii.” The dog’s soft fur tickled his fingers as he pet it. “i’m really paranoid, aren’t i, boy?” Towbii panted in response to be scratched under the chin. Sans got up, dusted himself off, and picked up his keys.

“i need a walk. badly. grillbs, he… he always knows what to do.”

* * *

It felt like the entire inn was shaking. Papyrus ran down the stairs, startling Bunnilla and her son. “I’LL BE RIGHT BACK! THE HUMAN NEEDS CLOTHES AFTER I RUINED HERS.” Bunnilla gasped, clutching her pearls. “Oh dear... Papyrus, you’re growing up so fast! Does Sans know?” She had seen firsthand the kind of protective nature Sans had over Papyrus. This would never fly if he knew, she thought. “ABOUT THE HUMAN? OF COURSE! SHE STAYS WITH US. BUT I HAVE TO GO, SHE’S STILL UP THERE, WET. I HEARD HUMANS DIE FROM BEING MOIST FOR LONG PERIODS OF TIME. THEIR SKIN SLIPS OFF, I THINK. SO. TOODLES!!!” As Papyrus burst through the inn’s front doors headed for home, Bunnilla took the opportunity to fan her blushed face. “Young, interspecies love, huh..?”

Papyrus quickly arrived home, trying to be as quiet as possible for Sans’ sake. He speedily made his way into his room, itching to go through his closet. “MAYBE THE HUMAN COUD USE TH— NO, TOO BIG.” After a long time of looking, he eyed a sweater Santa got him years ago that he had grown out of, and a pair of extra tights he wore under his battle body. “PERFECT!” He ran out of his room with the clothes he picked for you in hand. Seeing Sans door still closed and no sight of him downstairs made him sigh. “I CAN’T BE SAD!”, he told himself while jumping over the stair case for no discernible reason. “THE HUMAN NEEDS ME.”

* * *

“’I don’t need no body’?”, you asked, lifting up the article of clothing. “YES. I GOT THE SWEATER FROM SANTA YEARS AGO AND APPARENTLY, HE SHARES THE SAME TERRIBLE HUMOR SANS DOES. BUT IT IS VERY COMFY, AT LEAST.” You pushed Papyrus out the bathroom door. “Alright, thank you, bone boy. Let me change!” First new underwear, then bra, then shorts? No, not yet. Tights. Then shorts. Sweater, skipping socks, then boots. You pulled your crossbody over your shoulder and styled your hair to your liking. Opening the door, you found Papyrus waiting on you like a puppy. He perked up when he saw you wearing his sweater. “YOU LOOK GREAT! AND YOUR LEGS ARE SO LONG… ALMOST LIKE METTATON’S!!!!” You weren’t sure how to respond to that seeing as how you had only seen this ‘Mettaton’ with one short stubby ‘leg’, but you took it as a compliment. “Thank you. I think. Ready to go?”

Papyrus stopped in thought. “AH, SO YOU ARE NOT GOING TO SLEEP HERE..?” You turned around, hand still reaching for the door knob. “Uh, no?” You suddenly felt really embarrassed. You just assumed it would be okay to go back home with them without even asking. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to overstay my welcome or anything..” Papyrus practically jumped at you, putting his huge gloved hands on your shoulders. “NO!! I JUST THOUGHT!! NO, I.. I LIKE… WHEN YOU ARE AROUND. SO, LET’S… GO HOME!!! TOGETHER!!”

His impromptu ‘confession’ made you giggle. You loved how he really tried to make you feel welcome. “Are you sure?”, you asked. “YES! OF COURSE! THE GREAT PAPYRUS NEVER LIES TO HIS FRIENDS!!” You smirked, making Papyrus sweat even more. “So you lie to people that aren’t your friends?”

“N-NEVER!!”

Walking downstairs, you waved at Bunnilla. “Bye, see ya ‘round!” For some reason, she wouldn’t meet your eyes and seemed very nervous. Her nervousness made you think she might have figured out you were a human, but the blush on her face implied something else. You opted to ignore whatever wild thoughts she was probably having. Outside, a short, sort of reptilian monster ran up to you, headbutting you in the back of the legs. “Yo!!”

You vaguely remembered passing this monster before, but they were playing soccer with some other kids. You squatted to be more eye level. “Hi!” The monster wagged its tail. “Yo yo!! You’re a kid too, right? I can tell 'cause you were wearing a striped shirt earlier!!” Your smile turned into a bit of a cringe. What kind of logic was that supposed to be? Adorable kid logic, you thought.

“But..”, they asked, “are you really a human?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for all the #ANGST, it's almost over! ..almost.  
> it definitely gets a bit more serious/emotional next chapter, sorry fluff lovers. <3  
> but it gets better!! or does it?


	10. People Trigger Sans Deeply

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a little longer than usual, but fun to write. it needs to be for what will *cough* transpire..
> 
> mentions of PTSD/triggers, just in case anyone needs a warning. :-)

“No—”

“ **YES**!!”

Both of you stared at each other, Papyrus in confusion, you in anger.

The little monster looked confused. “So, yes..?”

You jumped up and smooshed Papyrus’ face before he could get another word out. “No, I am not a human! I’m.. new. From the CORE!”, you said, most obviously lying.

“Oh, cool!! We never get any new kids around here… You should come to Snowdin again and play with me and my friends sometime!!”, they said, jumping up and kicking their little feet into the air. “I’m the BEST at soccer!” Even though you had passed this monster twice, you just now noticed they lacked any type of arms, not even shoulders. “I might not play but I’ll definitely come watch you, okay?”, you said cheerfully. The little monster turned red. “Okay!!”

A motherly voice rang out from somewhere in Snowdin. “M.K.! DINNER TIIIIIME!” Your new small monster friend perked up. “Ah, that’s my mom! Aww, I should really get home now, then.. See you!!” they said, shooting off into the direction of their mother’s voice. You waved as they ran away. “Aw, nice kid.” Before you could continue walking, Papyrus spoke up. “WHY DID YOU LIE TO THEM? THEY ARE JUST A KID.”

“Well… I wasn’t sure if they asked if I was a human because I ‘looked’ like one, or they asked because there could be rumors going around that I am one. I think it was the latter. The whole Undyne thing might have people talking about me still.” Papyrus stopped. “WHAT UNDYNE THING?” You kissed your teeth. ‘ _Shoot. Wrong skeleton_.’

“…It’s a long story.”

After Papyrus carefully unlocked the door, you plopped onto the couch. Papyrus came and sat next to you on the couch like a shy schoolgirl. “SO…” You smiled and rolled your eyes. “So.”

“I HAVE QUESTIONS TOO!! LIKE.. WHAT IS IT LIKE ON THE SURFACE?”

“Welllll..”, you said, gesturing vaguely into the sky. “There’s a sun. Roads. Uh, wind. Nothing as cool as the Underground, unfortunately.” Papyrus gasped. “THERE’S HOPE!!”

* * *

Papyrus began to tell you all about his dreams of the surface. He wanted to “drive down a big highway”, with the wind in his “hair”, sun on his “skin”, and the pedal to the metal. Unfortunately, he couldn’t do any of that, so he just cruised while he snoozed. He also wanted to become a top chef and own a cooking show like his ‘favorite sexy rectangle’ (or maybe _only_ sexy rectangle) Mettaton. Though, with the way his food tasted, you didn’t want to tell him there was a 11.38% chance of that happening.

But it was nice to see someone so full of hope and dreams. A lot of your friends had already lost that spark, probably because of the weight of student loans. Papyrus chatted away about all he had set in his mind to do when he was freed, and you injected in a few jokes, especially puns, at his expense.

As you both were laughed away, a door nearby squeaked open. You shot a glance up at Sans’ door, but it remained closed. The two of you turned to the only other door in the house, the front door. It was Sans. Wasn’t he in his room, asleep? The jovial atmosphere slowly died and was replaced by tension. Papyrus seemed quite overwhelmed, getting up to walk upstairs to his room without even a goodbye. While you were worried for him and his feelings, the other side of you screamed ‘ _PLEASE DON’T LEAVE ME WITH HIM, THIS IS VERY AWKWARD_.’ 

Sans just stood at the front door uncomfortably. He finally made eye contact with you and all you could give back was a faux smile. Awkward. “ _Heeeeeyyy_ yoooh, whatcha got there?” Sans held out a small bowl and spoon for you to take. “Ice… cream? Is this your way of saying sorry?” He was caught off guard by your bluntness and laughed. “heh. ya caught me. yeah, i.. i really apologize. for earlier.”

Popping a spoonful of the ice cream into your mouth, you raised an eyebrow. “Cookiedough?” Sans smiled. “puppydough. made by real pups.” You frowned thinking of all the pet hair that would have been in your ice cream if that really were true. “Ew. But yeah, I forgive you. It’s nothing I was totally hung up over. I’m more worried about _you_. Are you okay?”

“never better.”, he said, putting on a smile.

That was a total lie. You knew he wasn’t okay. And you knew it wasn’t your place to ask, but between these two boneheads, nothing would ever get addressed. He turned to start for the kitchen, with the same fake smile. “if you need me, i’ll be upstairs. enjoy, kid.”

No, this was the perfect time to test something. You didn’t want him to leave yet. Against your better judgement, you reached out for his hand, dragging him back onto the couch to speak with you. Just like earlier, his reflexes were crazy fast, but you were prepared this time.

Sans frantically turned clockwise, your hand still holding his. Time seemed slow. You were able to dodge his incoming grab and stand up, leaning into him. Your hand let go of his to wrap around his shoulders. He stiffened. All you could do was hold him tighter. “Sans. It’s okay.. to not be okay. Papyrus is worried about you. It might not mean much, but I’m worried about you as well.” The crook of your neck cradled the side of his skull. “Being afraid like that, reacting to normal things like that isn’t… normal. It’s okay to not be okay. It’s okay to get help. It’s okay to lean on others.”

You slowly let him go, his body still stunned. Vacant black eyeholes stared back at you. Was that normal? You leaned over, staring into them. “Sans..? Man, you don’t even have a pulse I could check. I think?” You delicately put two fingers against his neck vertebrae. Nothing. ‘ _Duh, I’m not sure why I thought that would work._ ’

Calling him again, you slowly moved your pointer finger near his sockets, curious on where his eyelights went. A bony hand blocked your path. “my chest, my hand, now my neck and eyes.. you’re a handsy human, y’know that?”

You snatched your hand back in surprise. “Sans! You’re okay! God, I thought I broke you. Wait, I never touched your chest, I only shook your shoulders.”

“oh, i know. i’m just _ribbin’_ ya.”

Popping another spoonful of ice cream into your mouth, you plopped back onto the couch. “Of course. If I didn’t care about your wellbeing, I would have booed you.” The far other end of the couch shifted under new weight. “why?” You raised your eyebrows. “Mm?”

“why do you care?”

“Why wouldn’t I? You’ve given me a place to stay, you’re nice, Pap’s nice too, your jokes are _terrible_ but exactly my kind of humor, oh, you’ve fed me, gave me clothes.. all for free, too. But I’m not doing this to pay you back. I’m doing this.. as a friend! And because it kinda seems I’m the only one who understands what’s wrong with you.”

“you do?”

“Mhm! You don’t have to tell me anything, but.. do you have PTSD, Sans?” He gave you a perplexed look. “Oh! You don’t know what that is. PTSD stands for ‘post traumatic stress disorder’. It happens after a, hm, traumatic event. Symptoms are always being on guard, being easily frightened, you might even have trouble sleeping.. Depression.. usually comes with it.” With every word that fell from your mouth, Sans seemed to get quieter and quieter. “If you need me to stop, I can.”

“no. it’s.. okay. go on.”

“Okay. A big thing that indicates PTSD is flashbacks. Reliving the event as if it were happening again, reacting to things that remind you of what happened.” He seemed a little uneasy, but still made an effort to absorb what you were saying. “So, let’s say something happened to you. Like, maybe you, uhhh..” You thought of something he could relate to. ‘ _A child comes into the underground, murders all your family and friends, and you have to live with it all!_ ’…is what you wanted to say.

For some awful reason.

You stared at your hands, confused about your own thoughts. Your brain felt like static. What kind of thoughts were those? You looked up to find Sans staring at you, waiting to continue. This was a conversation you needed to have with yourself at a later date.. but the thought of continuing was very off putting. You managed a little “let’s move on” as Sans eyes looked at you.. or more like, _through_ you.

“Anyways, I.. I’m not entirely sure of your trigger.. and I don’t want you to tell me anything if you aren’t comfortable. But..” You shifted in your seat, taking time to think. Papyrus had said sometime before you came, Sans started sleeping longer. Now that you’re here, he hardly sleeps. Both were unusual for him. Papyrus also mentioned he didn’t know if Sans was ever jumpy like this, meaning it could be normal, but most likely isn’t either. The two times he overreacted, he was touched. Was he somehow afraid of being touched? You shook your head. No, he was picked up by Papyrus this morning. Was he afraid of being touched by others? By… you? You turned to him. You now understood, even if it hurt.

“Sans.. are you afraid of **_me_**?”

It was completely silent for a few minutes, not even a TV playing for background noise. Instead of looking into your eyes, he looked off to the side, thinking.

“..papyrus.”

“Huh?”

“is.. he.. really worried about me?”

Your initial question was just ignored. And y’know what, that was okay. A soft smile graced your face in response. “Sans.. we all are. But if you don’t want me to mention this conversation with him.. I won’t. And if me being here is bothering you, I can leave.”

“don’t.”

Surprised, you asked ‘why’.

“papyrus would wonder why you were gone, go looking for you, and i’d never hear the end of it.” You scoffed. “Wrong! You love my spaghetti and you wouldn’t know what to do without me.” Sans relaxed, laughing. “nahhh, eating out is way cheaper. all those ingredients i bought ya cost a pretty _penne_.” The look on your face made him snort. “Maybe I _should_ leave.”

“says the person with a skeleton pun on her sweater. pap has one just like that, actually.”

“Oh, it is his! I had to change after.. y’know..”

“oh.. here, i’ll put ‘em in the wash for ya.”

You handed Sans your folded piles of clothes, putting one of your socks back on top. He headed for the door, eyes closed. “the washer and dryer are in the basement. i’ll be back in a bit.”

“Oh, thank you!”

“no, thank you. you’re alright, kid.”

You gave him finger guns and winked. “Anytime.”

As you got comfy on the couch, surfing through their channels and thinking on how you were ‘totally the Underground’s Dr. Phil’, Sans put your clothes in for a wash. He lingered in the basement for a bit, recollecting himself, thinking on what you just said. His face scrunched in response.

“ _none_ of this is familiar to me.. why...” A colored strand of something poked out from the white fluff of his jacket. He pulled it out, eyeing it. It was a strand of your hair. He rolled it around in his fingers, amusing himself with it. “maybe, maybe she’s.. good. maybe this _one_. _time_. it’ll work out.”

“maybe.. this time… everything will be okay.”

Your words swam around in his head.

_“It’s okay to not be okay.”_

“if that speech was to get me to let my guard down and make me easier to kill.. man.

she did a great job.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sans is warming up to you, now, finally! where will this go, what will you do???
> 
> probably fall asleep on their couch in the middle of 'How I Met Your Mettaton'.


	11. Small Shock

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IT'S BEEN MORE THAN A WEEK SINCE I UPDATED, SORRY GUYS!! i'll still most likely update wednesdays or saturdays or some fusion of the two, i just had a bit of a busy school week!!

Twas a morning in the Underground when all through the house, not a creature was stirring, not even a.. skeleton. It was _way_ too quiet.. You jolted awake, trying to survey your surroundings.. but couldn’t. Even though your eyes were open, it was still pitch black. You screamed. _OOOH MY **GOD** I’VE GONE BLIND AAAAAA— oh. There’s.. something on my face._ You snatched off whatever it was only to realize it was a series of sticky notes stuck together like some sort of kindergartner's caterpillar art project. Each sticky note had its own message.

> “going 2 wrk, sry 2 leave u by urself. left $$$ jic u want 2 buy breakfast. key on table. ur clothes r clean beside u. see u l8r”

Down besides the couch was your clothes from yesterday washed, dried, and folded neatly. On top was a small wad of bills, just like the note said. Directly under the money was something black and lacy. “GAH, I totally forgot that was in the pile! I-it doesn’t matter, I’m sure he’s washed Papyrus underwear before.” Your head fell in your hands. “I just had to wear something so.. L-let me just read the rest.”

> “HUMAN, IF YOU NEED ME, I’LL BE IN THE FOREST RECALIBRATING MY PUZZLES. FEEL FREE TO COME BY AND BE THOROUGHLY JAPED BY THE GREAT PAPYRUS!”

You flicked the note. “Ah, so he’s gone too, huh? It’s just me, myself and I today, I guess.” You expected the next message to be from Sans, but it was another from Papyrus.

> “SANS, YOUR SPELLING IS ATROCIOUS. PLEASE REWRITE IT SO THE HUMAN CAN UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU’RE SAYING.”
> 
> “*you’re”
> 
> “NO, ‘YOUR’ IS CORRECT. IF I SAID, ‘SANS, YOU’RE SPELLING IS ATROCIOUS’, IT WOULDN’T MAKE SENSE!! THERE’S NO REASON YOU SHOULDN’T KNOW THIS.”
> 
> “*their’s”
> 
> “THERE.. IS NO APOSTROPHE IN 'THEIRS'. AND 'THEIRS' WOULDN’T MAKE ANY SENSE EITHER!! WAIT.. SANS… ARE YOU **TROLLING** ME???”
> 
> “lel”

The rest was almost illegible from both parties. You looked over their handwriting again, giggling to yourself. “They have cute handwriting at least. Papyrus is so loud he even writes in all caps? And Sans is so lazy he doesn’t even capitalize sentences. Sans’ handwriting kinda reminds me of that one font no one likes, uhh, comic sans.” Realization slowly came over you. “Sans.. comic. Sans. He’s.. and, Papyrus..” You traced over the letters with your index finger. “..papyrus. Uh.” You felt a little unsettled. Was this a coincidence or just an elaborate joke? You touched your face and chest. “I’m real, that’s good.”, you sighed, getting up to stretch. “Hopefully their parents just had really ironic naming habits.”

* * *

With a quick look around to double check, you hurriedly put on your clothes from yesterday, sans the underwear you folded and put in your purse. As much as you loved your new punny sweater, you missed your top. Something about your crop top filled you with determination. And you looked cute to boot! As you were putting on your shorts you heard a loud rap at the door, making you trip and fall into the couch. _God, not now_ , you thought. You weren’t the owner of this house! You didn’t want to open doors for people the bone brothers were possibly avoiding. Another knock sent you spiraling. There was no peep hole on the door, so you looked through the blinds, slowly moving them open in order to not be seen. Someone you knew for all of 30 seconds was at the door.

Undyne.

“Sans? Open up, squirt, I know you’re in there. I saw your blinds move!! I have urgent business with the girl here.” Urgent business? What could she possibly want with you? Nothing good you were sure. The last time you saw her, you embarrassed her in front of her subordinates and random civilians. And how did she know you stayed here anyways? Well, it was nothing to ask that one jester or even Grillby, you guessed. Snowdin was a small town. But it still made you uneasy.

“Listen, nerd, ya got 10 seconds to open this door before a spear goes through it!! Ten! Nine!” You scrambled around like a headless chicken attempting to clothe yourself before opening the door. You saw her spears before, you can guess this wasn’t an empty threat.

“Six! Five!”

You patted down your hair and quickly rubbed your face for drool. “Three! Two! O— ha, gotcha! Now, where is she— oh.” You stood before her only looking slightly disheveled. “Just the cat I need to see!” She looked friendly, well, as friendly as a six foot five, snaggletoothed fish woman could look, so you joked back. “To what do I owe this wonderful visit?” Undyne’s smile fell into a more forlorn look. She brushed her silky, crimson bang from her face and leaned against the doorpost gently. “I actually came to.. apologize. For yesterday. You were right, Asgore would never have been happy with my behavior. The big lug cares for all monsters, big and small.” She cupped your chin, tilting your head back and moving your bottom lip gingerly to get a better view of your teeth. The close proximity of her face to yours threatened to reveal a blush on your cheeks. “You’re still the weirdest cat I ever saw. But just because I’ve never seen a cat monster like you, it doesn’t give me the right to treat you like that and embarrass you. I’m sorry.”

Shock was the only emotion you could muster. Undyne totally seemed like the hotheaded, hotblooded (or maybe coldblooded?) tyrannical type of leader. Her whole demeanor commanded attention, especially when she wore her armored helmet. “Plus, Papyrus would never lie to me!”, she bragged, “He didn’t even say a word to me about you being here and he’s a human hunting fanatic! Even tries harder than me. Well, he tries harder than everyone, but that’s what I love about the goober.” She put her arm around your shoulder and gave you a light noogie. “So you’re alright with me, Sphynxy!”

On the outside, you couldn't help being a little awestruck. On the inside, you were screaming internally. She really thought you were a cat monster still! And she… apologized! How the tables have turned in just a day. But, this seemed like bad news. What if she finds out you’re a human later down the line? What if you get Papyrus in trouble? You sighed mentally. A thought you’ve been thinking about nonstop yet trying not to think about at all came to the forefront of your mind. You’re going to have to leave before that happens. The thought of leaving your new skeleton buds, especially one you helped on an extremely personal level made you a little sad. You totally forgot you were in an actual conversation with Undyne when she snapped you back to reality. “Hey, you okay?”

  
“Oh, yeah, I’m fine! Thank you for apologizing.. I understand it’s your job to be on the lookout so no hard feelings.” She put her hands on her hips with a resounding clank, beaming. “No problem! I need to get back to be on time for training, but feel free to stop by Waterfall if you want to see the greats duking it out with the best of the best: **me**! And tell that slacker Sans to get back to work if you see him. I have no idea where he is, but I feel it in my gills that he’s off somewhere slacking.”, she huffed. “See ya!”

You waved her off, internally shaking from the incident. “Whew… that’s a problem for a future me. If I die, I die.”, you joked. You shut the door quietly, turning around to stare at the emptiness that was Papyrus’ and Sans’ house. “Now.. what’s the plan for today?”

* * *

  
You stood outside the house unsure of what to do. It was weird not having a skeleton in tow as you embarked to whatever destination you decided on next. Even when you first fell down here, Toriel lead you through the Ruins. You were truly alone this time, but, it didn’t have to be a bad thing. You could go exploring! You could RUN down the streets of Snowdin BUTT NAKED if you wanted to! Okay, maybe not that, but you were free to go wherever. You headed back down familiar territory towards Grillby’s. The library, no, librarby you passed all the time caught your attention. “Ah, I did say I’d check it out sometime.. I should go, hopefully they have monster history books and whatnot in there.”

Upon opening the door, you were greeted by a sweater clad lizard woman from behind the counter. “Welcome to the library, my name is Lizzy! I’m the librarian here should you need any help. And yes, we know. The sign is misspelled. We have someone working on it!” You giggled and said a small ‘hello’ to all the monsters in the room. All the books were color coded: red, blue, yellow, orange, light green, dark green. You decided to start from the second farthest bookshelf to your left. “Ah, this one is about monster knowledge!”

“ _While monsters are mostly made of magic, human beings are mostly made of water._ ” _70% to be exact_ , you interjected in your head. “ _Humans, with their physical forms, are far stronger than us but they will never know the joy of expressing themselves through magic._ ” Your head tilted in interest.

_'I’m stronger than most monsters?'_

You quickly perused through the rest of the pages for more information, but they only talked about bullet patterned birthday cards and weird terminology you didn’t quite understand. “Ugh.. and none of the other books on this shelf seem as important..” A rhinoesque monster with a beautiful, expensive handwoven scarf came up behind you. “What are you looking for, dear?”, she inquired. “Oh, just important stuff on monster history or magic and souls.. nothing by humans preferably. I already checked over there.”, you pointed. “I’m writing a book on just that topic, actually! Unfortunately, it’s not done yet. But I can show you others that I think would be very helpful to you!”  
  
The yellow horned lady quickly got you three books from each of the remaining shelves. “These should help! If you want something more in-depth, please ask our dear Liz.” You took them from her hands and thanked her as you both sat down at the kotatsu styled table in the middle of the room.

“ _Because they are made of magic, monster’s bodies are attuned to their SOUL._ ” The capitalization of ‘soul’ confused you, but you kept reading. “ _If a monster doesn't want to fight, its defenses will weaken. And the crueler the intentions of our enemies, the more attacks will hurt us. Therefore, if a being with a powerful SOUL struck with desire to kill.. Let's end the chapter here._ ” And that it did. All the rest of the pages were blank. On one of the last pages, you could see a faded red stain. You promptly closed the book. “OOOKAY, NEXT BOOK!”

The other two books touched on the capital, where the king and some others lived, and on the nature of these ‘SOULs’. But your mind kept floating back to the information from the orange hardcover notebook. “I’m stronger than most monsters.. _Humans_ are stronger than monsters… that’s crazy. Even with.. magic..” A random thought enveloped your mind.

**NO WONDER SANS WAS SCARED OF YOU.**

You winced at the sting of your own words. After quietly putting back the books where they belonged, you said goodbye to Liz and the gang.

“That’s enough information.. for now.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a lax chapter where reader learns a little more about the monsters she's surrounded by. also nice of undyne to apologize, too!! <3


	12. So I'm Sitting There, BBQ Sauce on My Crop Top

Deep grumbles and roars alerted you that there were other pressing matters to attend to: breakfast. “Wow, I really read books before I even tried to eat? Really shows how dedicated I am.” You skipped on over to Grillby’s once more for your first meal of the day. The bar was less than half full and it seemed no one cared if you came in or not. You breathed a sigh of relief as you took a seat right in front of Grillby.

As he had his back turned to you, fetching another bottle for one of the already drunk patrons, a mischievous thought shot through your mind. “Hey, hotstuff.”, you teased in a deep voice. Grillby immediately stopped what he was doing, looking a bit bewildered. The slight blush on his face let you know you got him. “How is it, being so hot all the time? I’ve totally got the HOTS for you! Grillby, you set my heart.. _ABLAZE_!”

Grillby snorted and raised his ‘eyebrow’ in playful confusion, wondering why you were suddenly openly flirting with him. “Why? Papyrus and Sans are out working and left me all alone, so I was trying to spice up your day while they were away.” Grillby gave you a concerned look. “How dare they, right? Leaving me alone to be so bored I’m here harassing you at your job.” Grillby snickered, a bit of smoke emanating from his mouth as he fetched you a menu. “My Sans impression is on point, ain’t it?”, you giggled.

He passed you a menu then left for a few to help another guest. Half the menu was calling to you. Mozzarella sticks, sliders, hot wings, you wanted it all. You pulled out the wad of cash Sans gave you, trying to figure out what you could get and what you couldn’t. Their currency was a bit confusing. “One slider, hot wings, sticks… no, if I get just all hot wings, then… y’know what, I’ll just take this burger and the sticks. It’s like 10 am.”

Grillby came back quickly with your order and you immediately began chowing down on the mozzarella sticks. As soon as he left, you donned a melancholier expression. You couldn’t stop thinking about the book. If you were upset at Sans and hit him, would that kill him? If your intent was to hurt Papyrus, could you hug him to death? When you said you didn’t want to hurt anyone down here, you meant it. Not your friends, not anyone. It was really bothering you, this book. Soon Grillby noticed, his flames fanning down to be able to come closer and nonverbally ask you if you were okay.

“I… no, I’m not okay.” You hushed your voice and leaned in closer. “You know I’m human, right?” Grillby nodded. “Well, I have to leave to..”, you whispered pointing upwards, “..the surface. I don’t know when exactly, but I have a feeling I might go tonight. I’ve really gotten comfortable here. But me staying down here, especially here in _Snowdin_ for too much longer..” Grillby flashed you an inquisitive look. “It’s.. Undyne. She stopped by and apologized to me, still thinking I’m a monster. If I stay..”

You sighed, putting down your burger. “ _Yeah_. So today, I’ll probably… take my last looks of Snowdin. On the brightside, I’m one step closer to seeing my family.”, you mumbled with a bitter smile. Grillby sensed that there was something there but asking you to expound upon that would be like opening a can of worms. Instead, he tenderly draped his arms over you, pulling you in for a quick hug.

Your face was red, half from the sudden display of affection, half from his flames lightly scorching your face. “Oh! You’re so sweet, Grillby.” He smiled brightly and chucked two thumbs up, encouraging you for the rest of your journey. “I’m a big girl!”, you sniffled. “No crying!” Stuffing the last of your burger into your mouth, you slid off the bar stool only to be stopped by your fiery friend. Grillby handed you a bunch of snacks to take, refusing payment for any of them. This time, you pulled him in for a back-crushing hug. You ran out of the restaurant touched by his generosity.

* * *

Right outside, you were stopped by that young monster kid again. “M.K.?” They wagged their tail. “Yup!! Me and my friends are getting together for a game today, wanna hang with?” You didn’t have anything else super important to do and some exercise might do you some good from being such a couch potato these last few days. “Sure! Need a referee?”, you said, jogging behind them as they lead you to the field. “Heck yes!! Loren’s sister is always referee but she doesn’t even know how to count passed 13!!”

Upon arriving, you saw an array of young monsters geared up to play a wholesome game of soccer. And each one of them.. had on striped shirts. “Hey, M.K.!!”, one piped up, “Who’s she?” M.K. stood triumphantly. “She’s my cool new friend with not one, not two, but a BILLION stripes on her shirt! It’s mad cool, yo!! She’s gonna be our referee!” You walked over to the tiny, child-sized chair they had available for you. “Am I supposed to sit here?”, you asked. M.K. nodded. “Once we pick teams, we’ll start!”

You waited on the sidelines for everyone to get on their respective teams. M.K. and a snowflake-like duck girl were picked as captains. Each team had seven rather unique players standing on both sides of the line quickly drawn into the snow. The worn-out soccer ball stood perfectly in the middle. “Well, I don’t really have a whistle, sooooo.. _GO_!”

The game was tame. You admittedly didn’t know everything about soccer, but you knew the basic rules to call out. Though, because they were kids, you mostly had to help them not cry when they fell or break up silly fights over trash talk. You zoned out for a bit, your mind once again falling on what you needed to do soon. Pack, as if you had a lot to pack anyways, make sure to say your goodbyes to Sans and Papyrus, try to avoid Undyne in Waterfall, NOT accidentally kill anyone on your way there.. Wait, where would you sleep if you couldn’t make it through tonight? You groaned loudly. You just wished you could sleep on Sans’ couch forever and not have to make all these decisions.

“Hey, ref—referee!! Look at this!!”, M.K. shouted. M.K. charged at the ball as fast as his little legs could go. “Stop him!”, one of the players shouted. “He never sticks that move!” M.K. wasn’t deterred and still attempted his signature move. “WATERFALLLLLL _SMAAAASH_!!” M.K. spun on his tail, spinning at just the right angle to kick the ball into the goal. All of his teammates were surprised and cheered until the ball hit a pole at an angle, making it fly right into.. “REF, WATCH OUT!” You woke from your thoughts just in time to get hit square in the nose by a speedy soccer ball.

“ARGH, FU— _UuuUUUDGE_!” You held your eyes shut as you held your nose. Wincing, you opened your teary eyes to find all the monsters huddled around you, worried. “Are you okay?? I’m so, so sorry!”, M.K. cried. “I just wanted to show you my move..” His little face seemed so heartbroken. You had no reason to be mad at him, it was only an accident.

“I-it’s okay. See?” You removed your hand from your nose to reveal that everything was fine, but everything was not fine. Dark red dripped down your face, covering your hand. “Darn.”, you grumbled. All the younger monsters backed away from you fearfully. “Wh-what is that?”, a bunny girl yelled. “I don’t know but this looks bad..”, another said, trembling. Had these kids never seen a nosebleed before? “It’s okay, it’s okay! It’s just a nosebleed.. though I may have to call it quits for today.”

“Blood..? But.. monsters **don’t** _bleed_.”

Oh. _Shit_.

“M.K., did you bring a human here…?”

“Is she gonna kill us??”

“My mommy said I can’t be friends with humans!”

A flurry of voices were all speaking at once, confusing you. Boy, were you panicking. These children would totally go home and tell their parents they met a human today. A dozen parents would know _exactly_ who you were. Then they would tell their friends, and their friends would tell their friends, and their friends would tell.. Undyne. M.K. jumped up and stood in front of you. “Back off, dudes!! She’s NOT a human. She told me so!! That red stuff’s gotta be.. uh.. BBQ sauce from Grillby’s.”

Everyone seemed to have quieted down as you sat frozen in fear. “Oh, yeah, it does look like it!”, one of the slimes yelled cheerfully. “I totally put Grillby’s BBQ sauce up my nose too, it’s radical.”, another slime admitted. You squinted. All the kids seemed pleased by M.K.’s answer and their excitable nature returned. For the second time today, a huge crisis was.. _totally avoided_???

“Well, you seem kinda tired so if you want to leave, you can.. but we all had fun with you today!!”, M.K. shouted. Everyone else returned the same sentiment, cheering and thanking you for being there. It made you smile. “Yeah, I’m gonna head home, but thanks for having me!” You waved back at them as you jogged off. After you got far enough, you fell into a slow walk.

_‘Two predicaments in one day. Every second I stay here… things just get more and more complicated.’_

* * *

You dug out the key to Sans and Papyrus’ house from your purse and unlocked the door. It was still as empty as you left it this morning. “Sans? Papyrus?”, you hollered. You waited a while in the silence. No answer. Plopping yourself on the couch, you shed yourself of your bloodstained top. You stared at it, then at your bloodstained hand. A tear or two fell from your eyes. It wasn’t out of general sadness or even bereavement over your favorite top. You were just _severely_ overwhelmed. You leaned back into the couch, trying to traverse through your emotions and get them back in check before leaving again.

A certain skeleton you didn’t know was home emerged from the kitchen sheepishly.

“i know this isn’t a good time but.. are you alright?”

You weren’t even shocked he was in the kitchen, even though you _know_ it was empty when you walked passed. As much as you’d like to cover yourself and yell at him for sneaking up on you, you just calmly replied. “Sans.. shouldn’t you be at work?”

“nah, i took one of my legally-required breaks.”

“Right when I needed someone?”

“mhm. call it.. intuition. now, what’s up?”


	13. So You're Sitting There, BBQ Sauce on Your Crop Top?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you haven't noticed, this chapter's title is super close to the last one! why? it's a mini chapter! not really mini in length but one where you get new insight since we were following the reader around last time. a retelling from another perspective!
> 
> how was papyrus' day fixing puzzles? why was sans in the kitchen? guess who's back again? and other fun things~

Papyrus held the door open, waiting for Sans to come outside. “coming, coming.”, he whispered. The shorter skeleton burst out laughing as the door closed. “IS SHE OKAY?”, Papyrus asked. “SHE DIDN’T MOVE AT ALL WHEN WE STUCK THE NOTES TO HER.” Sans adjusted his hands in his jacket’s pockets. “yeah, some humans are like that, super heavy sleepers.”, he said, quickly checking his watch. “i’m sure she’ll wake up in an hour or two. gonna go recalibrate your puzzles again today?” Papyrus twiddled his fingers. “Y-YEAH.. AND TODAY I HAVE TO GIVE UNDYNE A REPORT. UH, LATER.”

“about the human?”

“Y-YES, UNFORTUNATELY.. I DON’T WANT TO GET HER IN TROUBLE BUT I CAN’T.. LIE. UNDYNE IS COUNTING ON ME. IT’S SO CONFUSING!! I DON’T WANT TO LIE TO MY OLD FRIENDS, BUT I DON’T WANT TO HARM MY NEW ONE. NO ONE IS HAPPY EITHER WAY, NYEHHH.” A tinge of red hinted on Papyrus cheeks. He looked off to the ground, shrinking into himself. “AND, PLUS..”

A blush on his brother’s cheeks? Sans was curious. “and what?” Papyrus jumped. “NOTHING OF INTEREST!! C-CONTINUE.” Sans wanted to assume the obvious, but he let it go. “besides, whichever way you choose, things will go great in the end. even if she has to try over and over..”, he trailed off.

“WHAT?”

“oh, nothing. but don’t worry about it, pap.”, he said, placing one hand on Papyrus’ back, “everything will be okay. trust me.”

The conversation died down a bit, both of them calmly walking side by side as they journeyed into Snowdin Forest. They had half a kilometer left until they went their separate ways, and though the silence wasn’t awkward, Papyrus was itching to ask something. “god, i’m later than i thought.”, Sans interrupted. “i’m gonna have to cut this short and run to the station. see ya at home, pap.”

Papyrus, albeit a little disappointed, waved Sans off as he went off to work. A small figure loomed in the background, watching, lurking.

Today was the perfect day.

* * *

Papyrus stood before one of the first puzzles a human would encounter if they traversed through Snowdin Forest. “AH, BROKEN AGAIN.. THANK ASGORE THE GREAT PAPYRUS IS SO DEDICATED TO HIS CRAFT!” Papyrus began taking out his tools from his battle body, attempting to fix whatever was wrong with it. He put down one screwdriver and tried to pick up another one, instead touching something vaguely fleshy. Bug-eyed, he gasped. “OH, FLOWERY!” Flowey grimaced. “It’s Flowey.”, he mumbled. “HOWDY, Papyrus! How are you, ya big hunk?”

“BETTER THAN EVER! THOUGH, NOW THAT I REMEMBER, THERE’S SOMEONE GOING AROUND THAT LOOKS JUST LIKE YOU, ATTACKING PEOPLE! THEY ATTACKED THE HUMAN A FEW DAYS AGO, BUT FORTUNATELY ME AND SANS WERE THERE TO FEND THEM OFF!!”

Flowey chuckled mockingly. “Gosh, really? That sounds terrifying! That human is so lucky to have someone as strong as you around! How is she, anyway?” Papyrus beamed as he finally took up the right tool for undoing this faulty screw. “SHE’S GREAT! SHE’S BEEN STAYING WITH US FOR THE LAST FEW DAYS. I’M HAPPY TO HAVE SUCH A COOL FRIEND AROUND!! SHE EVEN HELPED SANS OUT WITH WHATEVER PROBLEMS HE WAS HAVING.”

‘ _I severely doubt that’_ , he scoffed. “She sounds swell!! Is she with your brother? I’d love to pop by and give her a hearty hello!” Papyrus strained, thinking. “SHE’S AT HOME ASLEEP. THOUGH, IT’S BEEN A WHILE, SHE’S PROBABLY AT ‘GREASEBY’S’ GETTING BREAKFAST. MAKE SURE TO TELL HER YOU’RE THE NICE FLOWEY AND SHE PROBABLY WON’T HIT YOU!!”

“Will do, buddy!”, Flowey winked. “Will do.”

* * *

Flowey looked everywhere for you. Unable to break through ground that was inorganic, he was limited in places he could search. “Still asleep, huh? Guess I gotta wait on this girl.” To his surprise, you emerged from Grillby’s, walking right towards him. Before he dove into the ground for cover, that monster kid stopped you in your tracks.

“M.K.?”, you asked. The kid wagged their tail. “Yup!! Me and my friends are getting together for a game today, wanna hang with?” You pondered a bit before replying that you’d love to go and if they’d have you as their referee. Flowey watched as you jogged behind the monster to a field relatively unknown to him. “This is gonna be longer than I thought.”

“Well, uh, I don’t really have a whistle, sooooo.. GO!”, you yelled, waving your arms frantically. Flowey nestled himself somewhere far away where neither you nor the players could see him, but he could see you perfectly. “This game is awful. When I had a body, I played better than this. Even as a flower, I’d play better than this.”, he spat. “I can’t believe I’m really having to sit through this garbage.”

As much as he complained that he hated watching them, watching you, he was feeling a pang of.. envy? For this stupid, stupid human girl? Impossible, he thought. His anger towards you manifested itself into rage. He was one smile away from fighting you right here, right now, in front of all of these unsuspecting monster children.. but that would ruin his plan. “I thought there was one smiley trashbag, but there’s two.”, he joked, bitterly.

But soon, that smile would be wiped clean off your face. Literally. “REF, WATCH OUT!” The worn-out soccer ball ricocheted off the goal post, heading right for you. The ball landed with a loud thwack. Flowey howled. “What an idiot.”

“I-it’s okay. See?” A waterfall of blood ran down your face, ruining your top and staining your right hand. “Change of plans.”

* * *

It was a day like any other. Snowy, devoid of people (besides Papyrus and Undyne sometimes), and downright boring. He wanted to take a nap, but he had already taken two since the start of the work day. Sans rolled his skull between his hands knowing this would be it for the day. No mischief, no more humans that’s for sure. Well, it could happen.. maybe. Two humans in such a short time frame? There was a less than .01% chance of that happening. But, it had happened before.. you..

“Howdy, buddy!”

Sans closed his eyes, clenching his teeth, visibly annoyed. “Budddddy. Paaaaal. Don’t be that way! This route isn’t going the way either of us planned. We might as well be friends.”, Flowey jeered. Sans opened his eyes to reveal his left flashing electric blue. “you have 10 seconds to get away from me before you become fertilizer.”

“Aha! You’re just as funny as I remembered you forty-one and a half timelines ago. But you should really listen to me before your girlfriend dies.”

Sans tensed.

_‘girlfriend?’_

“Of course, I don’t care if she dies or not, but maybe you do! You’re the one all depressed about the resets and all. Maybe you should do something right for once and not let her bleed to death? She hasn’t been SAVEing either. Good for her. Maybe she’ll die and somehow restart back on the surface, leaving you all to be stuck down here for another 700 years!”

A bone shot out at Flowey, just narrowly missing his stem. “Oo, did I hit a nerve? It’s your choice, really. She should be halfway through Snowdin by now, probably painting the town red with her nosebleed. But have fun! Once you see that I’m right you’ll be begging for my help, just like Toriel begged you for yours. But you’re not doing a very good job protecting her, are you?”

Flowey cackled before plunging into the snow, never to be seen for the rest of the day. Sans sat in silence, trying to stop himself from giving this interaction much thought. It’s just Flowey, right? Stupid, asshole Flowey who does nothing but try to rile him up for unknown reasons. In some timelines, he’d avoid Sans. In others, he was bold. This was one of those timelines.

But why today? Was it because you were alone? Oh God, was it because he left you alone? He quickly got up from his seat only to stop himself to think. You were okay. You HAD to be okay. You were capable! Strong! Quick witted! If anything went wrong, you knew where to find him. You were fine. You were totally.. fine…

But one little peek wouldn’t hurt.

Sans cut through the densely packed trees behind him to give him cover to teleport. A chuckle came from a distance. “Typical.”

* * *

The jester near Grillby’s looked at you with faint concern as you walked by, but you didn’t notice. You also didn’t notice that someone was tailing you subtly. “he was right, dammit.” From the glimpses he could see from behind you, you looked awful. Shirt ruined, hand stained, face steadily dripping. And the worst part is he didn’t even know what from. “she’s too close to the house, i can’t out run her to get there first, ff—”

Sans pulled his hoodie over his head and ducked into another set of densely packed trees for cover. In a split second, he was teleported into the kitchen.. in the air. “ah, sh—”, he whistled before landing face first on the tiles. It was hard for him to control where he’d end up when he was hurrying. He got up and shook it off, right before the front door was unlocked by none other than you. “Sans? Papyrus?”, you shouted. “I guess they’re still at work..”

The couch squeaked and grumbled; your feet cuddled under you. It didn’t seem you were in immediate danger.. until he heard barely audible sniffles coming from the living room. He debated with himself on if he should leave you or not, but there’s no way he could. He was surprised to see that not only were you a bloody mess and a crying mess, but a bloody crying mess with your shirt off.

“i know this isn’t a good time but.. are you alright?”, Sans whispered.

“Sans.. shouldn’t you be at work?”, you replied.

“nah, i took one of my legally-required breaks.”

“Right when I needed you?”

“mhm. call it.. intuition.”, he chuckled. or manipulative little floweruition. “now, what’s up?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> flowey is always so fun to write. just sprinkle a little sass and irritation and bam! ya got flowey.


	14. Give A Girl A Bone

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> just in case, no, this is not this kind of chapter 😤!!

“As you can see.. I’m bleeding. My shirt also got ruined.. again. And I’m overwhelmed. _Super_ overwhelmed. But I’m okay. You can go back to work if you’d like.” A damp, skeleton patterned handkerchief was passed over to you by Sans. “here.” You stared at it for a while, choosing to ignore his accidental antics at a time like this. “…Thank you.”

Sans twiddled his fingers, seeming rather uneasy. Besides you being, well, shirtless, was it the blood that scared him? You hurriedly cleaned yourself off, patting your face, chest, and hand dry with the less damp end of the rag. “I’m clean, you can look at me now.”, you joked. “i, uh.. i didn’t want to be disrespectful. didn’t wanna make you feel uncomfortable, y’know. oh, wait, you missed a spot.”, he said, pointing to your left cheek. “Here?”, you asked. “no, higher.” You went up higher and scrubbed. “Gone?” Sans shook his head. “no, higher, like near your eye.” You scrubbed in a wide circular motion, attempting to get your whole cheek. “HERE?”

He let out an exasperated sigh. “no, no, just give it here.” Sans sat closer and took the rag from you, folding it in half onto the cleaner side. He then took you by the chin and wiped away the spot you missed, even going over the places you already cleaned. “What am I, a baby?”, you jeered. Sans cleaned off the last spot and returned the rag to you. “you’re crying like one, so i have to treat you just as delicately.” He meant it to be a joke, yet his last words made your face heat up a bit. “and nah, i wouldn’t leave you like this. wasn’t it you who said it’s okay to lean on others?”, he winked. Did he really just used your own words against you. Damn him.

All it did was make you more flustered. “Ugh”, you groaned, “I’m _fine_. I just.. I’m just..” Sans leaned in closer, ready to listen. “I’m tired of lying, Sans. Undyne came and apologized, the monster kids were close to finding out I was human.. if I stay here in Snowdin any longer..” Sans laid his hand on his lap. “…so you’re leaving.” You gave a quick nod.

“you must really want to go home, huh. hey. i know the feeling, buddo.”, he remarked, taking your bloodied shirt from you. “c’mon. i’ll wash this then help ya get yourself together.”

Sans scrubbed out all the stains with cold water, then left the house for only 5 minutes and came back with it perfectly dry. “Do monster dryers work that fast?” Sans winked. “lava works wonders.” With your shirt back where it belonged, you both worked to sort out what you’d be taking with you on your journey. “waterfall is wet and hotland is hot. the core can be coolish or really hot depending. you won’t need the sweatpants. wait, how’d you get all these snacks?” You smiled smugly. “I’m so cute Grillby felt inclined to shower me in gifts. Food gifts!” Sans continued packing your stuff into your purse, playfully ignoring you. “Heeeey, don’t ignore m—”

*BZZZZZT!*

“what was that?”, he asked. A light shined then dimmed in your purse. _Your phone_. You and Sans stared at each other. Sans gestured with his head to check it out. Oh God, you finally had signal down here?! Did a friend text? Was it a notification from Tunglr? Please, let it be anything! Your hand shook trying to dig through your neatly packed snacks to get your phone at the bottom. You said a small prayer and pressed the home button, hoping for the best. Sans saw your shoulders drop. “what it’d say?” A sigh escaped your lips. “ _Low Battery. 20% battery remaining_. Thank you, phone, for reminding me I don’t even have a charger. Not that this phone is useful anyways.” You placed the phone right back under your chips and cookies as Sans pondered. “alphys can make you a charger i’m sure.” You blinked. “Who’s that?”

“one of undyne’s friends in hotland. she loves human culture though, so don’t worry. i’m sure she’ll know and love that you’re.. you.” You closed the snap to your crossbody and slung it across your shoulder. “I’ll bet.”, you murmured sarcastically.

You stepped out of the front door and stood. Sans watched your back as you had second thoughts about this whole thing. “don’t think. just do. me and pap will always be here. we’re all rooting for you.” You spun around and grabbed Sans into a hug. “I CAN’T BELIEVE I’M NEEEEVER GONNA SEE YOU AGAIN! EVERRRR!”. Sans awkwardly put his hands around your back, returning the hug. “you’ll just be a few miles away.”, he said through laughing. “you’ll see us around, kid.”

Sans broke the hug and started for the stairs. “wait, i just remembered something. stay here.” He shuffled into his room then back downstairs to hand you an old cellphone. A cellphone with.. terribly outdated memes on the case. “since your phone is dying and wouldn’t be able to reach us anyway, i’ll give you my old phone. it already has papyrus’ number in it, and i just added my new one. now you can call us anytime.”

You checked the phone’s battery. 100%! “I’ll get you all out. I promise.”, you whispered, smiling. The densely packed snow cushioned the sound of you skipping towards Waterfall. Sans continued watching as you sped away. You stopped after you remembered you were missing someone important. “Wait. What about Papyrus? I can’t leave without saying goodbye to him.”

Sans pointed in the opposite direction. “he’s still in snowdin forest. i’d tell you to go find him but the forest isn’t the safest place to be in. and with him fixing his puzzles, you might get trapped.. or _worse_. i’ll just have to tell ‘im you’re in waterfall.” You frowned. Hard. You wanted to tell that goofball yourself that you’d miss him.. But at least he wouldn’t be unknowing of your whereabouts. You rushed back and gave Sans an even tighter hug. “This one’s for Papyrus. Transfer this hug to him for me, okay?”

You ran away before he could even reply, disappearing into the thickening fog. Sans closed the door and leaned against it. Empty. A quick glimpse at the couch made him realize you left two of your snacks lain against it. He walked over to pick them up and noticed there was a note left.

“FOR YOU & PAP! DON’T BE GREEDY. I LEFT TWO SO SHARE.”

Next to it was a little drawing of you with extremely angry eyebrows and a heart. “heh. cute.” Taking up the ketchup flavored chips you left for him, he got himself in the right mind frame to teleport back. “she really could save all of us, and i can go back..” Trying to clear his mind made his thoughts fall upon your last interactions. The slightest of smile crept on his face, making him scratch his cheek in response. “..what a dangerous game i’m playing. just a couple more days and we’ll see.”

* * *

Flailing your arms like a wacky waving inflatable arm flailing tube man wasn’t helping at all. “Why is there so much fog? What am I, in.. in.. NEWFOGLAND?” You chocked up your terrible joke to spending way too much time in the skeleton household. Slowly, you continued down the path, hoping not to trip on any mounds of snow. You kept your arms in front of you, watching out for anything or anybody. Your arms were way too wide apart, though, allowing you to knock into something spherical. “ACK! What the heck..?” You patted down the figure, noticing it wasn’t spherical all the way down. Below it was a knobby pole that felt sort of familiar to you. It shuddered. “H-HELLO??” You quickly let go, embarrassed. “P-PAPYRUS!! It’s me, s-sorry, I can’t see in this fog!” Papyrus happily turned around to greet you. “HUMAN!! I’M SO GLAD TO SEE YOU!! BUT… WHY ARE YOU OUT HERE?? YOU PASSED THE HOUSE ALREADY! AND PAST ME IS WATERFALL.”

You grimaced. Even though you _wanted_ to tell Papyrus goodbye, you were.. nervous. Even worse, the fog lifted a little so you could see Papyrus’ ever so happy and eager smile. You scratched the back of your head, thinking. “Uh.. well.. I’m..” ‘ _Spit it out already_.’ “Papyrus, I’m leaving. Sans gave me your number, though! So I can call you whenever!” He tilted his head. “LEAVING.. TO WATERFALL?”

“Well, yes. But leaving to.. home. My home. The surface. I won’t be home with you tonight.” Papyrus’ face fell. “BUT.. BUT… WHO WILL TEACH ME HOW TO COOK ALL THE COOL PASTAS??”, he cried. “Undyne, probably.” A pout sprouted on Papyrus’ face. “WHAT ABOUT OUR BATTLE SCENARIOS WITH MY ACTION FIGURES??” Oh, darn. You never got to see them. “Listen, when I make it out of here, I’ll get you a _BILLION_ action figures!” Laying your head on his armor, you gave him a big hug. “Please don’t be sad. _Oryou’llmakemefeelinsanelyguilty_. I love ya, okay?” You let go of his body, letting your hands trail down his arms and into his hands. You squeezed both, reassuring him that you would see him soon. “See you, Pap. Call me!”

Papyrus quietly let you go, seeing you as you left. Your words stuck with him.

_I love you, okay?_

He ran past you and held out his arms, blocking the way. “N-NO YOU CAN’T GO!!” Three larger than life-sized bones popped out of the ground, making you almost fall off balance. You were impressed, intrigued even, but undeterred. “That.. was cool. But I have to go, Papyrus.”, you pleaded. Three more bones danced around you, nonthreateningly swaying about. You sidestepped them, allowing them to easily move passed you. With your eyes squinted, you stood waiting for an explanation.

Papyrus trembled trying to remember what to say. He couldn’t entirely understand why he was doing this, but he still continued on. “S-SO YOU WON’T FIGHT..” Your eyebrow furrowed. “Fight what? The bones?”

“THEN.. L-LET’S SEE IF YOU CAN HANDLE MY FABLED ‘BLUE ATTACK!’” You began to ask Papyrus what in the fresh hell he was talking about before a flurry of blue bones and fierce wind stopped your question. Standing your ground against the rush of wind was tough. You braced yourself for one of the bones coming right at you, but they phased right through your body. The fog cleared from Papyrus’ show of power, allowing you to see the confusion on his face.

“Dude. What’s going on with y—” An uncharacteristic heaviness fell upon you. Your chest felt like an anchor, keeping your body relatively low to the ground. “What..?” Something rustling behind you got your attention: another bone. You tried dodging it, but your reflexes were notably slower. It hit you head on throwing you a couple feet.

With a look of guilt, Papyrus gazed at you on the ground. “TH-THAT’S MY ATTACK..

Y-YOU’RE BLUE NOW.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *bonetrousle plays*


	15. Bonetrousle.. of Justice??

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HAPPY AFTER AFTER VALENTINES!! i wanted to update on vday then i was swamped with HW, aww..  
> i took the time to write up some more outlines instead! <3

Thankfully, the snow softened your landing. You crawled before Papyrus, unsure of what just happened. Did he just hurt you? Papyrus, the sweet skeleton who worried himself sick over you passing out in the snow? The Papyrus who thought glitter was _edible_? You sat up, allowing yourself to see what you were up against. Yup, that same Papyrus.

“What are you doing?”, you shouted. “No, what did you do to me?” Papyrus sweated and avoided your gaze, throwing out his hand to produce another attack. You instinctively jumped backwards away from him.. floating? “Wh-what in the—?!” Falling back to the ground with relative ease, you stood there marveling at yourself. When you moved back and forth, it was like there was a delay in your movements. You jumped up, jumping way higher than you had ever jumped before.

Another trio of bones flew at you, cutting your learning moment short. You flipped over them easily, partly because of your newfound ‘powers’. “NYEHHH!”, Papyrus bleated nervously. He changed up his tactics and threw out seven bones of different heights and speeds. You had to keep skidding backwards to get enough momentum to jump over the taller ones. “Papyrus! Answer me!”, you yelled. He continued to very obviously ignore your words. “ **Don’t make me call Sans on you**!” His eyes opened wide. “N-NO!!”

If only you hadn’t said that. Papyrus no longer gave you the choice of resting between attacks. Tall bones, short bones in succession, bones from the sky, it was impossible to keep up. You kept getting hit by the blue bones until you learned to stay still and let them pass. Between the expended energy and hits you were getting, you were out of breath. His attacks were just as unpredictable as he was.

Fortunately, it seemed Papyrus was getting out of breath as well. Though, you were pretty sure he didn’t breathe at all. Either way, you were tired of the shenanigans. It was time to end this. “I’ve been on the offensive this whole time..”, you thought to yourself. You were either going to have to punch the hell out of Papyrus or try to escape. The latter seemed more plausible. As you slowly walked backwards, your back was met with huge, rigid bones confining you to this area. Damn. “Y-YOU CAN’T LEAVE!!”, Papyrus shouted, “I’M.. I’M GONNA USE MY SPECIAL ATTACK!” Great. Another attack. How much power did Papyrus have?

“YEAH!!! VERY SOON I WILL USE MY SPECIAL ATTACK! SO, UM, GIVE UP IF YOU DON’T WANT TO SEE THAT!!” You jumped over his barrage of bones and looked him dead in the eye. You were on your last leg but upkept your bluff. No amount of training in the gym prepared you for any of this. “THIS IS YOUR LAST CHANCE… BEFORE MY SPECIAL ATTACK!!” The amount of sweat rolling off him could fill a bucket or three. “I..! I…! I CAN’T DO IT!! I DON’T WANT TO HURT YOU!!” The bones keeping you trapped disappeared, and that uncomfortable heavy feeling in your chest dissipated. You kept yourself at a distance just in case this was a fake act. “Then why the hell did you start fighting me?”

“BECAUSE.. OF.. FEELINGS!! FEELINGS LIKE.. THE JOY OF FINDING ANOTHER PASTA LOVER. THE ADMIRATION FOR ANOTHER'S PUZZLE-SOLVING SKILLS. THE DESIRE TO HAVE A COOL, SMART PERSON THINK YOU ARE COOL. THESE FEELINGS… THEY MUST BE WHAT YOU ARE FEELING RIGHT NOW.” You raised your eyebrows. “N-NO.. THEY’RE WHAT I’M FEELING.. I THINK?? I DON’T KNOW! I CAN HARDLY IMAGINE WHAT IT MUST BE LIKE TO FEEL THAT WAY, BUT, ALSO.. I _DO_!!”

All of this was confusing you. Pasta? Puzzles? Was this a roundabout way of saying he’ll miss you? “Papyrus, I’m not sure if I understand you. But I do understand that you’re going to miss me at the house. There’s only one person that can make spaghetti that good and that’s me.”, you joked. “But I have to go. My family.. they probably think I’m dead. I want them to know I’m okay. I want to help everyone here, too.”

“Didn’t you say you wanted to ride a hot rod with the wind in your hair and the sun on your skin?” Papyrus nodded. “I can’t do that in Snowdin. Just _call_ me, okay? Would a picture help you feel better while I’m away?” He stared at his boots before replying “YES.” Papyrus took out his flip phone and pointed it towards you two. Being on your tippy toes didn’t help you get any closer to the phone. “Ah, you’re gonna have to bend down a bit.” Pressing your cheek up against his, you did a peace sign and yelled, “Say cheese!” Papyrus turned his face towards you in confusion. “CHEESE? BUT THIS IS A PHONE.”

You closed your eyes trying to stifle a laugh. “Papyrus.. just smile.” After taking a few pictures with both his and your phone, you both sat around for a bit. “Well..”, you started, “this is it. Don’t try that magic stuff again or I’ll chop you.” Papyrus bent down and hugged you, tight. It seemed like such a sad hug for someone who’s only known you a few days. “H-HUMAN I.. BE CAREFUL OUT THERE. I NEED MY GOOD FRIEND TO COME BACK IN ONE PIECE, THE HUMAN PIECE.”, he replied with his usual smiling face. You couldn’t help but laugh. “Wouldn’t have it any other way. See ya later, Papyrus.”, you giggled, “Tell me how the next episode of How I Met Your Mettaton is tonight.”

Papyrus waved as you continued to Waterfall. “THE SEASON FINALE IS SURE TO BE A HOOT!! I’LL RECORD IT FOR YOU!!” As soon as he saw you were gone, he started sweating buckets and tapping his fingers together.

“I HAVE ONLY BAD FEELINGS ABOUT THIS.”

A reddening of his face interrupted his thoughts of how all this was only about your safety and nothing else.

Perhaps he was dealing with some very.. _complex_ feelings, too.

* * *

“Wow. Totally wasn’t expecting Waterfall to be so.. watery.”, you joked to yourself as you walked through this unfamiliar town. It was more cave-like than Snowdin was, and a lot less lively. The indigo walls and floors were beautiful, having crystals embedded into the walkway every other step. The noise of moving waters was relaxing yet unnerving. You gripped your purse and power walked through the hallway to find a familiar face.

And.. Sans???

You stared at him in genuine surprise. Sans noticed your puzzlement and winked at you, upsetting you even more. How did he get here? How did he get passed you? Was there a path you didn’t know about? “Weren’t you at wor— how did even you g— did you SEE all that— I—”, you sputtered. Sans’ smile turned wide as you expressed your confusion over his whereabouts.

“what? haven’t you seen a guy with two jobs before? fortunately, two jobs mean twice as many legally required breaks. i’m going to grillby’s. wanna come?” Your expressionless face made Sans smile even cheekier. “well?”

“I’ve already been to Grillby’s this morning.” Sans waved his hand at you. “so?” The sound of rushing water made it a little hard to hear him to reply. “Soooo, it means I’m not going! I swear you and your brother are such distractions. Fun distractions but distractions nonetheless!”, you yelled, pointing. Sans chuckled while pointing beside him. “well, since you’re here, you should at least touch this thing. it’s for good luck.”, he said with a wink.

“This thing again?”, you squatted. You hadn’t touched one of those twinkling diamonds since you last saw Toriel. **Blip**! “I can’t actually touch it because my hand goes through it. Is that supposed to happen?” Sans shrugged, covertly letting out a sigh of relief. “maybe.” **Blip**! **Blip**! **Blip**! **Blip**! **Blip**! You waved your hand through the diamond a few more times just to irritate Sans with the noise. “okay, okay. get outta here, kid.”

“Alright, Shortstack. Don’t be _bonely_ without me.” Sans lowered his eyelids and smirked. “i _cannoli_ do so much.” You ran away yelling, “Okay, bye, no more puuuuuns!” Sans looked at the SAVE point then back at you, but you were already out of sight.

“good luck, kid. you’re gonna need it.”

* * *

A six-foot bundle of armor stood waited impatiently, its agitated foot taps echoing off the cave’s walls. “Where the HECK is Papyrus?? That fool is ALWAYS on time with his daily report, argh!” Undyne rumbled through her armor and found her phone, attempting to call Papyrus.

_Ring, ring.._

“HELLO?”, he answered. “PAPYRUS!! Get your bony butt down here! It’s the start of a new week for human hunting, or did you forget?” Papyrus’ bones were rattling so loud Undyne could hear them through the phone. “O-OH UNDYNE [STATIC NOISE] I AM BREAKING UP [STATIC NOISE] CANNOT [STATIC NOISE] HEAR YOU! WILLCALLBACKLATERBYE—” The phone call abruptly ended with Undyne looking dumbfounded at her phone. Did Papyrus really keep saying ‘static noise’? “NGAAAHH!! I GUESS I HAVE TO BRING HIM HERE MYSELF!”

She stomped through Waterfall, annoyed that she had to move from her post to go get Papyrus for the report. A small figure ran into her leg, bouncing back from the blow. “Undyne, Undyne!!” Undyne bent down to their size. “What’s up, kid?” The little monster was absolutely belligerent. “Today I played soccer and— there was a LOOOOT of blo— but she’s _super_ nice so??” Undyne took off her helmet and grinned. “One thing at a time, champ.”

The monster pouted. “You know the girl with the rainbow shirt?” Of course, Undyne knew you, she apologized to you a couple hours ago! “Yeah, Sphynxy!” The monster beamed. “I didn’t know we had a human in the Underground!”

“I know she may look human, but we shouldn’t discriminate. She’s one of those hairless cat monsters.” The monster tilted their head. “But I just saw her fighting Papyrus! And her soul was.. _**PINK**_..”

“..Pink?”

Total silence. Undyne’s eye twitched, simultaneously shattering her phone that was still in her hand. The young monster backed up, a bit frightened. She squatted back down to eye level with the child, a slightly deranged smile on her face.

“…Where is she?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well that didn't even last a full day, oops
> 
> (jeez i feel so bad for what's about to happen a few more chapters in,,,,  
> but you didn't hear that from me!!)


	16. Wacky Times in Waterfall

Pausing at a thicket of tall grass, you braced yourself to run through it. “Ready.. set.. _go_!” You ran through, shielding your face from lashes and cuts. Unfortunately, you tripped over something on your way out. “Ow!”

Looking back, you saw a familiar face you passed at the beginning of Waterfall: Monster Kid! “ _What_ are you doing in the grass?”, you groaned, rubbing your hip. Monster Kid shook himself off and jumped up like nothing happened. “I was waiting on Undyne!! She’s usually here but she’s not on her post today.. weird. She must be deeper into Waterfall doing training. C’mon! Let’s go watch her beat up some bad guys!!”

Your little friend zoomed off into Waterfall, leaving you on your butt. You got up and kept walking, not even attempting to get him to slow down. A feeling of dread hung over you, making your legs feel like heavyweights. But you pepped yourself up and stayed determined.

You could do this!

_..Couldn’t you?_

On the other hand, Undyne was in between a rock and a hard place. You... were a human. You had to be. Cats bleed, cat _monsters_ do not. And your SOUL.. _pink_! Why didn’t she just check before apologizing to you? She should have just 1v1’d you right there in Grillby’s! But she really wanted to believe that you weren’t lying. That Papyrus, her most loyal soldier, would tell her.. That that lazy bones Sans would be useful for once.

“NGAHHH! I CAN’T BELIEVE THIS!”, she yelled, throwing her broken phone onto the ground. “You said she’s in Waterfall?!” The kid nodded. “Ohh, she’s gonna get a Waterfall alright. When she FALLS into the WATER and I take her SOUL FOR **ASGORE** , FUFUFU!!” Undyne’s maniacal laughter made the tiny monster back off and run back towards home. Realizing her mistake, she tried stopping them, but it was too late. Making a fist, she summoned one of her trusty blue spears, scoffing. “Oh, _it’s time_.”

 _No_ one wanted to be the person in Undyne’s way today. Big and small monsters alike moved out of her path without question. She was on a mission and they blindly trusted Undyne to fix whatever or whoever it was. Sans peeped Undyne coming his direction and made sure his station was in tiptop shape. Though, he knew that angry walk. ‘ _did she know...?’_

He prayed not. It could be anything, right? It didn’t _have_ to be _that_. And honestly, when was she ever calm? And when was the Underground _not_ out of whack? ‘w _ell, that actually might be why she’s so angry all the time’_ , he thought to himself. He made eye contact with her and pulled a big, cheesy grin. “top of the afternoon to ya, boss.”

A heavy hand came down onto his desk, getting a few bystanders’ attention. “Save it, lover boy.”, she snarled. “Or did you two not _know_? Tch, whatever. Just know this little party you’ve been having? Ends **_today_**.” She ended her sentence by moving her thumb across her throat to get her point across. Even though she was vague, Sans knew _exactly_ what she was talking about, _who_ she was talking about.

**You**.

Sans watched her stomp away, armor clanking against each other with every step. As much as he wanted to curse, he needed to take some sort of action and fast. Quickly taking out his phone, he dialed the fourth saved number in his contacts. He waited through six rings until a female voice picked up and answered. “Ah, h-hello?”

“hey, buddy. friend. amigo.”

“Sans, what do y-you want, my ramen’s gonna get cold!”

The lights in his eye sockets disappeared, startling a random monster who just happened to be looking in his direction.

“ **where is she**.”

* * *

Waterfall was a treasure. You took the time to savor every little bit of the journey. The squeaky mushrooms, the small, rushing rivers you jumped over, just the ambiance of it all. It even sounded like there was an orchestra playing a rather somber song that you couldn’t tell if you liked or not. You hummed and whistled along to the melody anyway, allowing it to keep your paranoia at bay.

Tall, cyan flowers greeted you on the way to the next room. They were bio-luminescent, standing upright, with not a care in the world. Yet, something seemed so sad about them. You made your way over to one flower, rubbing your thumb over the delicate little petals. Without notice, it started to speak. “ _A long time ago, monsters would whisper their wishes to the stars in the sky. If you hoped with all your heart, your wish would come true. Now, all we have are these sparkling stones on the ceiling..._ ”

You jumped back, looking around for the voice’s source. “Did that flower just..? I.. I keep forgetting flowers talk down here.” You backed away from the flower, profusely apologizing. “S-sorry for touching you!” Turning around, you bump into another talking flower. “ _I wish my sister and I will see the real stars someday..._ ” The sad longing woven into the voice of the flower pulled at your heart strings. It made you look up at the ceiling with it, feeling the sadness it must feel to be planted here, forever staring at a fake sky.

“I’m so sorry.. You’ll be able to see real stars _real_ soon. I’ll make sure of it.” You tapped the flower on the stem, attempting to console it. “ _I’m so sorry.. You’ll be able to see real stars real soon. I’ll make sure of it._ ” You perked up. “Wh.. why’d you copy me?” Removing your hand from its stem made it talk again. “ _Wh.. why’d you copy me?_ ”

..Oh. _OH_. You smacked yourself in the forehead. “They just repeat what they hear..” A giggle turned into an entire laugh fit, unable to control yourself. “I’m a dummy. Onto the next room!” You skipped your way into the northmost room happily.

Unbeknownst to you, you overlooked a talking flower you knew _all_ too well...

* * *

Your first impression of the area was a weird one. No flowers, much water, and.. plaques. Walking past, you saw that the plaques were glowing. A particular one caught your eye, making you stop to read it with curiosity.

“ _But humans have one weakness. Ironically, it is the strength of their SOUL. Its power allows it to persist outside the human body, even after death. There is only one exception. The SOUL of a special species of monster called a “Boss Monster.” A Boss Monster’s SOUL is strong enough to persist after death... if only for a few moments. A human could absorb this SOUL. But this has never happened.”_

 _‘A boss monster, huh?’_ This was interesting yet disturbing information. “Souls are really powerful here..” These ‘souls’ still confused the living daylights out of you, but you tried your hardest to understand in your own way. While pondering on this new information, you realized you missed a sentence at the bottom.

“ _And now it never will.”_

The ominous tone distressed you, yet it pushed you to read the next plaque.

“ _If a monster defeats a human, they can take its SOUL. A monster with a **human** **SOUL**... A horrible beast with **unfathomable** **power**._”

You took a quick peek at the last plaque beside that one, disturbed by at what was on it. It was an illustration of a strange, strange.. creature. There was something very unsettling about this drawing. In retreat, you dropped your purse, making everything but your phone spill out of it. “Ffff—”, you hissed, scrambling to grab your possessions. Your favorite tube of lip-gloss rolled onto the other side, the wood creaking with every footstep of yours chasing after it. Thankfully, it was stopped from falling into the water by...

Monster Kid?

You picked up the tube and crammed it back in your purse. “MK! I know those spikes anywhere. Why are you sitting here all alone? I thought you wanted to see Undyne!”

No response. You shifted to look at him a little better and noticed he was.. pale. Gray. Pale _gray_. His whole.. body...

“Have you ever thought about a world where everything is exactly the same.. Except you don’t exist? Everything functions perfectly without you.. Ha, ha... _The thought terrifies me_.” His voice was so.. monotone. You reached out your hand and laid it on his shoulder. “M.. K..?”

He slowly turned around where you could meet his eyes. They were missing.

“ **Please don’t think about this anymore.** ” One blink and he was gone. You rubbed your eyes hoping that he’d reappear, or something would suggest that wasn’t a hallucination. But no.. you were alone. Suddenly, the silence of the marsh seemed deafening. You were terrified. It took a lot not to run through that door and right back into the comfort of Snowdin and the familiarity of Sans and Papyrus' house.

But you had to do this.

You had to keep going.

At the end of the dock was a raft no bigger than the width of your shoulders. It seemed like the only way to move on.. Unless you wanted to fall into the abyss that is the waters of Waterfall. The black waters rippled gently as you stared into it. There was no reflection. With the previous interaction hurled to the back of your mind, you put one foot forward onto the raft.

What were you waiting for?

With one last look behind you, you placed both feet on the raft. It was scary.. but it had to be done. This was a choice you had to make.

_Even if you had no **real** choice in the matter, really._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> things are getting a little spooky!! what's going on in waterfall? 
> 
> what's going on period??


	17. Love on The Skull

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a day late from my usual scheduling but better late than never!!

“Sh-sh-she who??” The silence gave her the answer. “O-oh, of course!” A skidding chair then fast clacking could be heard through the receiver. “She’s, uhhh.. on the dock!” Sans heaved a sigh of relief. “good, she’s not there yet. what about undyne?”

“Wh-why would you think I’d k-know where Undyne is at a-all times??” Sans snickered, closing his eyes in slight irritation. “just use your cameras in lower waterfall, alph.” Adjusting her glasses, she put the phone between her shoulder and ear. “Oh, y-yeah..”, she blushed. “Ah, she’s near her usual post looking around for something.. with Dogamy and Dogaressa? Sh-she doesn’t seem too happy..” More speedy clacking sounds were heard, then a gasp. “Oh no..” Sans breath hitched slightly. “what?”

“Th-the human’s phone case.. is s-so.. cute!! I-I think that’s a Mew Mew Kissy Cutie phone charm!!” Sans coughed. “oh man, did i accidentally call the hotline for idiot babies instead of the great dr. alphys??”

“Listen, I’m helping you save your girlfriend, be _thankful_!”

This was the second time someone had referred to you as his girlfriend. First was Flowey, which honestly doesn’t count for much, but now Alphys? “she’s not my girlfriend, alph. i’m wholly devoted to my wife, psy ants.”, he jeered. “Psh, yeah, the science of h-human anatomy!! I see the way you look into her eyes, y-yearning for her attention.. your body language says ‘I’m closed off emotionally’ but y-your eyes say ‘LOVE ME’!!!”

“alphys.”

She scratched the back of her head before going back to her ramen. “But… i-it is true. I mean, when have you ever given this much thought and care into what a human th-that falls down here does? If they don’t hurt P-papyrus, you always just let them be.” Alphys blew on her lukewarm noodles and clumsily placed them in her mouth with chopsticks. She made a big slurping sound much to Sans’ annoyance. “If Undyne catches up to her… and she’s not strong enough to fight back… do you really want to live w-with knowing you never told her you wanted to smooch her face?”

A hearty scoff surprised her. “that’s something i’ll never have to worry about.. for more reasons than one.”, he said half distractedly.

It was always vague answers with Sans. He always acted like he knew everything. That he was above it all, like some god playing four-dimensional chess and everyone were merely his pawns. But this time was different. His hands were tied. He would have never called Alphys otherwise. ‘ _What was it about this human that he needed extra eyes for?’_ Alphys slurped up the last of her noodles with a sigh. “W-well, if you’re sure.. Message me on Undernet for updates on the human, okay? I have to go do something s-super important, so I’ll talk to you later!!”

Sans raised an eye socket. “rewatching mew mew kissy cutie for the 5th time this month?” He could almost _hear_ the smug face she had on through the phone. “ ** _Yes_**. C-ciao!!”

 **Click**! Alphys sat upright in her computer chair, wistfully staring at the screen as she usually did. Seeing you run confidently across the dock made her heart jump for a second. The determined look on your face reminded her of a certain fish. And for Sans to have so much faith in you? That was new.

She couldn’t wait to meet you.

* * *

A chill ran down Papyrus’ spine. From miles away, he could sense a big storm was a-comin’. He wanted to turn back and take you to the house where you two could make the best pasta the Underground had ever seen. Maybe even reenact those battle scenarios you never got to do. Possibly save you from Undyne. But he couldn’t. He knew you had to go. And speaking of battle scenarios, Papyrus couldn’t stop thinking of how valiantly you fought him today. Even though you never once threw a hit, all your moves were as graceful as a.. uh.. thing that was very graceful and elegant. Your jumps, your landings, even when you got hit… you never gave up. Ever. “OH NO..” Papyrus whispered, hefting up his chest armor slightly over his face. “SHE’S.. MEETING ALL MY STANDARDS!!”

In an effort to get his mind off of you, he took out his phone to play one of his favorite games, Snake. He forgot that the last thing he did with his phone was take silly selfies with you. One with peace signs, another where you acted like you were going to bite his head, and a few where your cheek was pressed up against his, smiling. Papyrus stopped to stare at the pictures you both took. “NYEHH! GET YOURSELF TOGETHER, PAPYRUS! IF SHE WAS IN ANY DANGER, SHE WOULD CALL. YUP!! THERE’S ABSOLUTELY NO REASON TO BE WORRIED IN ANYWAY. EVER.”

So he called you instead.

Four notes of a melody you never heard before played nearby you. You couldn’t figure out what it was until you looked down at your purse. “Oh, Sans’ phone! Papyrus is calling?” You answered it with a vibrant ‘yello’. “’YELLO’ TO YOU TOO, HUMAN!! H-HOW ARE YOU?”

“I’m the same as you saw me an hour ago.”

“WELL U-UM WHERE ARE YOU RIGHT NOW?? I’M JUST UH.. DOUBLE CHECKING TO MAKE SURE YOU ARE SAFE!!”

You took a good look at your surroundings as you walked. “Uhh.. I’m near another one of those sparkly diamond things.”, you replied, ducking down to swing your hand through it. “And in front of me is… your _brother_?” At the mention of his title, Sans leaned against a sturdy looking telescope and winked at you. You weren’t going to try to figure out how he got in front of you AGAIN. For someone so lazy, he sure got around quickly. Switching the phone into your other hand, you briskly walked past Sans with a confused look on your face, but didn’t say a word. Seeing humans confused over his teleporting abilities never got old to him. If only you knew what he really had up his sleeve.

“SPARKLY DIAMOND THINGS? I’VE NEVER SEEN ONE OF _THOSE_ IN WATERFALL.. OH, BUT WHAT’S MY BROTHER DOING?? SLACKING??” You looked behind you to confirm Papyrus’ suspicions, but Sans was already gone. “Oh, he’s working hard. Somewhere. But yeah, I’m safe. I’ll call _you_ if I need anything, okay? If anything, I’ll call you later tonight and no time before.” Before Papyrus could keep you, you ended the convo with a long 'bye' and ended the call.

There was no reason for him to fear.

You had this.

* * *

“You’re telling me the cat girl was a HUMAN this whole time? We were tricked!” Dogaressa held her head in confusion. “What a turn of events!”

“Yup. The key to freedom was right under my nose this whole time! I can’t believe I believed her. But humans are great liars, it was inevitable.”, Undyne remarked. “Did you guys get her scent yet?” Dogamy bent down to sniff a suspicious looking footprint. “Her scent is the sweet-smelling perfume, right?”

Undyne snickered. “Yeah, that human stuff is strong. But she smells nice, I guess. _For a human_.”, she barked. Dogaressa perked up and looked straight ahead. “She’s about halfway through Waterfall, boss! If she gets to Hotland, then..” Undyne’s eyes grew wide. “Then let’s go! She **can’t** escape!” The two dogs got into fighting position. “Yeah! Let's go kick some human tail!”

The chase was on. As you nonchalantly walked through Waterfall with an umbrella (courtesy of a lone rack filled with umbrellas nearby), Undyne, Dogamy, and Dogaressa were hot on your trail. You had met back up with MK and kept him out of the rain as he rambled on about his love for Undyne. “Man, Undyne is sooooooo cool. She beats up bad guys and NEVER loses!”, MK shouted. You raised an eyebrow. “Does she now?” It was so cute you almost wished he was your kid.

“She's too cool to ever hurt an innocent person, though!” You rolled your eyes, attempting to say something slightly sarcastic before you two were hit with a dead end. You looked around and scouted another rack to return the umbrella you were holding. “Ugh, there’s no way around this.. I think we’re gonna have to climb.” The blockage was only a couple feet taller than you were, so you climbed on top with relative ease. You turned around to MK to get him next. “Alright, buddy, give me your h—” An embarrassed blush spread across your face. You totally forgot that MK doesn’t have.. hands. _Or arms_. “Yo, you go on ahead. Don't worry about me. I always find a way to get through! Later!”

Monster Kid turned around excitedly and ran in the opposite direction. You waved him off before continuing. “What a cute kid.” Before you was yet another one of those ‘good luck’ stars Sans told you about. It was becoming tradition to pass your hand through them when you found them, even if just to hear the annoying noise it made when you did. Instead of walking passed it, you took a seat right beside it. You had been walking for who knows how long now! It’d be okay to take a little break here, right? Opening up one of the bags of chips Grillby gave you, you snacked as you looked through old photos on your phone. The pain of seeing your moms smiling face in some of them ruined your appetite. You closed the bag and stared at the ceiling instead.

A few minutes into your pity party, you heard the drum of frantic feet.. and frantic sniffling. You guessed it was MK back from not being able to find a way around. “She’s close..”, you heard someone whisper. Instead of letting MK search all over for you, you looked over the blockage and announced yourself. “I’m right here, MK.”, you chuckled. It wasn’t MK, it was those two dogs you saw at Grillby’s once. Weren’t they part of the Royal Guard?

The female dog gasped. “SHE’S RIGHT THERE!” Her loud tone startled you, causing you to stumble backwards. An armored hand struck the rock face, effortlessly hoisting themself up and in front of you. “Undyne?”, you choked. Her face contorted in ways you didn’t even know were humanly (monsterly?) possible.

“You remembered my name? Good. ‘Cause it’ll be the last thing you ever remember, **HUMAN**!”

‘ _Oh God,_ _she found **out**_.’ Out of fear, you threw the bag of chips at her face. “WHY YOU LITTLE—” Your legs moved on their own, trying to get you out of a situation you prayed would never happen. While running with your phone in your hand, you had an idea. You took out Sans’ phone and dialed the first contact. “Pick up, pick up, please!”

“HELLO, HUMAN??? I THOUGHT YOU S—”

“I LIED!”, you interrupted. “HELP ME!”


	18. Human's F*ckin' Pissed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning for some uh, strong language. per the title, reader isn't too happy this chap lmfao

“ARE YOU OKAY???”

“SHE FOUND OUT!”, you yelled between breaths. “How do I calm her down? Or where can I hide? Because she’s, how you say.. _FURIOUS_!” Having that ten-minute break helped recover some energy, but you were no Usain Bolt. Though, Undyne would be pretty impressed by your speed if she wasn’t trying to kill you right now. “Oh no you don’t!”, she shouted. A warble-y sound and blue light shining from below made you halt to a stop. You were unsure of what it was but if you had learned anything from your time down here, blue did not mean good. Spears cut through the wooden panels, just scarcely missing your knees. Papyrus knew that sound. He had watched Undyne fight too many times not to. “HUMAN, I WILL BE THERE SHORTLY, SO STAY PUT!!”

“Papyrus, you don’t have t— oh he hung up. WHATEVER!”, you screeched. There was no end to Undyne’s onslaught of spears. A water puddle almost made you lose your grip, but you got back up and kept running. “How many dead ends can there _be_?” It seemed like every turn you took was the wrong one. The adrenaline was wearing off and you were wearing down. This was not a good look. “NGAAAHHH, JUST DIE ALREADY!”, Undyne yelled at you. “Why?!”, you screamed back.

“You're standing in the way of everybody's hopes and dreams! **NOW STAND STILL AND LET ME KILL YOU**!”

Turning left seemed to be the correct choice… kinda. You’d finally made it to a large expanse. On the other side looked like a single path towards freedom. Before her next attack, you saved up some energy.. then bolted.

The distance between the two paths felt like forever. Or maybe it was because of all the detours you had to take avoiding Undyne’s attacks. You were finally within arm’s reach. A loud “NO” pierced through the air, startling you. ' _Haha'_ , you thought. You wanted ask how she liked them apples, but the voice sounded overwhelmingly… male. So you turned around.

With his cape somewhat majestically blowing in the wind, Papyrus had arrived. “NEVER FEAR FOR THE GREAT PAPYRUS IS HERE!!” For someone who said something so nerdy, he actually looked kinda robust. “Papyrus, I told you you didn’t have to come!” Papyrus was too busy keeping his eye on you that he didn’t notice that Undyne was still attacking. Scattered blue lights shone under him. You had danced with Undyne’s spears long enough to know the time it took for them to charge up: 3.5 seconds. His foot was about to come down on second 2.5. You wouldn’t have enough time to warn him.

With one strong step on the soon to be spear, you put both hands on Papyrus chest and pushed him with all your might. “A-AH??” What sounded like a sword being unsheathed was actually Undyne’s spear going through your body. You had been hit by Papyrus’ magical bones a few times before, and while it was weird feeling, it did _not_ feel like this. It felt like your mind and body fell out of sync then were put back together. Your _SOUL_ hurt. Papyrus could only stare. “H-HUMAN..?” You were frozen. A whirring sound above your heads made Papyrus snap up. Her spears were about you rain down on you. Look what he made you do, he thought. Wasn’t he here to save _you_?

Without thinking, he lunged at you to cover you with his body. The sheer force of the lunge knocked you out of your magic induced state and right off the edge of the walkway. “..OOPS.” You opened your eyes to pitch black nothingness.

“P-papyrus? What’s going on?!” In the lowest volume you have ever heard Papyrus speak in, he replied, “WE ARE FALLING.”. Wrapping your legs and arms around Papyrus, you cried. “ **Why** are we _falli_ — oh GOD I’m gonna die!” You couldn’t even get the words out without hyperventilating. You clamped your eyes shut, feeling the pressure of the fall. “DO NOT WORRY HUMAN, YOU WILL LIVE. YOU ALWAYS DO!” You found his skull in the darkness and held it gently. “ ** _WHAT’S THAT EVEN SUPPOSED TO MEAN???_** ”

All you could hear was the sound of your own screams and a distant Undyne yelling about ‘being a traitor to all monsterkind’ before you were knocked out cold for the third time this week.

* * *

Oh! You've fallen down, haven't you...

Are you okay?

Here, get up...

/.;’*%, huh?

That's a nice name.

M y n a m e i s . . .

The smell of rotting garbage would be enough to wake anyone right out of their sleep, but with the fall you just had, it was ineffective. Only after the smell entered your mouth from a yawn did you awake. This area didn’t look familiar to you at all. Where was the snow? Oh, right. You did leave the bone brother’s house today, so you should be in Waterfall. But even then, this still didn’t look familiar to you. Lifting your head up and looking down would cause you to remember everything that happened just an hour or two ago.

“Papyrus?! I’m so sorry— God, how long have I been on top of you?”, you said shyly. Papyrus didn’t respond. “H-hello? Papyrus...?” A tap on the face didn’t wake him. You immediately went into worry mode after you saw that his ‘battle body’ was cracked. Before attempting to shake him, you put your ear on his chest. Obviously, there was no pulse, but there was a hum. _Maybe this meant he was okay?_

Through the cracked portion of his armor, you could see something shining in his chest. You tried peeking inside but all you saw was something white and vaguely heart shaped. _'Is that.. his SOUL...?_ ' A hand on your head stopped you from peeking any further. “HUMAN.. YOU’RE OKAY! I WAS ALMOST WORRIED FOR A SEC!!”, Papyrus yelled in a slightly raspy voice. “NOW.. WHERE THE HECK ARE WE???” You jumped at Papyrus, hugging him tightly. “You’re okay! Don’t ever worry me like that again! Actually, just never do any of what you just did ever again.”, you told him sternly. He rubbed the back of his head in embarrassment. “SORRY.. I JUST NEEDED TO MAKE SURE YOU WERE SAFE!!”

“Yeah, we’re safe, alright. In a dump.” You stood up and brushed yourself off. “If the fall didn’t kill us, the smell will.”, you remarked, helping Papyrus up to his feet as well. As soon as you took one step forward, your foot fell deep into the water. “Well.. there goes my only pair of socks.” You put your mini-turtleneck over your nose and kept going.

“Let’s go.”

* * *

You and Papyrus embarked on an unplanned journey together throughout Waterfall. A very angry training dummy tried picking a fight with you, but you were way more ticked than he was. You took it by the torso and yeeted it into a nearby pile of trash, unphased. The angry squelching of your wet boots as you walked away made Papyrus giggle.

It was a pretty straight ride until you were met with puzzles. Papyrus easily cleared it by hitting those mushrooms you loved and turning on lights in a specific order. The face he made when completing it made you grin too, so you just had to ask. “I noticed you’re really good at puzzles, Paps. How’d you get so good?” A twinkle in his eye told you that this convo was about to be _long_. “IT ALL STARTED WHEN I WAS A BABY BONE..”

Exhausted and annoyed was written all over your face, but he didn’t notice until 15 minutes into the (purely one-sided) conversation. Papyrus then looked over with concern. “Y-Y’KNOW WE’RE VERY CLOSE TO HOTLAND.. AFTER WE ENTER THIS CAVE, YOU’LL.. Y’KNOW…” The sadness in his voice made you look away. “Sorry, Papyrus... I’m just a little tired.” Turning left, you could see it. And boy, could you _feel_ it. Hotland was a few feet away! Before you could take one step into Hotland, you were blindsided by something fast and blue.

A spear.

 _Of course_.

“You've escaped from me for the LAST time!”, she bellowed, jumping down from a huge boulder. “Let's end this, right here, right now.” As Undyne charged up her magic, Papyrus had assumed a defensive stance in front of you, ready to shield you from anything Undyne had up her sleeve.

“ **Any last words**?”

Closing your eyes, your reply came out as a calm whisper.

“I’ve had it.”

Undyne cackled, spear readily in hand. “Huuuuh? I can’t hear you, fufufu!”, she prodded. Something snapped in you.

“I’VE. **HAD**. _IT!_ ” Both Papyrus and Undyne were surprised at your outburst. You almost felt embarrassed for losing your cool, but the box had already been opened. “Like, _shuuuuut_ up! I didn’t even come down here out of my own free ass will and this is the sh*t I get? I was PUSHED down here, on my 20th f*cking birthday no less! So now I find a whole f*cking nation of MONSTERS, and while this would be something fun and _exciting_ , noo, these monsters want to kill all humans ever! The f*ck?” Papyrus eyes bulged, he had never heard so many cuss words in his life. “I _get_ it. Humans locked you down here for however many years. But the ONE human that wants to help you all out, you try to kill? Almost killing your so-called friend in the process? Unforgiveable.” You pushed Papyrus out of your way to stand right before Undyne. “So if you want to fight? Then let’s fight. But no magic. Let’s do it the old-fashioned way.”, you hissed cracking your knuckles. “I’ll be getting home to my family. Think on if you want to return to yours.”

No one said a word. Even though you were still terrified of accidentally killing Undyne, you meant every word you said. Confusion was quite apparent on your face when Undyne started howling with laughter. You stared at her, dumbfounded. ' _Wh-what?_ ' Undyne continued her laughing fest as she put her hand on her knee, using the other to fan her face. “Oh my gosh.. that.. was.. _HILARIOUS_!!” Now you and Papyrus were the ones thoroughly confused.

Undyne closed her eyes and grinned. “You’re the first human to ever talk to me that way. You almost would have scared me, if it weren’t for those namby pamby arms of yours.” She walked over and gave you a noogie. “You’ve got spunk, punk! ..And you smell like garbage.” She snorted at your unhappy expression. “C’mon, let’s get you a shower!!”

As she dragged you back to her house, you stared at Papyrus for clarification. All he could give you was a confused shrug, prompting him to jog behind you and Undyne.

As much anger you still had sitting inside you.. you just buckled in and let it happen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well, everyone's friends now somehow. the underground and its citizens are an interesting lot.


	19. Too Bad, Undyne Time

Waterfall was fairly quiet besides Papyrus’ rattling bones. “SO.. IS EVERYONE FRIENDS NOW?? ME, THE HUMAN, AND MY BOSS, ALL FRIENDS. H-HOW EXCITING!!”, Papyrus chimed in. His smile was genuine even if he was a bit nervous. You were quiet as Undyne dragged you throughout that puzzle ridden path you and Papyrus cleared mere hours ago. Undyne pumped her fist in the air while continuing holding you with the other. “Heck yeah!! We’re gonna be BESTIES!!”

You blinked.

.. _besties_?

You attempted to wiggle your way out of her grip, but she was strong. “You’re crazy if you think I’m gonna be besties with you after you tried to k—"

A hand clamped down on your mouth before you could finish your sentence. “Too bad!” Undyne slammed a door open and practically threw you inside. “Make yourself at home, punk!” You looked around slowly, blindsided by all the.. color. Was this Undyne’s house? It was surprisingly kitschy and.. cute. Well, except for the huge sword right besides the dining table. That definitely seemed more Undyne’s speed.

Papyrus was the last one in, making sure to wipe his feet well before stepping inside. Undyne had already moved passed you on the floor to get to her room. “Why not take a seat at the table?” Papyrus diligently took a seat and urged you to do the same. Kissing your teeth, you stood up. Was anyone else remembering Undyne tried killing you just 15 minutes ago? Still, you took a seat next to Papyrus, confused at this whole situation. He saw the unreadable expression on your face and spoke up. “UNDYNE IS WARMING UP TO YOU!! ISN’T THAT GREAT??”, he whisper yelled.

“Grand.”, you replied.

The intensity in which you were looking at Undyne’s back worried Papyrus slightly. After a few seconds of thought, he understood what he had to do. Promptly getting up, he headed near one of the windows. “WHOOPSY DOOPSY!! I JUST REMEMBERED! I HAVE TO GO TO THE BATHROOM!!” You raised an eyebrow. “You don’t even have a bathroom in y—” Papyrus crashed through the window at full speed as you stared on. Undyne came out of her room calmly as if this was an everyday occurrence. “I can't believe he leapt through the window like that. Normally he NAILS the landing.”

The realization that you were now alone with Undyne dawned on you. You quickly got up from your seat while Undyne just grinned, her armor shifting loudly as she turned to you. “Oh shoot, did you want a bath or a shower? I’m setting a bath for you.”

Your eye twitched. “Wh.. why?”, you asked. Undyne turned from her room door. “Why what?”

“Why in the fresh hell are you trying to befriend me? Is that what’s customary down here? ‘Sorry for almost murdering you, let’s make friendship bracelets now, I guess’!”, you mocked. Undyne guffawed at your joke, but you weren’t even trying to be funny. “Honestly, yeah,” she replied, “I have a weird feeling that’s happened before. I mean, almost everyone you’ve met does or would want to kill you if they knew.. even Papyrus was SUPPOSED to capture you. But he ended up being FRIENDS with you instead!”, she yelled. “But any friend of Papyrus is a friend of mine.” You were on guard when she came over to sit across from you. Her fish embroidered doily shifted slightly.

“And while I’d usually mark the line at humans.. especially cowardly, lying humans.. YOU WERE PRETTY BADASS!! Challenging _ME_ head on? FUFUFU!! YA GOT GUTS!” While Undyne laughed to herself, you honestly weren’t sure what to make of her. She wasn’t weak, but for right now, she was harmless. Though, her armor made her look menacing, helmet or not. She really seemed to be having a good time, laughing away and making jokes. You groaned, massaging your temples. Were you really about to trust someone who tried _killing_ you? Yes, you trusted two skeleton men who you knew for five minutes at most, but this was different!

One of Undyne’s forked ears twitched, making her go quiet. “Hold on.” She got up and turned off the bath water, coming back with a towel, rag, and a bar of soap. “It’s all yours, BESTIE!!” Taking the pile of items, you were honestly just speechless. What could you say? ‘ _No, I hate you, f*ck your bath’_? Or maybe yell ‘ _Die_!’ and stab her in her good eye with the bar of soap? You just shuffled passed her into the bathroom, mumbling a ‘thank you’ as you closed the door.

Undyne sat on her bed and flicked on the TV. “HURRY UP AND BATHE SO WE CAN GET IN BED TOGETHER!! I HAVE SO MUCH TO SHOW YOU!!”

You dropped your pile of bathing items.

“S-SO WE CAN DO WHAT???”

* * *

The bath was _so_ relaxing. Every ache and pain didn’t magically disappear, but most did. And anything was better than being in wet socks. You stepped out of the bathroom in a big, fish patterned towel. Undyne turned around, surprised. Seeing her shocked you as well. She was… naked. Or at least that’s what it felt like. She had taken off her armor, allowing you to see her with normal clothes on underneath. No wonder she called your arms ‘namby pamby’, she was ripped! And for the first time, you caught a glimpse of her other eye. It was completely clouded over…

“I wasn’t expecting you to come out so soon—", she mumbled, hurriedly putting back on her eyepatch. She gave you the feeling that seeing her other eye was something very personal. Weren’t you rude to her about it the other day? _'_ _Oops_. _'_ “Anyways, here.”, she said, tossing you a dress and a pack of undies. “Both are unused so you can keep ‘em.” You put on both and looked in the mirror. A baby-doll cut dress? It was definitely not something you saw Undyne wearing, and you were very confused on why she’d have it. If it was barely covering on you, then it had to be non-existent on Undyne. You didn’t ask.

“Want tea?”

You fanned your face, walking to the fridge. “I’m actually hot after that bath. Got any ice cream?” Undyne shook her head. “Nah, I hate cold food. Alphys fixed up my fridge so it heats up food instead! Hot Fridge... The world's greatest invention!”, she howled. “But if you want ice cream, go out and head east! The nice cream man’s open 24/7!” Putting on your (slightly drier) boots, you headed out the door.

“Be back!”

Undyne didn’t tell you that heading east would make a bird carry you over a disproportionately small gap. In what world could a bird carry over 100 pounds? This world, you guessed. You thanked it for its service (making it quack happily) and went on your merry way.

“Ice cream is _HOW MUCH_?” The blue bunny guy laughed and tapped his cart. “Sorry, buddy! 25G! No discounts!” You looked through the money Sans gave you and sighed. You didn’t have enough. This ‘nice’ cream man wasn’t all that nice after all. Even after begging and pleading, he still stuck to his offer. Stomping out of sight, you angrily mumbled to yourself. _'_ _I didn’t get a bird to carry me several feet just to NOT get ice cream_. _'_ There _had_ to be another shop you passed by, but you couldn’t remember where exactly. Looking to your right passed the telescope, you spotted something grey. A door?

It’s been a long day, but you _don’t_ remember a door being there before.

Not only was it a door, but a door smack dab in the middle of a hunk of rock. Who could have carved this out? There were no windows, so it couldn’t be a house, right? Opening it, you quickly peeked inside. Just an uncharacteristically grey room with absolutely nothing in it. Creepy, but fine. You left the door ajar, looking around you to see if this _was_ someone’s home and you were intruding.

That’s when you heard it.

Really. Intense. _Running_.

You whipped your head around, afraid.

A dog?

No.

You were completely alone.

_And it was getting closer._

Something, perhaps, _someone_ , in your mind was practically yelling at you.

**_THE DOOR!_ **

Frantic, you slammed the door shut with your whole body. Your heart was pounding in your ears. You had never heard something so desperate.. so.. feral.

It was _completely_ quiet.

You could hear a pin drop.

No, a feather fall.

You opened your eyes, praying that whatever it was wasn’t in front of you waiting to bite your face off.

Relief flooded your senses when you realized nothing was there. But when you turned around…

Neither was the door.

You just stood there, trembling. Yet another weird occurrence you wanted to put far into the recesses of your mind and forget about. But wasn’t not paying attention to things how you got here in the first place?

You whipped out your phone, shaking so hard you kept opening the internet browser instead of the contacts. Who would you even call? Undyne? Papyrus? _Sans_? He seemed knowledgeable.. sometimes. You tapped his number.

….

It didn’t even ring.

You found yourself running back to Undyne’s. Something did _not_ feel right. You didn’t even wait for the bird this time, opting to long jump over the disproportionately small gap instead. Confused, the bird simply flew to the other side for the next patron. Forcefully pushing the door open startled Undyne. “DUDE, DON’T SCARE ME LIKE THAT!! I almost spear kabobbed you!” She looked over you with concern. “Where’s your nice cream?? You were out there for like an hour, are you okay?”

An hour?

That trek took 15 minutes.. tops.

A pile of pajamas near the table caught your attention. “While you were gone forever NOT getting ice cream, these goobers came over.” The pile of pajamas became sentient and jumped up. Oh! Papyrus? “UNDYNEEEE, WE WERE SUPPOSED TO SURPRISE HER!” Undyne scoffed. “Yeah, yeah. But they brought nice cream, so I guess it worked out??” A cold object touched your left cheek.

With one popsicle in his mouth and one pointed towards you, you caught an enigmatic glint in Sans’ eyes.

“..not hungry?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> waterfall is full of surprises! usually of the creepy kind.


	20. A Blaster From the Past

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YO!!! missed me? sorry for such a long wait, gosh! so much has gone on with me (personal projects, commissions, tech difficulties.. but mostly school, finals were stressful omg!) but i'm glad to be back writing this! i added a silly drawing as a bonus for the wait! :-)

Your eyes went wide. Sans was okay, everyone was _okay_! Even though you were still reeling from your previous shock, you felt a huge weight fall off your shoulders. You breathed a huge sigh of relief and practically leaped at your stocky friend. “Sans! I—" A blue, fruity flavored popsicle found its way between your teeth, shutting you up instantly. “woah, buddy.”, he smirked, “somebody’s crazy about nice cream. here’s your pop, skeleton sold separately.” Undyne snorted as Sans began to hand out the remainder of his popsicles to Undyne and a pajama clad Papyrus. You reached out your hand to say something before you were cut off by Undyne. “Now what are you two here for again?”

Undyne stared at him, her gaze making Papyrus twiddle his fingers and look away shyly. “OH! WELL.. I WANTED TO MAKE SURE THE HUMAN WAS, UH, ALIVE! I-IN ONE PIECE. N-NOT THAT I HAD NO FAITH IN YOU TWO!!”, he chirped out nervously. “I TRIED CALLING THE HUMAN AND IT DIDN’T RING _AT ALL_! YOURS DIDN’T EITHER. SO I HAD TO CHECK.” Papyrus took a huge bite out of his popsicle before lowering his voice to continue. “THOUGH, IT WAS SANS’ IDEA TO SLEEP HERE. HE GOT A WEIRD CALL THEN TOLD ME WE SHOULD SLEEP OVER TO SEE THE HUMAN OFF FOR TOMORROW!”

‘ _A call_?’ You rubbed your arms, feeling the fine hairs rise between your fingers. “SO HUMAN, COME OVER HERE! IT’S SLEEPOVER O’ CLOCK!! LET US COMMENCE THE SLEEPOVERING!!” Papyrus’ announcement made you realize you were still frozen by the door while everyone else was getting comfortable by the table. The walk to the table was slow and methodic, your heart still trying to find its old rhythm before the scare. Nyehs could be heard from a noogied Papyrus as Sans watched the two go at it. You sat down with everyone, attempting to integrate into the conversation, but paranoia was still nipping at your heels. The only people you knew well enough were here all in one place. And your mind wouldn’t let the situation go. So, you had to ask.

“Before that, can I.. can I ask something?” All three monsters turned their attention towards you. You froze up. Their undivided attention made you feel rather nervous. You didn’t do anything bad, so why the hesitation? Licking your lips, you tried to start again and failed. As much as you felt something wasn’t right, you also felt this wasn’t the time to speak about it. Or perhaps, these weren’t the right circumstances to speak about it in. You had an inkling that you’d need to speak with one of them one on one, but that was neither here nor there. Folding your hands together, you pulled a convincing faux smile and tried to relax.

“Nevermind.”, you tittered awkwardly. “It’s not that important. Now, about the sleepover?” Somewhere in your mind, this felt like the right thing to do, the right route to go down.. for now.

Papyrus and Undyne both perked up at the mention of sleepovers, beginning to rant and rave about what to do for the night. “Yeah, the sleepover! Since these nerds came over because of you, we should totally have a human themed sleepover! Eating ridiculous amounts of junk food, playing video games until our eyeballs melt, pulling all nighters, wearing matching pajamas, swinging around HUGE SWORDS—! THIS WILL BE A NIGHT TO REMEMBER!!!"

Papyrus jumped up with Undyne and did a victory dance. Sighing, you looked at Sans. He shrugged, letting you know he was cool with whatever. Maybe this is what you needed right now; some good food, some bad laughs, some nice friends. This week had been nothing short of terrifying, mysterious, and _incredibly_ stressful. Disappearing door be damned. You had a long, fun night ahead of you. It could wait.

* * *

_Within an hour, everyone was sound asleep._

Yes, even Papyrus. Who knew downing four plates of spaghetti could make a person tired? Well, everyone, but apparently not those two fools. And that wasn’t even the beginning of it. Undyne made you all play every popular sleepover game in the book, even though she knew how to play all of 0 of them. As soon as you offhandedly mentioned spin the bottle, she commented on ‘how badass it sounded’ and quickly brought out an empty soda bottle. She totally thought you spun the bottle then hit the person it landed on with it. The game abruptly ended when she learned you have to kiss them, and her bottle spin landed on Sans.

You couldn’t stop giggling to yourself. That was easily the most intense 60 minutes of your life. ‘ _Monsters really knew how to party_.’, you whispered. Despite how short the time you spent together was, you had fun. And as much fun as you had, you deeply wished it was longer… that your friends would have stayed up just a _bit_ longer so you wouldn’t be left alone with so many questions you had none of the answers to.

You got up from the table and dusted yourself off. It took a while to quietly tip toe over game controllers and animesque swords to make your way to the kitchenette near Undyne’s room. Grabbing the first box on the counter, you turned the kettle on. ‘ _Golden tea.._ _hopefully this knocks me out for the night.’_ Within a few minutes, you were sitting at the table sipping your tea and watching the bone brothers fast asleep on the couch together.

Stretching, you blew across the top of your mug, the steam lightly misting the tip of your nose. Looking at Sans and Papyrus asleep made you grin, the two skeleton’s chests rising and falling as they breathed with knows what lungs. All four of you had a great night… but if you really thought about it, you didn’t understand why of all people Sans was fast asleep. You, Papyrus, and Undyne played Super Smashing Fighters… while Sans chilled on the couch quietly. You even offered him a controller, but he shot it down, opting to watch instead. With every new party game, he didn’t have much input unless you specifically asked him something, and even then, it’d be a shrug or light nod. Your eyebrow furrowed. You don’t even think he ate. You exhaled, attempting to shake off that weird feeling arising in you again.

Oh, paranoia. Was everything a sign, a hint? Or was this world just chock full of weird, freaky instances? ‘ _That’s definitely unusual behavior for someone who suggested to sleep here.. or is it_?’, you grumbled, feeling bad for questioning your friend’s motives. But when you closed your eyes, replaying the key moments of your wild night, you had to ask yourself. ‘ _Where was Sans_?’ In your peripheral vision almost constantly. Never in front of you, always behind, always besides. Watching, observing, _afar_ , staring, looking away, looking at _you_ — A flash of blue consumed your sight for a split second, your hands scrambling to catch your mug before it shattered into a thousand pieces. Something akin to wind tickled your ear and sounded vaguely like a whisper. You violently whipped around, straining your left side.

**_“he knows.”_ **

You dropped the cup. Frantically looking all around you, you noticed the house was still; everyone was still in their previous positions, still asleep. Cleaning up your mess as quick as you could, you hightailed it into Undyne’s room. Before succumbing to her food coma, Undyne said you were welcome to sleep in her room. Rational, nonparanoid you jokingly declined, but now had no choice but to take her up on her offer. You hurriedly tied up your hair and laid down beside Undyne, putting a pillow over your head. ‘ _Go to sleep, go to sleep, go to sleep..!_ ’ If you could just go to sleep, tomorrow would be normal. No doors, no whispers, just one straight shot to home, to your parents, no, to your mom, to the safest place you could be other than the recesses of your mind.

A heavy sigh emitted from your mouth before you could finally drift off to sleep. Every night you slept in the Underground was pleasant but devoid of dreams, just you floating in an endless darkness until dawn. This was no surprise to you as you had never been much of a dreamer, on the surface or otherwise. Descending into the darkness once more, you kept falling until you were met with white. Two black holes danced about until your eyes adjusted to room's light. A man. A shambling mass of \’%*.}, but a man. His smile terrifying yet friendly. His hands pierced but kind. He never once spoke but you understood every word.

Pressing his fingers on his lips, he began.

> ❄︎♒︎♏︎ ♎︎□︎□︎❒︎📬︎📬︎📬︎
> 
> [ _THE DOOR..._ ]
> 
> ♓︎ ♎︎□︎■︎🕯︎⧫︎ ♒︎♋︎❖︎♏︎ ❍︎◆︎♍︎♒︎ ⧫︎♓︎❍︎♏︎ ♋︎■︎♎︎ ♓︎ ♎︎□︎■︎🕯︎⧫︎ ♒︎♋︎❖︎♏︎ ❍︎◆︎♍︎♒︎ ⬧︎⧫︎❒︎♏︎■︎♑︎⧫︎♒︎📪︎ ♌︎◆︎⧫︎ ♓︎ ⬧︎♏︎♏︎ ♒︎□︎⬥︎ ❍︎◆︎♍︎♒︎ ⍓︎□︎◆︎🕯︎❒︎♏︎ ♎︎□︎♓︎■︎♑︎ ⍓︎♏︎⧫︎ ⍓︎□︎◆︎ 🙵■︎□︎⬥︎ ⬧︎□︎ ●︎♓︎⧫︎⧫︎●︎♏︎📬︎
> 
> [ _I DON'T HAVE MUCH TIME AND I DON'T HAVE MUCH STRENGTH, BUT I SEE HOW MUCH YOU'RE DOING YET YOU KNOW SO LITTLE._ ]
> 
> 📬︎📬︎📬︎
> 
> [ _..._ ]
> 
> ♋︎♒︎📪︎ ⍓︎♏︎⬧︎📪︎ ❍︎⍓︎ □︎❒︎♓︎♑︎♓︎■︎♋︎●︎ ❍︎♏︎⬧︎⬧︎♋︎♑︎♏︎📬︎ ✋︎ ♍︎♋︎■︎■︎□︎⧫︎ ♐︎□︎❒︎♑︎♏︎⧫︎📬︎ ✡︎□︎◆︎❒︎ 🙰□︎◆︎❒︎■︎♏︎⍓︎ ♓︎⬧︎ ♍︎□︎❍︎♓︎■︎♑︎ ⧫︎□︎ ♋︎■︎ ♏︎■︎♎︎📪︎ ♌︎◆︎⧫︎ ♓︎⧫︎ ❍︎♓︎♑︎♒︎⧫︎ ■︎□︎⧫︎ ♌︎♏︎ ⧫︎♒︎♏︎ ♏︎■︎♎︎ ⍓︎□︎◆︎ ♏︎⌧︎◻︎♏︎♍︎⧫︎📬︎ ✋︎ ♍︎□︎■︎♐︎♓︎♎︎♏︎ ♓︎■︎ ⍓︎□︎◆︎ ♋︎⬧︎ ⍓︎□︎◆︎❒︎ ♎︎♏︎⧫︎♏︎❒︎❍︎♓︎■︎♋︎⧫︎♓︎□︎■︎ ⬧︎◆︎❒︎◻︎❒︎♓︎⬧︎♏︎⬧︎ ♏︎❖︎♏︎■︎ ❍︎♏︎📬︎
> 
> [ _AH, YES, MY ORIGINAL MESSAGE. I CANNOT FORGET. YOUR JOURNEY IS COMING TO AN END, BUT IT MIGHT NOT BE THE END YOU EXPECT. I CONFIDE IN YOU AS YOUR DETERMINATION SURPRISES EVEN ME._ ]
> 
>   
>  ⬧︎◆︎❒︎◻︎❒︎♓︎⬧︎♏︎⬧︎ ⧫︎♒︎♏︎❍︎📪︎ ⧫︎□︎□︎📬︎
> 
> [ _SURPRISES THEM, TOO_.]
> 
>   
>  ♍︎□︎❍︎♏︎ ♋︎♑︎♋︎♓︎■︎ ♋︎■︎♎︎ ◻︎♏︎❒︎♒︎♋︎◻︎⬧︎ ♓︎ ♍︎♋︎■︎ ⧫︎♏︎●︎●︎ ⍓︎□︎◆︎ ❍︎□︎❒︎♏︎📬︎
> 
> [COME _AGAIN AND PERHAPS I CAN TELL YOU MORE._ ]
> 
> ♓︎🕯︎❍︎ □︎◆︎⧫︎ □︎♐︎ ⧫︎♓︎❍︎♏︎📬︎
> 
> [ _I'M OUT OF TIME._ ]
> 
> ⬥︎♓︎●︎●︎ ⧫︎♒︎♓︎⬧︎ ❒︎♏︎♋︎♍︎♒︎ ⍓︎□︎◆︎✍︎ ⬥︎♓︎●︎●︎ ⍓︎□︎◆︎ ❒︎♏︎❍︎♏︎❍︎♌︎♏︎❒︎✍︎
> 
> [ _WILL THIS REACH YOU? WILL YOU REMEMBER?_ ]
> 
> ♓︎ ♎︎□︎ ♒︎□︎◻︎♏︎ ⬧︎□︎📪︎ ❍︎⍓︎ ●︎♓︎⧫︎⧫︎●︎♏︎ ♋︎■︎□︎❍︎♋︎●︎⍓︎📬︎
> 
> [ _I DO HOPE SO, MY LITTLE ANOMALY._ ]

There was no time for a reply. With one close of his palm, it was sunrise. 

You awoke, your gaze flitting up to the ceiling in exhaustion. 'What a weird dream..', you yawned. But you couldn't remember. Not specifically, anyway.

"A man who speaks in hands, huh?", you whispered, smiling weakly.

"I have nothing but bad feelings about this."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *vogues* beware of the man who dances in hands
> 
> (also reader doesn't have a set hair style/color/etc or anything, i just drew what first came to mind and added a few skin tones so y'all would know anyone can be reader!)


	21. Ghastly Gaster the Goopy Disaster

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> about 300 ish words longer than usual, whew! updates are back to wed/sat, sometimes both! (probably both this week omg)
> 
> also i love thinking up my terrible titles. it gives me life.

A long night transitioned into such a short sleep. According to your internal clock, it was morning. You sighed, annoyed. It was time to get up. Trudging yourself out of bed, you found your clothes cleaned on the nightstand beside you. You smiled in response, quickly getting ready and leaving your borrowed dress in its place. With a sigh and finger styled hair, you reluctantly emerged from Undyne’s room. A loud ‘woah’ stopped you in your tracks. “What?”, you mumbled.

You looked rough.

Or, at least, rougher than usual. It kinda sucked that you fell down here, but it sucked even more that you didn’t fall down here with your favorite hair and skincare products.

Undyne flashed you a smile, roughly resting her hand on your shoulder. “You look god awful!”, she roared, “What’s wrong?” A groan escaped you, which she found amusing. “Everything.”, you answered jokingly, rubbing the sleepiness from your eyes. Undyne swept her hand to your other shoulder and brought you in for a side hug. “Everything can’t be wrong when you’ve got your bestest friends by your side! Now come eat, I can’t have you lose your fighting spirit when you’re so close to the finish line!”

A feast was laid out on the living room table. Eggs, OJ, bacon, pancakes, fruits, coffee, tea, and last but not least, spaghetti. You glanced to your right, noticing that Sans and Papyrus were still here and had already begun to dig in. Papyrus put down his forkful of spaghetti the minute he saw you in your entirety. “WONDERFUL MORNING, IS IT NOT? OF COURSE IT IS, THERE’S SPAGHETTI!” Taking a deep breath, you sat down between the two bone brothers. “morning, sleepyhead.” Your mind stirred before registering that Sans was speaking to you. Pushing away your suspicions from last night, you replied. “G’morning, you two.”

Surprisingly enough, the food was edible. You learned from your time here not to touch the spaghetti, but everything else was great, even if a bit burnt or misshapen. It was quiet while everyone finished off their plates, which struck you as a little odd. But unlike last night, the silence was comforting. It reminded you of when you used to sit at the table with your family for breakfast as a kid, the only noise being forks clanking against their plates and occasional sips. It wasn’t something you did much of anymore as your mother left for work by 5am and your stepfather slept in to catch up on rest, leaving you to eat alone most days. Eating with your friends released a wave of nostalgic feelings of simpler days, making you grin like a dork.

A loud clang caught your attention; it was from Undyne. “Well, um.. This is it?? Probably??”, she blurted out, her sharp teeth gnawing lightly at her bottom lip. Your eyes scanned the room, everyone had finished their meals, seeming quite.. gloomy. ‘ _Ah’_ , you thought. You almost forgot that you were leaving, yet again today. How quickly things slip your mind when you’re reminiscing. Papyrus began picking up everyone’s plates to clean up. “Y-yeah..”, you whistled, “it’s that time again, huh?”

“IT DOESN’T HAVE TO BE. YOU COULD STAY DOWN HERE IN THE UNDERGROUND… FOREVER!!” Excusing yourself from the table, you giggled at Papyrus’ declaration. “It _does_ have to be, unfortunately. I have a home to get to, and you all have a new home to make on the surface. I can’t rob you guys of maybe your only chance to make it there.” You scanned the living room for your purse and boots, finding them propped up right besides the front door. “It doesn’t make it any easier to leave my friends a second time, but I gotta do it for the sake of _all_ monsterkind! …Or whatever.”

Undyne laughed heartily, her laugh fizzling off into a somber smile. “Listen, human. It seems… you and Asgore are fated to fight.” Her tone made it apparent that this was very serious to her. “But knowing him... he probably doesn't want to. I'm sure you can persuade him to let you go home. Eventually, some mean human will fall down here and I'll take _THEIR_ soul instead.”, she sneered. “But if you _do_ hurt Asgore? I'll take the human souls, cross the barrier, and beat the hell outta you! That's what friends are for, right? Fuhuhu!”

While still taking in her words, Undyne pulled you in for a big, strong hug. Her skin had a persistent stickiness to it, most likely covering her scales with moisture for protection. Some strands of her hair became entwined with yours as she pulled back, finally letting you go. “Now get a move on. I can’t miss you if you’re still here!” With one swift push, you were out on her welcome mat.

“See ya… Sphynxy.”

**SLAM!**

That was the first time you saw Undyne with such a huge, genuine grin. Running your fingers down the grooves of the door face, you let a moment pass before turning on your heels to walk away. Undyne really was a softie under all those scales and armor. Papyrus’ qualms could be heard through the door, and probably throughout all of Waterfall, much to your amusement. “UNDYNE!! I WANTED TO SAY BYE TO THE HUMAN!!” What sounded like Undyne yelled back, “YOU LIVED WITH HER FOR LIKE THREE DAYS!! YOU HAD TIME!!” The nature of the argument was so silly you snorted, keeping on your merry way to Hotland. You whipped out Sans’ phone and added Undyne’s and Papyrus’ numbers to a groupchat. ‘stop fighting over me nerds lol’ is what you set out to type, until you felt an indescribably eerie feeling pass through you. “AH—!!” It felt like Papyrus’ blue bone attacks but a lot more… alive. Twisting around, you discovered the perpetrator: a little.. ghost.

“…sorry, did i phase through you? i wasn’t looking where i was going, sorry…”, it murmured. The ghost seemed so familiar, but you couldn’t remember where you saw them. You squinted hard until it came to you: the Ruins! You had a _very_ short conversation with them when you walked through with Toriel. They were shy and disappeared quickly; it’d been so long you didn’t even remember their name. What was it again? Nappytime? Boopyshoo? _Hullabaloo_?? “well, i'm going to head home now... oh... umm... feel free to "come with" if you want... i wanted to invite you yesterday, but you seemed a bit upset... but no pressure... i understand if you're busy... it's fine... no worr—”

Lifting a hand, you interrupted their self deprecative fit. “ _I’ll come_. Lead the way, uhhh..”

“napstablook…”

“Napstablook!”

Surprisingly, their house was very close to Undyne’s. They quickly floated through their door, leaving you to open it yourself. Opening the door, you found Napstablook hovering near their computer. “oh... you really came... i... wasn't expecting that. it's not much, but make yourself at home.”

When Napstablook said it wasn’t much, they weren’t kidding. No kitchen, no bed, no bathroom, no tables… but you did spot an interesting looking CD player against the wall beside you. From their general disposition, you figured Napstablook was a total music head. So you asked, “What kind of music do you like to listen to, Blook?”

Ten minutes in, you found out that you were right. You were introduced to so many genres you couldn’t keep up. Like, what the heck is even Monghoulian throat singing? Finally finishing their information dump, they deflated, becoming less confident in themself. “sorry, i didn’t mean to talk your ear off… i probably bored you… oh no…….” You beamed at them, signaling it was no problem at all. “Nah! Never be ashamed of your interests. I’ll be sure to check out uh, Gyftrottian chants when I get back home.”

“oh, wow.. someone used to tell me that too…” Shaking their head, they continued. “anyways, i just came back from getting breakfast, and after a great meal i like to lie on the ground and feel like garbage... it's a family tradition... do you want... to join me...”

“A cat nap sounds heavenly.”, you obliged, mentally skipping the ‘garbage’ part. “here we go... you'll lie down as long as you don't move. so...” The floor being as tidy as it was allowed you to comfortably lay down with your incorporeal acquaintance. Napstablook had their eyes closed, so you decided to close your eyes too. Within seconds, the silence had transitioned into some relaxing ambient type music. If monsters knew how to party, then ghosts really knew how to relax.

A drip on your nose tried to jeopardize your nap but you kept yourself still. ‘ _Hm_?’ Opening one eye to peek, you found Napstablook still relaxing. The room had been dimmed immensely, with what you thought were galaxy-like lights floating all over the room. Another drip fell on your skin, this time on your cheek. It was warm and slimy, feeling disgustingly, well, disgusting. You opened your eyes, hoping it wouldn’t be some annoying dog slobbering all over you again.

But it wasn’t.

_It was that man from your dreams._

His mask-like face, cracked in many places, was almost close enough to touch yours. His body trembled and dripped and broke apart as he recoiled. You couldn’t keep your eyes off him, nor could you open your mouth to speak. Instead, he did the talking for you.

> 👌︎♋︎♍︎🙵 ♋︎♑︎♋︎♓︎■︎ ⬧︎□︎ ⬧︎□︎□︎■︎✍︎ ♒︎□︎⬥︎ ♏︎♋︎♑︎♏︎❒︎📬︎ ✋︎⧫︎🕯︎⬧︎ □︎■︎●︎⍓︎ ♌︎♏︎♏︎■︎ ♋︎ ♐︎♏︎⬥︎ ❍︎♓︎■︎◆︎⧫︎♏︎⬧︎📬︎
> 
> [ _BACK AGAIN SO SOON? HOW EAGER. IT'S ONLY BEEN A FEW MINUTES_.]
> 
> □︎❒︎ ❍︎♋︎⍓︎♌︎♏︎ ♓︎⧫︎🕯︎⬧︎ ♌︎♏︎♏︎■︎ ♒︎□︎◆︎❒︎⬧︎ ♓︎■︎ ⍓︎□︎◆︎❒︎ ⧫︎♓︎❍︎♏︎✍︎ ♏︎♓︎⧫︎♒︎♏︎❒︎ ⬥︎♋︎⍓︎📪︎ ♓︎ ●︎□︎□︎🙵 ♐︎□︎❒︎⬥︎♋︎❒︎♎︎ ⧫︎□︎ ⬧︎◻︎♏︎♋︎🙵♓︎■︎♑︎ ⬥︎♓︎⧫︎♒︎ ⍓︎□︎◆︎ ⬧︎□︎□︎■︎📬︎
> 
> [ _OR MAYBE IT'S BEEN HOURS IN YOUR TIME? EITHER WAY, I LOOK FORWARD TO SPEAKING WITH YOU SOON_.]
> 
> ♓︎ ♋︎❍︎ ⧫︎♒︎♏︎ ♑︎❒︎♏︎♋︎⧫︎ ⬥︎📬︎👎︎📬︎ ☝︎♋︎⬧︎⧫︎♏︎❒︎📬︎ 👎︎❒︎📬︎ ☝︎♋︎⬧︎⧫︎♏︎❒︎ ♓︎⬧︎ ◻︎●︎♏︎■︎⧫︎⍓︎📬
> 
> [ _I AM THE GREAT W.D. GASTER. DR. GASTER IS PLENTY_.]
> 
> ♋︎■︎♎︎ ⍓︎□︎◆︎✍︎
> 
> [ _AND YOU_?]

The man finished signing, letting his hands fall to his sides before extending one to you. Another piece of his body trickled down your arm, making you shiver.

> □︎❒︎ ◻︎♏︎❒︎♒︎♋︎◻︎⬧︎📬︎📬︎📬︎ ✡︎□︎◆︎ ♋︎❒︎♏︎ ♐︎□︎■︎♎︎ □︎♐︎ ⧫︎♒︎♏︎ ■︎♋︎❍︎♏︎ ♋︎■︎□︎❍︎♋︎●︎⍓︎✍︎
> 
> [ _OR PERHAPS... YOU ARE FOND OF THE NAME ANOMALY?_ ]

A colorless hand cupped your chin, his abysmally hollow eyes searching for a reply. His touch was alarming, it’s as if your emotions were peaking with prolonged contact. Sorrow, mania, despair, apathy, rage.. it all came out as one deafening scream.

“ ** _AAAAAAAAAAAAAA_** —"

Napstablook got up from their position, frightened. The entire room went back to normal, with the mysterious man disappearing from your sight as well. “that was nice, but you.. screamed… are you okay…” You quickly got your stuff together and stood up, trying to not fall over from all that laying down. “Napstablook, it’s been real, but I gotta go right now immediately.” You stuffed Sans’ phone in your purse and firmly closed it. “Byeloveyaseeyaonthesurface!”

Running out of Napstablooks house, all they could do was wave as you left. “oh… bye…….”

Racing north from Napstablook’s house, you almost fell into the stream if not for someone you’d never seen before. “Tra la la. I am the riverperson. I love to ride in my boat. Would you care to join me?” Ruffled, you replied. “Um, tch, do you go to Hotland?” They nodded and moved forward, giving you space to hop on. “Then, we’re off…”

The ride was devoid of conversation until the hooded figure decided to speak up. “Tra la la.”, they sang. “ **Beware of the man who speaks in hands**.” You gasped, but they never took their eyes off the destination ahead. “Or don’t. It might be nice to hear someone out for a change.” In a blink of an eye, you were in Hotland. You could feel the heat already.

Walking up the stairs, you noticed you were at an intersection. South was the riverperson, west was back to Waterfall, north was blocked by guards and to the east.. was a laboratory. You turned clockwise. Seeing such a strange laboratory in a place like this... you were filled with.. something. A whole lot of something, even.

But it damn sure wasn’t determination.


	22. Threat to Monster-manity

**WHOOSH!**

The doors to the lab slid open before you even reached them. You peeked behind you at the guards blocking the only other way into Hotland. They stood firmly at their post, neither budging nor moving, almost like two insanely buff statues. Adjusting the strap on your shoulder, you took out your phone with a sigh. ‘ _I swear, my parents are not gonna believe the stuff I’ve been through down here. Well, if I don’t die first._ ’

Inside wasn’t just darkness; it was _advanced_ darkness. A soft hum of mechanical whirring was hard to pinpoint, but something was running nearby. Meaning, someone had to be upkeeping it. A certain “Dr.” crossed your mind, but you overlooked it. Gaster was _probably_ the least of your worries right now. Flashing your light around, you found what may have been what you were hearing: a huge TV. On it was a picture… of you?

Ah, a security camera’s live feed.

Someone was watching you.

A door opened in front you, prompting you to find and flash your light onto it. It was empty. **Click!** The lights flashed on, blinding you. Adjusting to the light, you could see blue tiles, green walls, escalators and a short yellow dinosaur monster.

Donned in a white lab coat with nerdy glasses, the monster spoke. “I didn't expect you to show up so soon!”, they blurted out. “Ummm...” They kept averting their gaze and rubbing a hand over their scales before speaking. “H-hiya! I’m Asgore’s r-royal scientist, Dr. Alphys!” You raised your eyebrows. Alphys! You vaguely remembered her. Undyne’s friend, lives in Hotland and… is smart, you guessed?

“S-since you stepped out of the ruins, I've, um... been ‘observing’ your journey through my cameras! I was originally going to stop you, but... watching you, I felt like... like I was seeing an old friend.” A cheerless smile fell on her face, leaving just as quick as it appeared. “S-so, ahhh, I want to help you! I know a way right to Asgore’s castle, no problem!”

That’s all you needed to hear. You threw your arms around Alphys, pulling her tightly to you. “Alphys, you’re my guardian angel.”, you whined. “I wish I met you _sooner_!” You let her go, allowing her to fix her glasses back onto her face. Alphys tapped her claws against her glasses, averting her gaze yet again. “Well, actually, umm, there's just a **tiny** issue.”, she blushed.

Of course, there was always a catch. And something in your mind felt like you already knew what it was. “Let me guess… I have to fight a killer robot?” Alphys gasped, “H-how did you..”

“Wouldn’t be the weirdest thing I’ve seen down here.”, you shrugged. ‘ _And it probably won’t be the last._ ’ Then, there was a loud clank. Then another. And another. Then an explosion. When the dust settled, you found yourself looking at someone you had only seen on TV.

“ **DID SOMEONE SAY KILLER ROBOT**?”

“ _METTATON_?”, yelled both you and Alphys. Your new nightmare on wheels rolled over, twirling before giving Alphys the hand. “OH, SAVE IT, HUN. YOU WERE TAKING SO LONG AND YOU KNOW MY SHOW HAS TO BE ON TIME.” Mettaton turned to face you, rolling closer to take your hand in his. “TOP FROM UNIQ? I COULD TELL FROM THE CAMERAS BUT I HAD TO COME CLOSER TO MAKE SURE.” A cartoony, gloved hand extended to cup your cheek, rolling it to side to side. “AND YOUR HAIR? OH, DARLING. TOO BAD I’M AN UNSTOPPABLE KILLING MACHINE WITH A THIRST FOR HUMAN BLOOD, OR WE COULD HAVE BECOME FRIENDS BASED ON TASTE ALONE.”

“Could we just skip to the friends part? I’ve had a long week. Dying’s a little inconvenient for me right now.”

“HOW CUTE.”, Mettaton purred. “GORGEOUS _AND_ FUNNY. UNFORTUNATELY, HUMAN… IT’S **SHOWTIME**!”

Game show music blared throughout the speakers of the lab. All you could mutter was, “Oh boy.”

* * *

“LET’S START WITH AN EASY ONE!!”

Mettaton would not let you go. He was as conceited as any star on the surface would be in real life, probably. Thankfully, Alphys was secretly helping you answer those inane questions, or you would’ve never gotten through them. A certain question made you remember what Sans said a few days ago. “ _she loves human culture though, so don’t worry_.” No, Sans. _She was a nerd_. And her love of anime was ultimately what made Mettaton catch on to her little shtick.

So, for his last question, he asked one she wouldn’t be able to answer. “WHO DOES DR. ALPHYS HAVE A CRUSH ON?” You swiped through the answers before peering at the duo. Between Mettaton’s smug aura and Alphys’ flustered face, your hand hesitated over ‘don’t know’ before slamming your palm down on it.

Mettaton put his hand on his rectangular hip, hissing. “CORRECT. DR. ALPHYS HAS A CRUSH ON... THE UNKNOWABLE. YOU SEE, ALPHYS BELIEVES THERE IS _SOMEONE_ OUT THERE. SOMEONE _WATCHING_ HER. SOMEONE SHE THINKS IS "CUTE" AND "INTERESTING." TOO BAD THEY’RE NOT REAL.”

“H-hey, I've done research about this! There **are** alternate universes out there!”, she sputtered. “S-someday, maybe, I could meet them...” Mettaton ignored her, opting to style his nonexistent hair in a handheld mirror. “SURE, DARLING. ANYWAYS, WITH DR. ALPHYS HELPING YOU... THE SHOW HAS _NO_ DRAMATIC TENSION! SO, UNTIL NEXT TIME, DARLINGS!!”

Mettaton took his leave in the form of flying right out of Alphys’ lab’s chimney. You exchanged looks with Alphys. “Well, that was certainly.. something.” With Mettaton gone and your life still intact, you began to take your leave as well.

“W-wait! Let me give you my ph-phone number! Th-then... m-maybe... Wait... where'd you get that phone!? Th-this looks like something I made Sans a long time ago!”

“Oh, yeah, it is! He gave me it since my surface phone wouldn’t work down here.” Alphys snatched the phone out your hand, quickly heading up the escalator. “W-wait a second, please!” After a series of bangs, knocks, and meows, Alphys came back down with the phone looking exactly the same. “Here, I upgraded it for you! I even signed you up for..” For the first time since you’ve met her, she maintained eye contact with you for more than 10 seconds. You looked down at her face slowly reddening with each passing second. “Umm, I, uh.. gotta go to the bathroom!” And that she did.

“Well, uh.. bye, Alphys?” Flipping the phone around in your hand, you headed for the door. “How shy.”

“ **QUITE**.”

You turned around slowly, mentally hoping _you know who_ wasn’t there.

..Why wouldn't it be him?

“Oh God, not only do you plague my dreams, now I’m hallucinating you when I’m awake!”, you screeched. “ _YOU CAN SEE ME? I THOUGHT I WAS LIMITED TO YOUR DREAMS FOREVER. AND YOU REMEMBER ME! PERFECT. THIS WILL GO SWIMMINGLY_.”

“Listen, Gaster.. sir, Dr.. guy. You’re kinda freaking me out. Could Alphys see you? Are you real? Am I really going _crazy_?”

With his fingers pressed against his temple, his body convulsed from what could only be a laugh. “ _OH NO, NO, NO. I AM REAL. THOUGH, I HAVEN’T THIS SOLID OF A FORM IN SOMETIME. BUT SINCE MY PRESCENCE IS STRONGEST HERE AND TIME’S RUNNING OUT, I THOUGHT THIS WOULD BE THE MOST OPTIMAL TIME TO SPEAK WITH YOU_.”

You sighed, holding your head in annoyance. Were you really going to listen to ol’ Gaster the unfriendly ghost right now? Yes, actually. Yes, you were. “I.. okay. But before you start, I have so many questions. For starters, why are you running out of time? Why do you want to talk to me? What are you, really? Better yet, why should I hear you out or listen to anything you say?”

“ _HESITANT, I SEE. A SMART MOVE CONSIDERING WE’VE JUST MET. I HAVE THE ANSWERS YOU SEEK. THOUGH, WILL YOU ACCEPT THEM?_ ”

“Hit me, ghost man.”

“ _AS YOU WISH, HUMAN GIRL._ ” He began walking down the pathways of Hotland, signaling you to follow him. “ _TO START, I’M NOT RUNNING OUT OF TIME AS MUCH AS YOU AND EVERYONE ELSE ARE RUNNING OUT OF TIME. IF YOU HAD COMPLETED THIS ROUTE IN A DAY, I’D HAVE BEEN ABLE TO EASILY KEEP THIS… THREAT UNDER CONTROL UNTIL EVERYONE WAS FREE. UNFORTUNATELY, I’M SLOWLY LOSING GRIP ON REALITY.. SLOWLY LOSING GRIP ON… THEM. AND WHEN I DO..._ ”

“Wh… what threat?”

“ _AH, AH, AH. LET ME FINISH. I’M SPEAKING WITH YOU BECAUSE YOU’RE THE ONLY ONE THAT CAN SEE ME. OR, IS WILLING TO. YOU’RE ALSO THE UNDERGROUND’S ONLY HOPE.. IF YOU KNEW **HOW** TO USE YOUR DETERMINATION. YET, MY SON TOLD YOU NOTHING. HE LET YOU GO THROUGH THIS JOURNEY OBLIVIOUS. HIS NATURE OF LETTING THINGS BE UNTIL THE LAST POSSIBLE MINUTE IRKS ME EVEN IN THE AFTERLIFE._”

Black ooze spilled over his frontal crack. In return, he sighed. “ _NO MATTER. AND AGAIN, I’M W.D. GASTER. A DOCTOR, A SCIENTIST, A.. FATHER. QUITE AN ACT TO FOLLOW, SOME MIGHT SAY. AND FOR WHY YOU SHOULD LISTEN TO ME?_

_...YOU WANT YOUR FRIENDS TO LIVE, DON’T YOU?_ ”

Gaster’s right arm fell off into a gloppy, bubbling mess. Somehow, he still managed to sign his last words to you. “ _WHILE THIS WAS LONGER THAN NORMAL, IT’S VERY HARD TO MAINTAIN THIS FORM IN TWO PLACES. WELL, I’M SURE WE’LL MEET AGAIN. THE CLOSER YOU GET TO THE CORE, THE LONGER I CAN SPEAK TO YOU. GO ON. MY SON’S WAITING._ ” Gaster bowed before his body collapsed in on itself, falling straight into the ground and disappearing, revealing a star in his place.

You stood there, mulling over what just happened. ‘ _So I’m the answer to some threat, a threat that I know nothing of and apparently am not equipped to deal with, and if I don’t get rid of it, my friends will die?_ ’

“Thanks, goopguy, for giving me way more questions than practical answers.

But at least he’s nice.” Per tradition, you swiped your hand through it.

“..I think.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i was trying for the easiest way to have a lot of gaster dialogue and it be smooth. at first i wanted to type in windings with the english translation when you hovered over it, but i'm sure some reader out there reads on their phone. this one's for you, mobile reader.... i got ya back................


	23. It's Showtime for Me to Go Home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> augh i wish there was a thing where i could queue chapters to post!! it'd make getting chapters out in a more timely manner easier for me tbh >:l but uhhh ty for waiting!! i hope you enjoy uou <3

“ _PAPYRUS_! Quit sulking, nerd!!”

The quartet turned trio were in odd corners of Undyne’s living room, all doing their own things before Undyne decided to break the silence. Papyrus twiddled his fingers, letting out an obnoxiously loud ‘nyeh’ before putting his head between his ungloved hands again. “What’s up with you??”, Undyne asked, concerned, “Worried she’s gonna be ripped to little human shreds out there in Hotland?”

Papyrus instinctively jumped at the thought, beginning to put back on his gloves prior to replying. “OH, NOT THAT. WHILE I DO WORRY FOR HER SAFETY, I’M SURE SHE’LL BE FINE! (MOSTLY.) I SAW HER SINGLEHANDEDLY DEFUSE THAT ANGRY DUMMY IN THE DUMP BY.. WHAT IS THE WORD SHE USED.. ‘YEETING’ HIM INTO A GARBAGE PILE.” With his gloves firmly on his hands, Papyrus plucked the elastic, letting it slap back onto his wrist. “AND SHE ALSO HELD HER OWN AGAINST ME! I BELIEVE IN HER.”

Sans, who was buried _deeply_ into the couch’s cushions, lifted his head slightly to his brother’s remark. “..Yeet?”, Undyne squinted. “YES, _YEET_. THE HUMAN SAID IT MEANS TO ‘DISCARD AN ITEM AT HIGH VELOCITY’. SHE DIDN’T TELL ME WHAT LANGUAGE IT’S FROM BUT I ASSUME IT’S ENGLISH.”

“Oh, cool.”, she nodded. “Very interesting. NOW I’M GONNA YEET **_YOU_** IF YOU DON’T STOP SULKING, DORK!” With a quick step onto a chair, Undyne jumped over her own table to squish Papyrus’ malleable skull in her hands. “UNDYNE!!” Sans adjusted himself back into his comfy spot in Undyne’s couch, willfully ignore Papyrus’ pleas to save him from the menace that was Undyne. “So if that’s not the problem, then what is??”

Between pursed lips from Undyne’s continued squishing, Papyrus replied, “I’M NOT SURE. I JUST HAVE A BAD FEELING SOMEHOW. A GUT FEELING, DESPITE LACKING INTENSTINES. LIKE WHEN YOU KNOW MY BROTHER IS REVVING UP TO DELIVER A TERRIBLE PUN AND ALL YOU CAN DO IS LET IT HAPPEN.. THE CALM BEFORE THE STORM.”, he grimaced.

“well, she did look like she was feeling a bit _under the weather_.”, Sans cooed. His audience of two audibly groaned. “AND THERE IT IS. OF COURSE.” Undyne let out a howl before letting Papyrus’ facial bones go. “It’s true, though. She looked awful!! But she didn’t get much sleep last night, so.” She remarked, opting to go back to her seat and finally begin to ready herself for her rounds today.

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN?” Papyrus glanced at Undyne with interest, prompting Sans to at least open an eye socket for the coming answer. “I’m not sure.”, Undyne frowned. “I was fast asleep, but I do remember hearing some noise, maybe a crash? Then fast footsteps into my room. Opened an eye, saw it was her, then fell back asleep.” Fastening her armored sabatons to her feet, she continued. “But all through the night, she kept fidgeting and rolling around.. even calling some dudes name, I think.”

“WHO?”

“Why do you care? Did you want it to be yours??”, she playfully grinned. “N-NO!! I WAS JUST CURIOUS!!” Papyrus was telling the truth, he was genuinely interested in a nonchalant kind of way, but the slight tinge of red on his cheeks hinted otherwise. “Well, if you _must_ know..

…..

….

…

..

.

I forgot.”

“UNDYNE!!”

“Okay, okay, I’ll try to remember, geez!!” Undyne chortled in between Papyrus’ complaints. “Uh.. gosh, uh.. something with a **_G_**.. Maybeeee.. Gaston?? Gasty, gasty.. Ghast _ly_? _Naaahh_..”

“IT’S OKAY IF YOU DON’T REMEMBER UNDYNE, IT DOESN’T REAL—”

“AH, I REMEMBERED! **_Gaster_**! Weird name, but whatever. Must be her thinking of her BOYFRIEND from the SURFACE!!”

The room turned from cozy and laidback to dead silent. Uncomfortable was an understatement.

The sudden shift in atmosphere made Undyne freeze up. “Wh-what? Bad joke?” Undyne sqwuaked, shifting her gaze onto Papyrus’ rather puzzled expression. “Paps??? San..”

“..Sans?” Her voice echoed. Looking towards the couch, she realized Sans was nowhere to be found. “I didn’t even hear the door open.. That twerp!! Was my joke really THAT bad??”

Undyne picked up her pièce de résistance, her freshly shined pauldrons, and fastened them onto her shoulders. The clank against her other pieces of armor is what always prepared her for the start of another day. “Anyways, ready, Paps?” When Undyne turned around, Papyrus, too, was gone, along with the door being left wide open. Staring out the door, she could see Papyrus’ scarf roughly waving in the wind. She sighed. “So much for training, I guess.”

* * *

_Woosh!_

The doors slid open with ease, just like he remembered.

“yo.”

“S-sans, h-h-hey!!” Alphys covered her ramen just before the cup tipped over onto her super computer. Releasing a huge sigh of relief, she set it aside, albeit a bit clumsily. If anything would have happened to her computer.. well… “I wasn’t expecting a-anyone so that’s why I u-um..” Alphys wiped away some stray noodles from her pajama bottom, attempting to look more presentable in front of company, even if it was only Sans.

“it’s fine alph, i just need to get a few things.”

“O-oh, I see, um.. your stuff is still in your safe upstairs if that’s wh-what you’re looking for..? I-it’s been a long time since I’ve seen you in th-the lab!! Just checking i-in, or..?” Alphys watched Sans walk passed her coldly, quickly retrieve his things and spread a few on her table, making sure every piece was there.

“just here on ‘business’.”

The conversation ended before it began. It was awkward. Sans seemed so.. determined. Determined to do what exactly? She couldn’t tell. And to come to the lab? It had been literal years since she’d see him do anything science related, or at least anything science related in _her presence_. Though they were still good friends, things just hadn’t been the same between them since she was appointed royal scientist. She had chalked it up to them bumping heads creatively or even maybe envy, but there was something tingling at the back of her mind that something bigger must have happened. Though, she couldn’t remember what…

But forget that. Her biggest concern was him not even attempting to make a pun at her expense. Maybe a ‘ _ramen_ here for my things’ or even an ‘ _udon_ know how much i miss sciencing’. Anything! And that look in his eyes.. it’s not something Alphys had seen since he turned his back on the Royal Science Board.

“ _hey_. let me know when the human passes through RF2, wouldja? i have some stuff to take care of.”

Alphys fiddled with her glasses and scales, not really privy on what she should reply back with.

“thanks a ton. a _skele_ ton.”

Without a reply, Sans took what he needed and left out the way he came. All Alphys could do was return to her ‘work’. But with what just transpired, her mind was on anything but.

* * *

“I know it’s called Hotland for a reason but _Christ_.”, you choked out weakly. Wiping your forehead, you flicked beads of sweat onto the rocky burnt orange pathways. It sizzled. And to make matters worse, as Undyne so lovingly put it that morning, you _already_ looked awful, you didn’t need _any_ extra help. Felt awful, too. Physical pain? Emotional pain? Mental pain? Who knows! What you do know is that your cozy little world is crashing down on you and everything’s coming to a head in the next 48 hours or so, give or take. You stretched, popping a vertebra in response.

It’s something you tried not to think about.

And for the most part, you didn’t have time to. Not only was Hotland, well, _hot_ , but also infested with the most irritating, impractical, and idiotic ways to get around. Conveyer belts and steam puzzles? ‘ ** _Who_** _authorized this_????’, you yelled internally. You only let up when you guessed that it was probably Alphys or.. _Gaster_ , maybe the king, Asgore? Your mind settled on that thought for a while.

Asgore.. New Home.. Barrier… Surface. _Leaving_.. Not even mentioning that… _threat_.

It’s something you _really_ tried not to think about.

..But you were going to _have_ to, at some point.

Where _was_ he anyway?

A four-note melody from nearby broke you out of your thoughts, your attention now fully on your pocket. “Y’ello?”

“Um, h-hey!! Th... the northern door will stay locked until you... S-solve the puzzles on the right and left! I... I think you sh-should g-g-go to the right first!” Phone in hand, you waited until the steam puzzle flashed right to step on it. “Thanks, Alphy. I really appreciate your guidance with these things. I’ve been mostly winging it so it’s nice to have someone think for me, y’know?”, you smirked. “…Hello? A-alphys?” You heard some sort of squeak or soft shrill before meeting the dialtone. Snorting, you put the phone back in your pocket. ‘Baaaad connection’, you teased.

Alphys was incredibly shy and awkward, yet.. very open on social media. You secretly muted her Undernet notifications because the constant notifications were running your battery dry. But if you were truly honest, the heat was getting to you. If you heard one more ‘ding!’ you might just chuck your entire purse into the lava below. Whenever Alphys truly needed you, she called anyways. Not for very long, but she called. To know someone so socially anxious would try her darnest to work up the nerve to call you was… endearing. Honestly, all your friends and just about everyone you’ve met so far was really freakin’ endearing.

Toriel, a woman who knew nothing but that you were hurt and in need, taking you in and baking you an entire pie. Sans, a sentient bean bag who is honestly a tad bit mysterious and creepy but saved you from freezing your ass off in Snowdin without a second thought. Papyrus, lover and protector of everyone, even including someone like you, someone he was _supposed_ to capture. Undyne, an aggressive.. _aggressive_ leader with a heart of gold, who, _post_ murder attempt, you’d love to get to know better. Gaster, an eldritch horror you’ll probably need therapy to get rid of, who helps you because.. _because???_ And lastly, Alphys, apparent Mew Mew Kissy Cutie extraordinaire, total nerd, but a nice guide through the hotness that is Hotland.

..Your friends were a little weird.

But thinking about how much you loved them… it gave you strength. Perhaps even put a little pep in your step. You couldn’t let your friends down, nor would you let this ‘threat’ get to them before you could set them free. “Good luck” stars? Who needs ‘em when you’re powered by the power of friendship! ..Or something. Stepping onto the steam puzzle ahead of you, you were thrown twice more until you fell into a dim, vaguely checkered patterned room.

 **Brrrring**!

Alphys again, you were sure. “H-hey, it's kind of dark in there, isn't it? Don't worry! I'll hack into the light system and brighten it up!”

After a light flip, Alphys gulped.

“Oh no.”

With the conclusion of your emotional overview of your time in the Underground, and the wonderful, endearing friends you had made, you were face to face with the _least_ endearing person in the entirety of the Underground. Yes, less endearing than Flowey. At least Flowey looked like those cute solar powered sunflower toys you get at the 99c store.

“OHHHH YES!!! WELCOME, BEAUTIES, TO THE UNDERGROUND'S PREMIER COOKING SHOW!!! PRE-HEAT YOUR OVENS, BECAUSE WE'VE GOT A VERY SPECIAL RECIPE FOR YOU _TODAY_!” A prerecorded ‘ooo’ played for emphasis.

“WE'RE GOING TO BE MAKING... A CAKE! MY LOVELY ASSISTANT HERE WILL GATHER THE INGREDIENTS.”, Mettaton pointed in your direction. Mouth agape, you furrowed your brows, pointing at yourself as well. “EVERYONE GIVE THEM A BIG HAND!!!” You were unsure if these were also prerecorded, but you could hear a huge round of applause surrounding the stage. “WE'LL NEED SUGAR, MILK, AND EGGS. GO FOR IT, SWEETHEART!”

Clutching your purse, you grinded your teeth together, clearly annoyed. “The only thing I’m gonna hand you is a knuckle sandwich.”, you muttered under your breath, mockingly. Mettaton must have heard you as he darkly chuckled in response.

“SMILE, DARLING. YOU’RE ON CAMERA.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> p.s. reader doesn't Totally hate mettaton really.. she's just super tired of being stopped on her journey lmfao, cut her some slack~

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading! let me know how i did, how i can improve with formatting, etc. always up for ideas, suggestions, etc! i'm excited to do more and i hope y'all do/will enjoy it!! <3


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